Kerry G Kreitzer
@kerrington-k.bsky.social
Retired banker now published author
https://www.amazon.ca/kindle-dbs/entity/author/B0822XGDHR?ref_=dbs_p_ebk_r00_abau_000000
https://www.amazon.ca/kindle-dbs/entity/author/B0822XGDHR?ref_=dbs_p_ebk_r00_abau_000000
Yes, and I really had to bare down and bone up on all the regulations before they let me take over from Ernie, the old Greeter. Ernie bared his soul to me and told me he could barely keep it up any more and was afraid the owners would fire him. I could see the naked look of fear in his eyes. So sad.
December 21, 2025 at 9:45 PM
Yes, and I really had to bare down and bone up on all the regulations before they let me take over from Ernie, the old Greeter. Ernie bared his soul to me and told me he could barely keep it up any more and was afraid the owners would fire him. I could see the naked look of fear in his eyes. So sad.
I worked in a nudist camp for 2 years after my wife split. She took me for everything including the shirt off my back. The owners made me a Greeter. The new recruits always arrived fully clothed and I'd tell them I had a lengthy list of regulations to read and I always asked them to bare with me.
December 21, 2025 at 9:17 PM
I worked in a nudist camp for 2 years after my wife split. She took me for everything including the shirt off my back. The owners made me a Greeter. The new recruits always arrived fully clothed and I'd tell them I had a lengthy list of regulations to read and I always asked them to bare with me.
I went dressed as a whole-ass but people kept saying I had it wrong. They said I was an ass-whole.
December 21, 2025 at 5:39 PM
I went dressed as a whole-ass but people kept saying I had it wrong. They said I was an ass-whole.
I know I would qualify in the Triple Event: eating, drinking wine & sleeping
December 21, 2025 at 5:35 PM
I know I would qualify in the Triple Event: eating, drinking wine & sleeping
I've seen similar occurrences at curling bonspiels.
December 18, 2025 at 6:33 PM
I've seen similar occurrences at curling bonspiels.
Every 8 hours I drag myself away from the computer, crawl out of the man-cave and go in search of my wife. She's usually in the sun room reading or she's on her laptop. I wave and we exchange verbal pleasantries, then it's back to the cave. The shift is usually, 6AM - 1:00PM & 1:30 to 6:00PM.
December 17, 2025 at 10:58 PM
Every 8 hours I drag myself away from the computer, crawl out of the man-cave and go in search of my wife. She's usually in the sun room reading or she's on her laptop. I wave and we exchange verbal pleasantries, then it's back to the cave. The shift is usually, 6AM - 1:00PM & 1:30 to 6:00PM.
We can all 𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐦𝐩et those sentiments!
December 16, 2025 at 11:23 AM
We can all 𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐦𝐩et those sentiments!
Pizza is my favorite food, breakfast, lunch or supper, hot or cold. When I hear the word pizza, I always recall an old joke about an Italian gentleman who hired a contractor to build a house. (see attached).
December 15, 2025 at 9:51 PM
Pizza is my favorite food, breakfast, lunch or supper, hot or cold. When I hear the word pizza, I always recall an old joke about an Italian gentleman who hired a contractor to build a house. (see attached).
Hey, we've had so much snow here in Goderich, Ontario, [Canada], in the last 3 days (28 inches), and it's still falling, that our view of Lake Huron is snow-covered to the distant horizon. All the streets are bordered with 3-4 ft. snowbanks from the town plows. It's like a throwback to the 60's.
December 15, 2025 at 9:12 PM
Hey, we've had so much snow here in Goderich, Ontario, [Canada], in the last 3 days (28 inches), and it's still falling, that our view of Lake Huron is snow-covered to the distant horizon. All the streets are bordered with 3-4 ft. snowbanks from the town plows. It's like a throwback to the 60's.
A very sad affair. I'm sure at Rob's and his wife's funeral the well known phrase, "ashes to ashes..." will be spoken, unlike when the current POTUS bites the dust, when the words may be slightly altered to "ashes to asshole".
December 15, 2025 at 8:22 PM
A very sad affair. I'm sure at Rob's and his wife's funeral the well known phrase, "ashes to ashes..." will be spoken, unlike when the current POTUS bites the dust, when the words may be slightly altered to "ashes to asshole".
In a more(?) contemporary tone and usage, some say when you're conducting business in the "salle de bains" you are
"riding the porcelain pony".
"riding the porcelain pony".
December 7, 2025 at 12:55 PM
In a more(?) contemporary tone and usage, some say when you're conducting business in the "salle de bains" you are
"riding the porcelain pony".
"riding the porcelain pony".
Why do they call it "The Great White Telephone" when you're puking in it?
December 6, 2025 at 11:04 PM
Why do they call it "The Great White Telephone" when you're puking in it?
When Mom made cookies I'd ask if I could have some cookie-dough. She'd say, "No, it'll give you worms." I didn't believe it, so when she wasn't looking I'd grab a finger-full. Never got worms but one day she saw our dog bum-walking across the lawn. Worms she cried, and we never saw old Spot again.
