@jedisexpest.bsky.social
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British people absolutely love saying it’s hotter than either Spain, Greece or Turkey.
April 30, 2025 at 6:28 PM
British people absolutely love saying it’s hotter than either Spain, Greece or Turkey.
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The post-bank holiday chat:
“Good bank holiday?”
“Yeah, not bad, quite quiet. You?”
“Yeah, it was nice, thanks, just saw the family. Ate a lot!”
“Same”
“Seemed to go by so quickly”
“Yeah… I keep thinking it’s Monday”
“At least it’s a short week”
“Good bank holiday?”
“Yeah, not bad, quite quiet. You?”
“Yeah, it was nice, thanks, just saw the family. Ate a lot!”
“Same”
“Seemed to go by so quickly”
“Yeah… I keep thinking it’s Monday”
“At least it’s a short week”
April 22, 2025 at 8:20 AM
The post-bank holiday chat:
“Good bank holiday?”
“Yeah, not bad, quite quiet. You?”
“Yeah, it was nice, thanks, just saw the family. Ate a lot!”
“Same”
“Seemed to go by so quickly”
“Yeah… I keep thinking it’s Monday”
“At least it’s a short week”
“Good bank holiday?”
“Yeah, not bad, quite quiet. You?”
“Yeah, it was nice, thanks, just saw the family. Ate a lot!”
“Same”
“Seemed to go by so quickly”
“Yeah… I keep thinking it’s Monday”
“At least it’s a short week”
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VOTING NOW OPEN
BEST ALT / ROCK ACT BRITS 2025
YOU CAN VOTE ONCE EVERY DAY FOR 2 WEEKS. 15 VOTES IN TOTAL
VOTE AT brits.lnk.to/vote
BEST ALT / ROCK ACT BRITS 2025
YOU CAN VOTE ONCE EVERY DAY FOR 2 WEEKS. 15 VOTES IN TOTAL
VOTE AT brits.lnk.to/vote
January 31, 2025 at 1:03 PM
VOTING NOW OPEN
BEST ALT / ROCK ACT BRITS 2025
YOU CAN VOTE ONCE EVERY DAY FOR 2 WEEKS. 15 VOTES IN TOTAL
VOTE AT brits.lnk.to/vote
BEST ALT / ROCK ACT BRITS 2025
YOU CAN VOTE ONCE EVERY DAY FOR 2 WEEKS. 15 VOTES IN TOTAL
VOTE AT brits.lnk.to/vote
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Today in 1856 the Victoria Cross was born, the UK's highest gallantry medal.
I was once lucky enough to hold two VCs. Both awarded during the Indian Rebellion/Mutiny/War of Independence of 1857. The security guard hovered close by!
I was once lucky enough to hold two VCs. Both awarded during the Indian Rebellion/Mutiny/War of Independence of 1857. The security guard hovered close by!
January 29, 2025 at 9:04 PM
Today in 1856 the Victoria Cross was born, the UK's highest gallantry medal.
I was once lucky enough to hold two VCs. Both awarded during the Indian Rebellion/Mutiny/War of Independence of 1857. The security guard hovered close by!
I was once lucky enough to hold two VCs. Both awarded during the Indian Rebellion/Mutiny/War of Independence of 1857. The security guard hovered close by!
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Dame Elizabeth Taylor 1955 by Frank Worth
January 29, 2025 at 11:21 AM
Dame Elizabeth Taylor 1955 by Frank Worth
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Meanings of “that went well”
1. That went as well as I hoped
2. That went slightly better than expected
3. It went pretty badly but it’s fine
4. I didn’t really notice how it went
5. Couldn’t have gone worse really
6. No one died
1. That went as well as I hoped
2. That went slightly better than expected
3. It went pretty badly but it’s fine
4. I didn’t really notice how it went
5. Couldn’t have gone worse really
6. No one died
January 29, 2025 at 8:29 PM
Meanings of “that went well”
1. That went as well as I hoped
2. That went slightly better than expected
3. It went pretty badly but it’s fine
4. I didn’t really notice how it went
5. Couldn’t have gone worse really
6. No one died
1. That went as well as I hoped
2. That went slightly better than expected
3. It went pretty badly but it’s fine
4. I didn’t really notice how it went
5. Couldn’t have gone worse really
6. No one died
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Boys Don't Crochet
January 16, 2025 at 9:31 AM
Boys Don't Crochet
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One minute you’re young and wild, the next you’re declining an invitation to sit on a beanbag because “I won’t be able to get up again!”
