Gabe Utseks
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jawnwicks.bsky.social
Gabe Utseks
@jawnwicks.bsky.social
43 followers 100 following 350 posts
I sit at home watching panel shows and foam at the mouth | UK | 30s
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jawnwicks.bsky.social
When you show your bearded dragon a particularly tasty-looking leaf:
Mark Watson stood in some kind of park, with his mouth open and an alarmed slash excited look on his face, as he addresses the leaves in front of him.
November 24, 2025 at 3:55 AM
jawnwicks.bsky.social
I've got their catalogue!
A photo of a hand holding a glossy booklet entitled PATERSON: Darkroom Equipment. The colour theme is red and black and it is only slightly clear that it is, in fact, about camera darkrooms rather than the gay sauna kind.
November 17, 2025 at 1:57 PM
jawnwicks.bsky.social
Greg Davies on his Taskmaster throne, with a very serious expression on his face as he holds up a card that says, "WIBBLE. BIBBLE. BAM." Phil Ellis, dressed like a pirate, with his hands on his hips and looking very pleased. Off screen, Greg Davies addresses him as, "You soft-haired lovely." Greg Davies and Alex Horne holding each other as they jump in place, as the Taskmaster finale credits roll. 150+ new messages since 23:59 on 13 November 2025. Because fans never miss.
November 14, 2025 at 9:28 AM
jawnwicks.bsky.social
Ania Magliano holds a tube in her mouth while cracking up at the camera, as Alex Horne says, "Wrong? That's one second of squirting." Sanjeev Bhaskar, dressed as a pirate, saying, "Couldn't give a shit!" Reece Shearsmith, wearing some kind of rubber nose on his nose and covered in tubes, saying, "This is good, the tables have turned." Like he's got the upper hand in dignity here. Alex Horne losing it laughing at the ridiculousness of this task.
November 14, 2025 at 9:18 AM
jawnwicks.bsky.social
The #Taskmaster finale, in pictures:
Phil Ellis, dressed as a pirate and looking like an undyed Noel Fielding, holding up a bottle of lube. Maisie Adam on her hands and knees in the Taskmaster lab, in front of a grey cat litter tray with apple juice in it. Looking defeated. Reece Shearsmith supping apple juice from beneath a table. Phil Ellis, wearing Alex's old many-pockets jacket with tons of hoses sticking out from said pockets, saying "That was my penis."
November 14, 2025 at 9:07 AM
jawnwicks.bsky.social
Without downloading any new pics, describe your gender
A simple black and white doodle of a puppy who is looking sidelong at the camera with big puppy eyes. Four screencaps of Ivo Graham putting his face in his hand/s on Taskmaster. Text on top reads: "Anxiety-ridden man rightly ashamed of every single thing he does." Screencap of Mike Wozniak on Taskmaster during his solo task "Fart. Fastest time wins." He's on a private jet, sitting on the floor with his head against the seat of one chair and his feet against the seat of the one opposite. His knees are right up by his shoulders and he's got his hands interlinked around his lower legs. He looks miserable.
November 13, 2025 at 12:12 PM
jawnwicks.bsky.social
no... I shan't say it.... no.....
Alex Horne keeping his mouth firmly shut.
November 13, 2025 at 10:37 AM
jawnwicks.bsky.social
That's what I hear.
#Taskmaster
NOTHING STRAIGHT CAN BE FASHIONED from this crooked ass wood Made using: https://homes.luddy.indiana.edu/ccshan/for/for.html
November 9, 2025 at 12:42 PM
jawnwicks.bsky.social
E T forn hom Made using: https://homes.luddy.indiana.edu/ccshan/for/for.html
November 9, 2025 at 5:54 AM
jawnwicks.bsky.social
I for gor Made using: https://homes.luddy.indiana.edu/ccshan/for/for.html
November 9, 2025 at 5:53 AM
jawnwicks.bsky.social
A screencap of Greg Davies in series five of Taskmaster, saying "Who loses their fucking trousers?"
November 4, 2025 at 1:06 AM
jawnwicks.bsky.social
judge as ye wish:
Screencap of a spotify playlist, titled "australian, indie, easy listening, tuesday late night". Eleven songs are pictured: Come on Mess Me Up by Cub Sport; Sentimental and Monday by Holy Holy; Time is Dancing by Ben Howard; Dream Cave by Cloud Control; Heaven Up There by Palace; Blood Bank by Bon Iver; Don't Know How To Keep Loving You by Julia Jacklin; Open Season by High Highs; Stand in Line by BANFF; Perfectly Out Of Place by Dreams We've Had; Lilo by The Japanese House.