December 6, 2025 at 10:48 PM
When Mom made cookies I'd ask if I could have some cookie-dough. She'd say, "No, it'll give you worms." I didn't believe it, so when she wasn't looking I'd grab a finger-full. Never got worms but one day she saw our dog bum-walking across the lawn. Worms she cried, and we never saw old Spot again.
So how are a spider and a French kiss similar?
Both can lead to the downfall of the fly.
Both can lead to the downfall of the fly.
November 29, 2025 at 9:55 PM
So how are a spider and a French kiss similar?
Both can lead to the downfall of the fly.
Both can lead to the downfall of the fly.
A man took his pet parrot to church one Sunday. Part way through the service the minister said the next hymn would be “Stand up, stand up for Jesus”. The congregation stood and began to sing. Suddenly the parrot started squawking, “Sit down, sit down for Jesus, the buggers in the back can’t see.”
November 29, 2025 at 6:57 PM
A man took his pet parrot to church one Sunday. Part way through the service the minister said the next hymn would be “Stand up, stand up for Jesus”. The congregation stood and began to sing. Suddenly the parrot started squawking, “Sit down, sit down for Jesus, the buggers in the back can’t see.”
Someone once told me that hemorrhoids are considered speed bumps by certain people who like taking that route.
November 27, 2025 at 11:11 PM
Someone once told me that hemorrhoids are considered speed bumps by certain people who like taking that route.
Yes, yes, and I just know you caught the coke in coquettish.
November 24, 2025 at 8:29 PM
Yes, yes, and I just know you caught the coke in coquettish.
That's oftin the case with a can-crusher. 60 hours though, is enough to make you flip your lid. I've heard his wife is the opener for his act and that she's really quite coquettish.
November 24, 2025 at 6:15 PM
That's oftin the case with a can-crusher. 60 hours though, is enough to make you flip your lid. I've heard his wife is the opener for his act and that she's really quite coquettish.
"𝙒𝙝𝙚𝙚𝙡..., he shouldn't have 𝙨𝙥𝙤𝙠𝙚 to you like that."
November 23, 2025 at 6:52 PM
"𝙒𝙝𝙚𝙚𝙡..., he shouldn't have 𝙨𝙥𝙤𝙠𝙚 to you like that."
Yeah, I agree. Before he got sick he was looking definitely pastry. Sadly, the poor old guy didn't have any health insurance due to "rising" costs. Had I known he was in knead, I would have been first in line to fork out some dough.
November 22, 2025 at 3:42 PM
Yeah, I agree. Before he got sick he was looking definitely pastry. Sadly, the poor old guy didn't have any health insurance due to "rising" costs. Had I known he was in knead, I would have been first in line to fork out some dough.
Well if old rumors are true, old Pills kicked the bucket a few years ago due to a yeast infection, and complications from repeated pokes in the belly, so it's little wonder he doesn't date anymore. Over the years he did date a few tarts and got into a jam every now and then, but I always liked him.
November 22, 2025 at 3:09 PM
Well if old rumors are true, old Pills kicked the bucket a few years ago due to a yeast infection, and complications from repeated pokes in the belly, so it's little wonder he doesn't date anymore. Over the years he did date a few tarts and got into a jam every now and then, but I always liked him.
My doctor said keep an eye on your bowels and let me know if there are any problems. So now I'll have a shitty outlook for the rest of my life.
November 22, 2025 at 2:48 PM
My doctor said keep an eye on your bowels and let me know if there are any problems. So now I'll have a shitty outlook for the rest of my life.
I became a fan in 1955 when the Dodgers beat the Yankees and won their first World Series. I was just a kid back then and was quite upset when the team moved to LA because for the most part, I wasn't allowed to stay up that late to listen to their broadcasts. I was devastated about his car crash.
November 20, 2025 at 6:47 PM
I became a fan in 1955 when the Dodgers beat the Yankees and won their first World Series. I was just a kid back then and was quite upset when the team moved to LA because for the most part, I wasn't allowed to stay up that late to listen to their broadcasts. I was devastated about his car crash.
I watch him every week. I never laugh at his monologue because I don't think he's funny. He has virtually no taste in clothes and he doesn't have a clue about tying a good tie knot. I watch him because he often has interesting guests. I never knew so many women disliked him.
November 20, 2025 at 6:30 PM
I watch him every week. I never laugh at his monologue because I don't think he's funny. He has virtually no taste in clothes and he doesn't have a clue about tying a good tie knot. I watch him because he often has interesting guests. I never knew so many women disliked him.
I was puzzled by his (as you say) 𝘤𝘳𝘺𝘱𝘵𝘪𝘤 response as I continued to knead the bag of margarine.
November 9, 2025 at 5:59 PM
I was puzzled by his (as you say) 𝘤𝘳𝘺𝘱𝘵𝘪𝘤 response as I continued to knead the bag of margarine.