Jordan
@iliterate.bsky.social
white sox fan. professional yapper. librarian. not insane at all. sanest man to ever live. 25. https://open.substack.com/pub/jordangrasnowski
Pinned
Save us Tim Elko Tim Elko Save us Please
April 27, 2025 at 9:45 PM
Save us Tim Elko Tim Elko Save us Please
chris getz is keeping tim elko in triple a because he’s giving time for a lisan al-gaib like legend to be created in the city of chicago about this poor guy
April 27, 2025 at 9:45 PM
chris getz is keeping tim elko in triple a because he’s giving time for a lisan al-gaib like legend to be created in the city of chicago about this poor guy
andrew vaughn might go down as my least favorite player ever. high draft pick. below average defensively. slow. bad hitter. short. ugly. dumb. negative swag. probably bad politics. as i typed this i realized that i actually hate him. it’s personal
April 27, 2025 at 9:38 PM
andrew vaughn might go down as my least favorite player ever. high draft pick. below average defensively. slow. bad hitter. short. ugly. dumb. negative swag. probably bad politics. as i typed this i realized that i actually hate him. it’s personal
just found out this pic used on tiktok all the time is of a guy named Roland the Farter. his thing was he farted for King Henry II. what do i do with this information. i’m freaking out
April 26, 2025 at 11:18 PM
just found out this pic used on tiktok all the time is of a guy named Roland the Farter. his thing was he farted for King Henry II. what do i do with this information. i’m freaking out
stop talking shit about little caesars. elitist nonsense. if you don’t like it you’ve never had it at your divorced dads apartment when you were 9. nothing like it
April 26, 2025 at 2:38 AM
stop talking shit about little caesars. elitist nonsense. if you don’t like it you’ve never had it at your divorced dads apartment when you were 9. nothing like it
i’m about to start a substack like an absolute loser. therapist says i have to “regain my sense of self” by “reclaiming my passion for writing.” god i hate this fucking piece of shit. what a fucking tool . making me do shit. (hes completely in the right and i owe him my life)
April 26, 2025 at 12:59 AM
i’m about to start a substack like an absolute loser. therapist says i have to “regain my sense of self” by “reclaiming my passion for writing.” god i hate this fucking piece of shit. what a fucking tool . making me do shit. (hes completely in the right and i owe him my life)
i hate the “this is how you age when you’re unproblematic” tweets about some beautiful celebrity. wrong. there’s so much evil in the world u have to face and engage with and stand up to. if you’re a good person by 28 you should have a thousand yard stare and bags under your eyes
April 19, 2025 at 10:55 PM
i hate the “this is how you age when you’re unproblematic” tweets about some beautiful celebrity. wrong. there’s so much evil in the world u have to face and engage with and stand up to. if you’re a good person by 28 you should have a thousand yard stare and bags under your eyes
every time i see a jonathan cannon sweeper:
March 29, 2025 at 6:43 PM
every time i see a jonathan cannon sweeper:
just dropped 20 dollars to watch jonathan cannon go 2 1/3 innings, andrew benintendi strike out 3 times and brooks baldwin run through the fence in right
March 29, 2025 at 5:35 PM
just dropped 20 dollars to watch jonathan cannon go 2 1/3 innings, andrew benintendi strike out 3 times and brooks baldwin run through the fence in right
i’m doing the thing where i just sit and wait for a chicago white sox game to start. that’s when my day starts. which has to be a top 5 most unhealthy ways to live. right up there with heroin addiction
March 29, 2025 at 4:41 PM
i’m doing the thing where i just sit and wait for a chicago white sox game to start. that’s when my day starts. which has to be a top 5 most unhealthy ways to live. right up there with heroin addiction
clifford is too big. he cannot function in our society . he must be put down
March 27, 2025 at 12:32 AM
clifford is too big. he cannot function in our society . he must be put down
2023 me when it came to being told i’m developing liver disease at 23 years old:
March 25, 2025 at 1:18 AM
2023 me when it came to being told i’m developing liver disease at 23 years old:
yea i need to give myself pats on the back every once and a while for motivation. but its a genuinely funny experience to go through your camera roll and be like “yea i look like shit here. posting it.”