October 29, 2025 at 1:53 AM
jawnwicks.bsky.social
Not sated by influencing my writing, @kim-tey.bsky.social is now even influencing my tunes. 🇦🇺
Screencap of a Spotify Daylist title and description. It reads: "Public playlist. Australian, indie, easy listening, Tuesday late night. Here's some Australian, indie, easy listening, mellow, relaxing, coastal, van life - inspired by your listening on Tuesdays late at night." Below that, it says: "Spotify. Fifty songs, about three hours forty-five minutes, next update at 04:43."
October 29, 2025 at 1:47 AM
jawnwicks.bsky.social
Hmm, could go with a whimsical Jammie Dodgers one instead then? 🫶
A bunch of jammie dodgers: a round biscuit made up of two layers with a heart-shaped cut-out in the middle, filled with jam.
October 28, 2025 at 2:39 AM
jawnwicks.bsky.social
Big fan of this combo:
A Google Street View shot of the corner of a pub. A large sign indicates that the pub is called "THE BELL". It also says "car park at rear", lol. Beneath that, a sign tells us that the street name itself is "Cock Road". This sign isn't visible on any newer dates, suggesting that the sign keeps being stolen (which is true).
October 26, 2025 at 3:02 AM
jawnwicks.bsky.social
It is said that if you look at this sad little Qrs screencap seven times, he will reappear in a future task.
Alex Horne, as Qrs Tuvwxyz, lies in the bed of the Taskmaster caravan, looking despondently out of the window. He's wearing a white flannel dressing gown and is next to a big, black and white, stuffed toy tiger. Alex does something with his face, voice and body language this whole episode that completely transforms him into Qrs and it's an outrage that they've never returned.
October 19, 2025 at 7:34 AM
jawnwicks.bsky.social
have a shitty recorded version! <3
October 4, 2025 at 4:45 PM
jawnwicks.bsky.social
Got my grapes but no olives. Nasty little oliveses.
A photo of a carton of grapes with a TV in the background showing Taskmaster. One of my dogs is lying on a chair to the left.
October 2, 2025 at 8:19 PM
jawnwicks.bsky.social
Just the realest talk of the day.
The first two panels of a meme from 2015, altered to be relevant to this user's interests. First panel is a close-up of a creature with the head of a human surrounded by flower petals. It reads: "nnnhhhggg. im a thirsty little flower. you have to water me. you have to reopen your cameo videos." Second panel shows the flower creature on its hands and knees in front of two stick figures, one looking confused/appalled (labelled Alex) and one looking surprised/confused (labelled Greg).
September 30, 2025 at 1:09 PM
jawnwicks.bsky.social
A poem by Joseph Fasano. It reads: I was young, once; I wanted a world other than this one. Now I look up into the starlight and see fires that will not come again, love, the body's story that cannot be revisited. Your absence clambers out of me from the crossing like horses through the thorn along some shore.
September 30, 2025 at 9:23 AM
jawnwicks.bsky.social
Age yourself with a movie you saw in a theater as a kid.
A still from Pokemon: The First Movie. Mewtwo and mew hover high above a blue arena, looking down at pokemon fighting their clones.
September 29, 2025 at 10:29 PM
jawnwicks.bsky.social
I did not write today. But I did THINK about writing. Which, if you think about it, is about 30-40% of writing. So really I accomplished something here.
A photo of shiba inu looking towards the camera and smiling awkwardly. It gives the impression that the author's point is pretty feeble.
September 28, 2025 at 9:10 AM
jawnwicks.bsky.social
Genuinely pisses me off how well ads know my ideal clickbait.
Screenshot of an advert on Facebook. The brand is Cool Shirtz. The description say: "We are no longer peeing on the shirts..." and is cut off there. The shirt on display is a pale pink tshirt with a white toy rabbit graphic on the front, holding a rifle. It says "I hate the government" on it.
September 27, 2025 at 8:12 AM
jawnwicks.bsky.social
Much to discuss, including whether Greg is a rare male red roo with a pouch (that he uses to transport/hold Alex ofc), or alternatively, whether he keeps Alex in a handmade fleece pouch attached to his throne.
A baby wallaby contentedly tucked into a manmade fabric pouch, which is hanging from the arm of a computer chair.
September 27, 2025 at 7:33 AM
jawnwicks.bsky.social
Silly thought that has been consuming braincells for the last several hours: what if Taskmaster but everyone is an Australian animal?

@kim-tey.bsky.social suggested Red Kangaroo for Greg and Yellow-Footed Rock Wallaby for Alex and they work... oddly well.
A photo of a red kangaroo lying on the dusty ground, with its weight resting on its left elbow as it leans over that way, in a manner oddly reminiscent of Greg Davies on his throne. Speech: "So what have we learned today, Alex?" Photo of a rock wallaby sitting on its haunches and looking at a photoshopped-in iPad in its hands, in a manner oddly reminiscent of Alex Horne. Speech: "Well, Greg, you scary beautiful man..."
September 27, 2025 at 7:30 AM