Heather Woodward
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heatherwoodward.bsky.social
Heather Woodward
@heatherwoodward.bsky.social
Writer for Infinity Ward - Former Apex Legends, writer behind: SPARROW 🇮🇹
(+ Revenant Reborn - Altered Horizons - a million other in-game things)
#GDC2025
Comedian, Actress, Singer and Planet of the Apes Enthusiast

All opinions here are my own
This is exactly what I would pay for a butt bag
December 13, 2025 at 5:12 PM
I mean would these not have looked better with heads?!

This country is falling apart.
December 7, 2025 at 9:30 PM
Something crazy is happening, we keep running into all these faceless pictures and cut outs. So weird.
December 7, 2025 at 9:18 PM
Spooky nails #3 are really testing the limits of my left hand’s skills (not pictured)

#nailart
October 28, 2025 at 6:16 PM
2nd spooky nails of the season, with a color changing purple-black base
October 23, 2025 at 10:02 PM
Lastly, it's set in the Simpson's living room bc I'm a die-hard fan and made everyone put up with my endless references. For example, I thought it was important that we establish what Duardo looked like without his trademark glasses and this is what I made:
October 13, 2025 at 8:17 PM
The card is bc I started the joke that Kill Code 4 took place on Octane's bday. He kept getting jerked around by his friends, disrespected by his (grand)dad, and then watched him get murdered. When we were working on that video I kept pitching that Octane screams, "THIS IS THE WORST BIRTHDAY EVER."
October 13, 2025 at 8:15 PM
Revenant's eye is on the table bc I wrote Kill Code Part 2, the "Revenant Reborn" video seen through his loose eyeball. When I handed in a draft that flipped between different Rev POV's in different places, I was sure I would be told to change it and simplify. They let me be crazy and I love them.
October 13, 2025 at 8:08 PM
My wonderful former Narrative team at Apex Legends had this commissioned for me by the incredible @vinegarandsoda.bsky.social , one of my favorite comic artist's we've worked with. My heart is exploding. 🧵Here's an explanation of what's in the pic: 🧵

#apexlegendscommunity
#apexlegendsfanart
October 13, 2025 at 7:59 PM
Got caught looking way cooler at work than I ever have looked in person
October 7, 2025 at 5:07 PM
First spooky nails of the season and yes they glow 👻
October 6, 2025 at 7:16 PM
Okay you know what
I come to work to write battle chatter and action stories, not to get SPOOKED OUT OF MY FREAKING GOURD
October 2, 2025 at 8:08 PM
This is about as specific and correct the algorithm could possibly be about me

#korn
October 1, 2025 at 11:44 PM
The antagonists in “One Battle After Another” are white supremacy and Sean Penn’s arm veins
October 1, 2025 at 3:06 AM
Celebrated 20 years of #callofduty today even though for me personally it’s closer to 20 days

#infinityward
September 24, 2025 at 12:30 AM
Fr this coincidence has chilled me to my niche esoteric core

#dorothyparker
September 15, 2025 at 5:43 PM
Obsessed with the absolute shade of referring to Giuliani as “Former Masked Singer contestant”
September 1, 2025 at 3:11 AM
hi I’m on Letterboxd now too
August 28, 2025 at 6:24 AM
Turned a corner at work and got absolutely jump-scared by this guy

#callofduty #callofdutyghost
August 21, 2025 at 9:05 PM
This is the most trivial possible response to the Kennedy Center honorees but… We’re going with “comedian” for Michael Crawford’s headline?
August 13, 2025 at 5:52 PM
NEW GIG 🫡
I now go by “Heather Infinity-Wood-Ward”

#infinityward #narrativewriter
August 11, 2025 at 10:53 PM
I can’t believe the plot of “I Know What You Did Last Summer” is about a bunch of murders and not about the world’s worst shake-and-go wig
August 5, 2025 at 5:55 PM
I’d watch #thenakedgun 100 more times this weekend if I could.
GODTDAMN THIS WAS FUNNY
August 1, 2025 at 11:17 PM
The Italian name for Zootopia is “Zootropolis” and IDK I just love that
July 30, 2025 at 8:56 PM
Watched about 20 min of DROP and already know that piano player in the restaurant is a murderer.

He’s not THE murderer, I’m just confident that guy has committed several unrelated murders.
July 29, 2025 at 8:32 PM