January 16, 2025 at 12:09 PM
One minute you’re young and wild, the next you’re declining an invitation to sit on a beanbag because “I won’t be able to get up again!”
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Making sure to read the specials board out loud, so the couple dining below it don't think you're just having a good stare at them.
January 14, 2025 at 10:56 AM
Making sure to read the specials board out loud, so the couple dining below it don't think you're just having a good stare at them.
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Pretty snowed in here. Guess I’ll just have to cancel all plans and stay on the sofa this weekend. #arcticblast
January 4, 2025 at 10:00 AM
Pretty snowed in here. Guess I’ll just have to cancel all plans and stay on the sofa this weekend. #arcticblast
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18.24 and I still haven't had my Christmas 🎄 wank 🤣
December 25, 2024 at 6:25 PM
18.24 and I still haven't had my Christmas 🎄 wank 🤣
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Nobody in Britain can believe it’s Christmas next week.
December 17, 2024 at 10:58 AM
Nobody in Britain can believe it’s Christmas next week.
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Happy Friday The 13th 🪓
Keep calm!!
Don't go swimming
Don't have sex
Don't smoke
Don't drink
Don't go out
Don't split up
Don't run from the killed
If you trip, get back up and hide
And above all!!
Turn on the stupid light before entering a room
#JasonVoorhees
#FridayThe13th
Keep calm!!
Don't go swimming
Don't have sex
Don't smoke
Don't drink
Don't go out
Don't split up
Don't run from the killed
If you trip, get back up and hide
And above all!!
Turn on the stupid light before entering a room
#JasonVoorhees
#FridayThe13th
December 13, 2024 at 11:53 AM
Happy Friday The 13th 🪓
Keep calm!!
Don't go swimming
Don't have sex
Don't smoke
Don't drink
Don't go out
Don't split up
Don't run from the killed
If you trip, get back up and hide
And above all!!
Turn on the stupid light before entering a room
#JasonVoorhees
#FridayThe13th
Keep calm!!
Don't go swimming
Don't have sex
Don't smoke
Don't drink
Don't go out
Don't split up
Don't run from the killed
If you trip, get back up and hide
And above all!!
Turn on the stupid light before entering a room
#JasonVoorhees
#FridayThe13th
December 12, 2024 at 12:50 AM
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Could two followers please copy and re-post this tweet to show that someone is always there?
National Suicide Prevention Hotline
Call: 0800 689 5652 (UK)
1-800-273-8255 (USA)
1.833.456.4566 (Canada)
Copy... not retweet
National Suicide Prevention Hotline
Call: 0800 689 5652 (UK)
1-800-273-8255 (USA)
1.833.456.4566 (Canada)
Copy... not retweet
December 6, 2024 at 6:15 PM
Could two followers please copy and re-post this tweet to show that someone is always there?
National Suicide Prevention Hotline
Call: 0800 689 5652 (UK)
1-800-273-8255 (USA)
1.833.456.4566 (Canada)
Copy... not retweet
National Suicide Prevention Hotline
Call: 0800 689 5652 (UK)
1-800-273-8255 (USA)
1.833.456.4566 (Canada)
Copy... not retweet
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Time spent locating items in supermarket: 5 minutes
Time spent pretending to look at things you don't need while someone gets out of the way: 57 minutes
Time spent pretending to look at things you don't need while someone gets out of the way: 57 minutes
December 3, 2024 at 12:45 PM
Time spent locating items in supermarket: 5 minutes
Time spent pretending to look at things you don't need while someone gets out of the way: 57 minutes
Time spent pretending to look at things you don't need while someone gets out of the way: 57 minutes
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Your decorators were so preoccupied with whether or not they COULD put Christmas lights on palm trees, they didn't stop to think if they SHOULD put Christmas lights on palm trees.🎄
December 2, 2024 at 10:53 AM
Your decorators were so preoccupied with whether or not they COULD put Christmas lights on palm trees, they didn't stop to think if they SHOULD put Christmas lights on palm trees.🎄
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