Joshsplaining 🏳️⚧️
@joshcomedy.bsky.social
Stand-up comic/sometimes sketch comic/comedy writer;
He/they;
Trans masc/nb;
🖤🩶🤍💜
🌮🛸👩🎤🧜♂️ 💮🐝🐙🎤
Voted “Most likely to travel the world in an Elephant” in High School
Places I’ve lived: 🇺🇸🇯🇵🇨🇳🏳️⚧️🔥
He/they;
Trans masc/nb;
🖤🩶🤍💜
🌮🛸👩🎤🧜♂️ 💮🐝🐙🎤
Voted “Most likely to travel the world in an Elephant” in High School
Places I’ve lived: 🇺🇸🇯🇵🇨🇳🏳️⚧️🔥
Things I have learned about life: don’t hoard stickers waiting to put them on stuff. Stick those SOB’s on everything. Now!!!
August 10, 2025 at 3:04 AM
Things I have learned about life: don’t hoard stickers waiting to put them on stuff. Stick those SOB’s on everything. Now!!!
Ordering dinner:
Me: You know there’s a goose in the drive-thru, right?
Panera worker: Yeah, he does that. His name is Jeff.
Me: You know there’s a goose in the drive-thru, right?
Panera worker: Yeah, he does that. His name is Jeff.
March 30, 2025 at 10:48 PM
Ordering dinner:
Me: You know there’s a goose in the drive-thru, right?
Panera worker: Yeah, he does that. His name is Jeff.
Me: You know there’s a goose in the drive-thru, right?
Panera worker: Yeah, he does that. His name is Jeff.
Can’t spell idea without DEI.
March 30, 2025 at 9:55 PM
Can’t spell idea without DEI.
You ever get the notification that it’s two of your not-as-close friends’ birthdays and then you immediately wonder if they are secretly the same person?
March 17, 2025 at 9:59 PM
You ever get the notification that it’s two of your not-as-close friends’ birthdays and then you immediately wonder if they are secretly the same person?
I don’t think they should allow two ads featuring Henry Winkler in a row. Even if one of the ads is just him voicing that Direct TV pigeon.
March 16, 2025 at 4:41 AM
I don’t think they should allow two ads featuring Henry Winkler in a row. Even if one of the ads is just him voicing that Direct TV pigeon.
I tried watching “Nosferatu” but it’s just way too…. Heterosexual. And I mean that as an insult.
March 1, 2025 at 10:26 PM
I tried watching “Nosferatu” but it’s just way too…. Heterosexual. And I mean that as an insult.
A friend of mine was escorted out of a hospital by security for “upsetting the other patients”. She had been telling them how they botched a routine surgery and subsequently how much her bills were.
February 27, 2025 at 4:18 AM
A friend of mine was escorted out of a hospital by security for “upsetting the other patients”. She had been telling them how they botched a routine surgery and subsequently how much her bills were.
I looked at the weather app and it’s -17🌡️. Wait, that’s not right, it’s set to Celcius not Fahrenheit. I get it switched over. It’s 1🌡️. Much better.
January 22, 2025 at 5:27 AM
I looked at the weather app and it’s -17🌡️. Wait, that’s not right, it’s set to Celcius not Fahrenheit. I get it switched over. It’s 1🌡️. Much better.
Reposted by Joshsplaining 🏳️⚧️
All jokes aside my heart goes out to everyone except for James Woods who is experiencing unimaginable loss during this time ❤️
January 9, 2025 at 11:28 PM
All jokes aside my heart goes out to everyone except for James Woods who is experiencing unimaginable loss during this time ❤️
Had a dream I went back to Japan as a teacher but then my mom visited and both myself and my mom had mental breakdowns and ended up in a Japanese mental health asylum and it was pretty nice except all of the food had either tentacles or offal in it. Anyway sounds about right.
January 10, 2025 at 12:33 AM
Had a dream I went back to Japan as a teacher but then my mom visited and both myself and my mom had mental breakdowns and ended up in a Japanese mental health asylum and it was pretty nice except all of the food had either tentacles or offal in it. Anyway sounds about right.