March 25, 2025 at 1:00 AM
yea i need to give myself pats on the back every once and a while for motivation. but its a genuinely funny experience to go through your camera roll and be like “yea i look like shit here. posting it.”
Folks: We Are Down One Hundred (100) Pounds (lbs) Today
March 25, 2025 at 12:59 AM
Folks: We Are Down One Hundred (100) Pounds (lbs) Today
84 year old boss just called me a “social bowling ball”
March 21, 2025 at 3:53 PM
84 year old boss just called me a “social bowling ball”
saying this if he does catch fire and figures it out he’s by default my favorite player ever due to his overcoming the insurmountable. which is weird vibes
the thing about andrew vaughn is that he doesn’t pass the boomer test at all. not a chance in the world i can see success for him at the big league level. 6 foot first basemen who looks 5’10. bad build. no eyebrows. odd aura. weird vibes. it’s just not working for me
March 4, 2025 at 5:32 PM
saying this if he does catch fire and figures it out he’s by default my favorite player ever due to his overcoming the insurmountable. which is weird vibes
the thing about andrew vaughn is that he doesn’t pass the boomer test at all. not a chance in the world i can see success for him at the big league level. 6 foot first basemen who looks 5’10. bad build. no eyebrows. odd aura. weird vibes. it’s just not working for me
March 4, 2025 at 5:31 PM
the thing about andrew vaughn is that he doesn’t pass the boomer test at all. not a chance in the world i can see success for him at the big league level. 6 foot first basemen who looks 5’10. bad build. no eyebrows. odd aura. weird vibes. it’s just not working for me
Reposted by Jordan
The jerk store called. They voted 11-3 to unionize! Everyone welcome Jerks Local 217
March 2, 2025 at 2:04 AM
The jerk store called. They voted 11-3 to unionize! Everyone welcome Jerks Local 217
my friends: bro where have u been i haven’t heard from u in forever
where ive been:
where ive been:
March 2, 2025 at 4:37 PM
my friends: bro where have u been i haven’t heard from u in forever
where ive been:
where ive been:
coworker failed talking stage to wandering the desert looking for hope and wisdom pipeline
March 2, 2025 at 4:18 PM
coworker failed talking stage to wandering the desert looking for hope and wisdom pipeline
you’re gonna meet a nice girl one day and then she’s gonna see that you have a twitter account where you tweet about the chicago white sox every day and then that nice girl is going to murder you with poison
March 2, 2025 at 4:06 PM
you’re gonna meet a nice girl one day and then she’s gonna see that you have a twitter account where you tweet about the chicago white sox every day and then that nice girl is going to murder you with poison
you’ll never guess what’s happening rn
this is the first white sox game i’ve watched this year and all im saying is these boys are swinging it
March 1, 2025 at 11:17 PM
you’ll never guess what’s happening rn
Reposted by Jordan
me: i hate the united states of america
me when asked about the city of chicago:
me when asked about the city of chicago:
March 1, 2025 at 8:55 PM
me: i hate the united states of america
me when asked about the city of chicago:
me when asked about the city of chicago:
this is the first white sox game i’ve watched this year and all im saying is these boys are swinging it
March 1, 2025 at 9:02 PM
this is the first white sox game i’ve watched this year and all im saying is these boys are swinging it
i’m going to hang that shirtless picture of ripped luis robert jr that blew up when we first signed him on my ceiling like WWII GI’s used to do with Rita Hayworth
March 1, 2025 at 8:53 PM
i’m going to hang that shirtless picture of ripped luis robert jr that blew up when we first signed him on my ceiling like WWII GI’s used to do with Rita Hayworth