The Houston Astros are calling up pitcher Jason Alexander for tonight's game against the A's:

www.chron.com/sports/astro...

elrond (front) and megatron (back) in their jc penny portrait studios photo
(this is an older photo but i finally downloaded this app onto my new phone)

*a guy on the highway cuts me off so I look away from the road to navigate menus to try to type “1337” (gamer reference) to open my glovebox; I drift into oncoming traffic and collide with a Boar’s Head® delivery truck, giving my burning wreck the savory aroma of PitCraft® Slow Smoked Turkey Breast*

do you ever meet a creature and know instantly you would die for it

there difference of Vibe in these two photos is hilarious lmao, ellie has never had an actual thought in his short life so he for sure isn't pondering anything and meg is no doubt actually plotting something pretty evil despite how idyllic she presents

this place needs glamour… I’m sorry…

The story of the first Bluesky users is the story of a lonely person who finds a genie and the first wish is to have friends and the second wish is to become a warlord of some sort

DAMB - dashare.zone ADMIN

people saying, "we didn't have trigger warnings in my day", you had an entire Hays Code from 1934 to 1968 straight up banning movies named after a Republican politician. Every modern movie comes with an MPA label listing your content warnings right there.

me: “hey is there any storage on this plane”

femboy flight attendant:

If Daft Punk can wear a mask for 28 years surely you can wear one to buy tomatoes

hi, i exist here now too. curse my need for some form of internet social activity