KO's Shadow
kevinosborne.bsky.social
KO's Shadow
@kevinosborne.bsky.social
Tenement Punster
Never understood how the phrase, "kick it into touch" means to abandon something.
Surely that makes it "in touching distance" so you can "pick it up and run with it"?
June 17, 2025 at 5:23 PM
What's the opposite to 'exaggerate'?
Newaggerate?
Currentaggerate?
Maybe just 'aggerate'?
June 17, 2025 at 9:01 AM
Any packet that resembles a crisp packet should open like a crisp packet, I.e. Pull apart both sides centre top.
Not tear the corner off or tear a line down the top of a corner.
I'm looking at your sweets & peanuts, sort bloody selves out.
June 16, 2025 at 6:10 PM
That Top Cat thinks he's so smart but he lives in a bin.
A bin FFS!
June 13, 2025 at 8:43 AM
Thought for the day:
"I Gotta Feeling" repeats "Saturday" because the song is in 4/4 time & 7 days aren't divisible equally by 4.
Had it been 7/4 there would be no repeated days and a much more interesting song.
* A complete bastard to dance to mind.
June 9, 2025 at 3:26 PM
My end of humanity prediction:
One day a vain alien race will discover that for years Humans have been voting themselves the most aesthetically pleasing beings in the entire universe, and they’re gonna be pissed.
May 31, 2025 at 8:39 AM
I used to be a werewolf but I'm alright n......
*10 minutes later*
Oh dear, I just killed again.
May 10, 2025 at 10:17 AM
December 15, 2024 at 9:27 AM
"The choir of children sing their song, they practiced all year long."
All year? This is going to be amazing!
"Ding dong, ding dong, ding dong, ding dong"
🤨
December 14, 2024 at 8:22 PM
Sure it's been asked on here already, but what do we say instead of ReTweet?
ReSky?
ReB?
(I like ReB BTW)
December 3, 2024 at 3:17 PM
Reposted by KO's Shadow
The number of dad jokes you can tell before your kids' friends start to hate you is five.
December 3, 2024 at 5:15 AM
How to use a printer:
1. Insert ink cartridge
2. Print test page
3. Print required document
4. Don't use for 3 months
5. Inks run out
November 30, 2024 at 1:31 PM
Thinking of starting a fat James Bond franchise.
Got to be produced by Chubby Broccoli & star Gorge Lazenby.
Films. So far I've got:
- From Russia with Grub
- Live and Let Fry
What else? What about enemies, henchman?
#sillysaturday #fatjamesbond
November 23, 2024 at 9:40 AM
Reposted by KO's Shadow
Do you like jokes? Here's a list of people who write em

go.bsky.app/K8K5ixA
November 19, 2024 at 12:21 PM
Asked for a small sausage in a café and they brought me a cheerful and high-spirited milky coffee instead.

It was a chipper latte.

#SillySaturday
November 16, 2024 at 11:38 AM
- Did you hear that Knorr turned down the chance to make products for a popular sitcom character?
- Knorr are batty
- No, Del Boy

#LunchPun
November 14, 2024 at 4:05 PM
Reposted by KO's Shadow
If a Jamaican chicken cooking competition ends in a tie, do they have to have a Jerk off?

#LunchPun
November 14, 2024 at 12:01 PM
Reposted by KO's Shadow
go.bsky.app/UhdRTNy

This is a first attempt at a #LunchPun starter pack.

I'll try to keep it up to date, but if you're in it and want to be removed, or if you're not in it and would like to be, let me know.

Please feel free to suggest users.

Please feel free to share it with your followers.
November 14, 2024 at 12:40 PM