Julie Sondra Decker
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juliesondra.bsky.social
Julie Sondra Decker
@juliesondra.bsky.social
410 followers 420 following 610 posts
Novelist, creativity enthusiast, comic scribbler, singer, cartoon nerd, asexuality activist. Author of THE INVISIBLE ORIENTATION. She/her. Not your babysitter.
https://juliesondradecker.com
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juliesondra.bsky.social
Two more. He just kept messaging me and bugging me to talk to him and insisting it was a misunderstanding while still insisting that he totally has a better car now, etc.
November 7, 2025 at 6:56 PM
juliesondra.bsky.social
No idea! I do not date AT ALL and am 4'11" so it's not hard to be tall enough for me to look up your nose. Men's Rights douches have decided it's a shortcut to dismissing women's rejections as depending on things outside their control so they don't have to work on themselves. More of this guy:
November 7, 2025 at 6:54 PM
juliesondra.bsky.social
I had a dude who thought I wouldn't be FRIENDS with him if he didn't have a lot of money to spend on me and an expensive car. And yes, in the ensuing conversation he did INSIST that FRIENDS have dumped him for not wining and dining them. (This guy sent this when I didn't answer him while sleeping.)
November 7, 2025 at 1:46 PM
juliesondra.bsky.social
I felt like that would be disingenuous of the survey developers--to assume survey participants "judged someone less human" while not calling it that--but turns out you're right. The traits rated were "warmth," "competence," and "morality" equaling humanity. Big yikes are still in order, of course.
September 27, 2025 at 4:51 PM
juliesondra.bsky.social
Four-panel comic colored in markers. Panel 1 features a dark-skinned man with a gray beard and gray hair/eyebrows in a collared shirt saying "women have a narrow view of the world. They are overly sentimental and that is why there is no woman alive who could ever write to equal me." Panel 2 features a white man with gray hair and gray eyebrows and a mostly bald head, in a black suit with a tie, saying "Women don't write with real range. They only write about trivial things. I want to read about REAL problems, not women whining and acting like this represents actual conflict." Panel 3: A white man with brown hair and brown eyebrows wearing a black turtleneck says "Women write romance, and that's not interesting to smart people." Panel 4: A white woman with blond hair in a purple shirt sits at a desk looking at a laptop. She looks disturbed and says "For people who won't read women's writing, these guys sure know a lot about how worthless it is!" It’s interesting how often people who talk about literary merit and artistic worthiness are so quick to assume women aren’t writing about real problems, or that the differences we do see in common elements of writing based on gender have clear divisions between what’s nutritious and what’s empty calories. There are more women than men in this world, and still our thoughts, issues, and lives are thought marginal. First, these are all slightly exaggerated and paraphrased from real quotes by men about women’s work. For context, here they are: “I read a piece of writing and within a paragraph or two I know whether it is by a woman or not. I think it is unequal to me.” [Women’s work presents] “sentimentality, the narrow view of the world. And inevitably for a woman, she is not a complete master of a house, so that comes over in her writing too.” —V.S. Naipaul [Women exhibit] “lack of range—in subject matter, in emotional tone—and lack of a sense of humor. . . . the embroidering of trivial themes; a concern with the mere surfaces of life . . . hiding from the real agonies of the spirit; refusing to face up to what existence is; lyric or religious posturing; running between the boudoir and the altar, stamping a tiny foot against God. . . . ” —Theodore Roethke “[R]omance novels, like racists, tend to be the same wherever you turn. It’s pointless to spend much time impugning these books as writing because they really aren’t meant to be considered as actual writing, the same way a Twinkie wasn’t meant to be considered as actual food.” —William Giraldi The common theme here is through some combination of bad experiences with literature, socialized disgust for and condescension toward anything that women enjoy, sexist attitudes toward women in general, overreliance on “award-winning” literature as if the awards are given objectively through some distant assessment of pure merit, overexposure to men’s work as deep and “classic” and women’s work as lowbrow and “popular,” or simple assumption that women’s stories aren’t relevant/applicable/interesting to them . . . these men conclude that they can and should write off literature about, by, and/or for women. And what’s really interesting is how many men, when challenged on this, will have one of these two explanations for why they aren’t interested in women’s work: They just . . . just aren’t INTERESTED, inexplicably, and don’t know what to say when you ask why or what they could possibly believe about ALL women’s work being “not for them.” They have indeed tried women’s work and didn’t like it, insist that the sex of the author has nothing to do with that, and feel justified in generalizing their reaction as applying to any and all literature by women. You KNOW they have not concluded men suck at writing whenever they read a sucky book by a man, or when they encounter a genre or subject primarily written by men that they aren’t interested in. Yet somehow, even though they’re totally not sexist, guys!, reading a comparatively small number of books by women has given them all they need to know about all women authors–they all write the same, or about the same things, or with the same lower or basic quality that they’re sure they objectively assigned to the sample they’ve read. I guarantee you some of these men’s favorite books were written by women writing under an androgynous name or deliberately under a man’s name.
September 5, 2025 at 3:58 PM
juliesondra.bsky.social
I had someone post this on my YouTube once. And even though it didn't describe me whatsoever, I was like . . . wait, does he think it's self evident that this caricature person would be awful? I want to hang out with her actually.
Xavier Roberts 30 minutes ago Do you have any other hobbies besides being asexual? Or is this your career? Also, what northwestern university liberal arts degree did you get and what library or coffee shop do you work at.?