Reposted by Joshsplaining 🏳️⚧️
Possibly the best clap back against ignorant antivaxxers.
January 5, 2025 at 4:04 PM
Possibly the best clap back against ignorant antivaxxers.
Can anyone explain why the names Karl and Karla are really hot, and Carl and Carla really not hot whatsoever?
January 4, 2025 at 9:35 AM
Can anyone explain why the names Karl and Karla are really hot, and Carl and Carla really not hot whatsoever?
Hoping for a better 2025.
January 2, 2025 at 7:02 AM
Hoping for a better 2025.
@jendurbent.bsky.social hi happy new year! Thinking about you
January 1, 2025 at 6:23 AM
@jendurbent.bsky.social hi happy new year! Thinking about you
Elon chop chop get going to Mars alons-y
December 31, 2024 at 3:28 AM
Elon chop chop get going to Mars alons-y
Not sure if I should tell Meijer that in regard to the ramen in their vegan section, Tonkotsu means “pork bone”. Ingredient list confirmed pork and milk.
December 30, 2024 at 8:46 AM
Not sure if I should tell Meijer that in regard to the ramen in their vegan section, Tonkotsu means “pork bone”. Ingredient list confirmed pork and milk.
2:43 am thoughts… does the Hat Man count as a cryptid?
December 30, 2024 at 8:43 AM
2:43 am thoughts… does the Hat Man count as a cryptid?
Love this new hoodie
December 28, 2024 at 11:15 PM
Love this new hoodie
The regularity that firefighters come to my home to help with my mom who can’t walk is fairly lost on me. I really should get more pictures for my friends who think firefighters are hot.
December 28, 2024 at 11:10 PM
The regularity that firefighters come to my home to help with my mom who can’t walk is fairly lost on me. I really should get more pictures for my friends who think firefighters are hot.
Reposted by Joshsplaining 🏳️⚧️
Why would a person want to be the Joe Rogan of the left instead of being funny?
December 23, 2024 at 8:07 PM
Why would a person want to be the Joe Rogan of the left instead of being funny?
Throwback to the woman I overheard telling her relatives she couldn’t come home for Christmas because there’s a warrant out for her in TN and she’s worried her mom will rat her out.
December 26, 2024 at 4:43 AM
Throwback to the woman I overheard telling her relatives she couldn’t come home for Christmas because there’s a warrant out for her in TN and she’s worried her mom will rat her out.
This is definitely one of the worst Christmases I’ve ever had, but fingers crossed that it can only get better from here.
Highlight was me trying to watch the Beyonce halftime show and my mom complaining that Beyonce’s success must be based on the size of her thighs.
Highlight was me trying to watch the Beyonce halftime show and my mom complaining that Beyonce’s success must be based on the size of her thighs.
December 26, 2024 at 4:42 AM
This is definitely one of the worst Christmases I’ve ever had, but fingers crossed that it can only get better from here.
Highlight was me trying to watch the Beyonce halftime show and my mom complaining that Beyonce’s success must be based on the size of her thighs.
Highlight was me trying to watch the Beyonce halftime show and my mom complaining that Beyonce’s success must be based on the size of her thighs.
This album changed me deeply. Truly.
The best album of 2024 remains Cowboy Carter.
I said what I said.
I said what I said.
December 26, 2024 at 4:40 AM
This album changed me deeply. Truly.
Reposted by Joshsplaining 🏳️⚧️
The US has a long history of being scared of things they can't accurately define - gender, Communism, socialism, pornography... There should be a rule that if you can't discuss a topic eloquently and accurately for at least 5 minutes, you can't legislate on it.
December 23, 2024 at 9:43 PM
The US has a long history of being scared of things they can't accurately define - gender, Communism, socialism, pornography... There should be a rule that if you can't discuss a topic eloquently and accurately for at least 5 minutes, you can't legislate on it.
Note to myself: name memoir of my time in Japan “Trash Panda”
December 24, 2024 at 3:26 AM
Note to myself: name memoir of my time in Japan “Trash Panda”