August 18, 2025 at 11:25 PM
juliesondra.bsky.social
August 9, 2025 at 2:17 PM
juliesondra.bsky.social
August 9, 2025 at 2:16 PM
juliesondra.bsky.social
August 9, 2025 at 2:15 PM
juliesondra.bsky.social
Well, I guess I'll post more of the conversation, for everyone's entertainment.
August 9, 2025 at 2:14 PM
juliesondra.bsky.social
God. This reminds me of a dude who hit me with the "you're not like other girls, you actually seem intelligent" nonsense and then, to prove how "intellectual" he was, he said he wanted to discuss "what is your view of science today?" You have to see to believe his "do I sound smart yet?" diatribe.
August 8, 2025 at 7:17 PM
juliesondra.bsky.social
Yeppppp
July 22, 2025 at 8:55 PM
juliesondra.bsky.social
Let me gift you with the actual screenshot then
ABOUT ME My self-summary Born and Raised in Miami but reside here in Tampa . I'm very family oriented, and love sports (but then again what guy doesn't). I love to [activity] and spend time hanging out with friends. I'm an easy going person and try to stay clear of any drama. My dreams are to flourish in my career and eventually own my own business one day. In the mean time I enjoy working in retail and am lucky to have a job considering the economy these days. My favorite music consist of [music], [music], and [music]. However I'm open to listening to anything original. I'm a music junkie so I don't mind other genre's. In my free time I enjoy going to the gym,having fun and most of all I enjoy having great conversations.
July 19, 2025 at 1:37 AM
juliesondra.bsky.social
Aw, cuuute, I got my YouTooz Steven Universe Steven-n-Lion today.
July 1, 2025 at 8:49 PM
juliesondra.bsky.social
Welcome! Yeah he tried to get my sister to dress as Leia for the reception but she was like "fuck this I spent way too much on this dress to not wear it for the whole thing." But there was a guy dressed as Chewbacca running around the dance floor. And yep I still have my bridesmaid dress. :)
June 12, 2025 at 5:22 PM
juliesondra.bsky.social
I don't honestly have too many GOOD pictures but I do know the centerpieces were homemade (and pretty cheap to make)! I have no idea what the deal was with the cake honestly.
June 12, 2025 at 5:58 AM
juliesondra.bsky.social
Dude posted a follow-up: "I was misunderstood!" A friend saw him with a woman and "pursued her," which pissed him off enough to tell the world that everyone must go through HIM to access women he knows and he was "just angry." Somehow doubting the OTHER person's communication is all that's wack....
Edit: I want to clear something up that may have come across the wrong way. The original post was said out of spite. Recently, someone I considered a friend went behind my back to pursue a woman I was spending time with after seeing us together. To be clear, my intention is not to say anyone needs my permission to talk to a woman in my circle, I was just angry when I wrote it. What I’m saying is this: if you see me spending time with someone I may be seeing or getting to know, the respectful thing to do is not to go behind my back and pursue her. They repeated some things from an encounter I had with this person that I expected to be kept private and then proceeded to pursue them. If there’s ever any confusion or interest, talk to me directly. That’s what real friends do. That’s why I was pissed and said I wont take that shit basically. This isn’t about control. It’s about mutual respect, trust, and integrity
June 2, 2025 at 6:57 PM
juliesondra.bsky.social
Amazing that this book was published in 2012 and yet it mentions Donald Trump on page 2
April 29, 2025 at 6:20 AM
juliesondra.bsky.social
Excuse but why is there one Enormo-chip in my bag of mini-chips
(No I am not eating baking chocolate as a sna--SHUT UP.)
February 8, 2025 at 6:01 PM
juliesondra.bsky.social
Vegan "chicken" pot pies were so good at holiday time that I had to make them again!
8 ivy-printed ramekins covered in squares of puff pastry.
January 7, 2025 at 5:04 AM
juliesondra.bsky.social
Peppermint whipped cream means pink coffee!
A coffee mug picturing cartoon characters from Steven Universe is full of coffee with pink frothy peppermint cream on top. A flower-handled spoon sticks out of the cup.
January 3, 2025 at 5:10 PM
juliesondra.bsky.social
Last plate of leftover cookies!
A flower-shaped orange plastic plate holds various holiday cookies of 8 different shapes, sizes, and colors.
January 1, 2025 at 6:29 PM
juliesondra.bsky.social
I may have gone a bit overboard with the homemade holiday treats.
Six plates of different holiday cookies and a peppermint cheesecake.
December 31, 2024 at 2:17 AM
juliesondra.bsky.social
Anyone ever had a single egg with THREE yolks? This is my first time.
December 25, 2024 at 12:48 AM
juliesondra.bsky.social
A four-frame comic from So You Write. Frame 1: A young woman with tanned skin, long brown hair, a teal collared shirt, and glasses holds a stack of books in her hand--three books with X's on the spine, and the top one with a check mark on the cover. Caption: "Author who wrote multiple terrible books before finally writing a publishable one." Frame 2: A young woman with brown skin, black hair in three puffs, and a long-sleeved green shirt holds a tablet with stickers on it. Caption: "Author who wrote fanfic throughout their teens and twenties before ever writing original fiction." Frame 3: An older woman with pale skin, short gray curly hair, glasses, and a pink shirt sits at a desk writing with a pen. Caption: "Author who tried writing for the first time at age 59 and it was a masterpiece." Frame 4: A young woman with light skin, long blond hair, and a purple shirt holds a picket-sign style sign that says ALL VALID in red letters. A talk bubble reads "Gosh it's almost like there are multiple paths to being published!"
December 17, 2024 at 3:55 AM