Happy
@happyst.bsky.social
Chicago sports fan. Formerly of Uproxx.
Nothing you read from me will have been worth your time. Also, for the first week I was here I thought “Bluesky” rhymed with “brewski.”
Nothing you read from me will have been worth your time. Also, for the first week I was here I thought “Bluesky” rhymed with “brewski.”
His “concepts of a plan” were always “fuck everyone except me, my rich friends, and people who want nothing more than to be my rich friend.”
November 10, 2025 at 3:28 PM
His “concepts of a plan” were always “fuck everyone except me, my rich friends, and people who want nothing more than to be my rich friend.”
When the United States’ version of the Nuremberg trials finally get underway, put this motherfucker near the top of the list. Say his name. Charles Exum. Absolute piece of shit, this guy.
November 6, 2025 at 2:10 PM
When the United States’ version of the Nuremberg trials finally get underway, put this motherfucker near the top of the list. Say his name. Charles Exum. Absolute piece of shit, this guy.
The Bulls came back and won after being down by 26. And the parts of the country that had a voice today spoke up and said fuck you to Donald Trump and everything he stands for.
Pretty decent night.
Pretty decent night.
November 5, 2025 at 3:54 AM
The Bulls came back and won after being down by 26. And the parts of the country that had a voice today spoke up and said fuck you to Donald Trump and everything he stands for.
Pretty decent night.
Pretty decent night.
I feel like Apple developers have run out of ways to improve on their devices so now they spend their time giving us solutions for problems that don’t exist or problems we could not have imagined giving a shit about.
I’m also pretty sure autocorrect has gone backwards the last two iOS upgrades.
I’m also pretty sure autocorrect has gone backwards the last two iOS upgrades.
November 3, 2025 at 6:14 PM
I feel like Apple developers have run out of ways to improve on their devices so now they spend their time giving us solutions for problems that don’t exist or problems we could not have imagined giving a shit about.
I’m also pretty sure autocorrect has gone backwards the last two iOS upgrades.
I’m also pretty sure autocorrect has gone backwards the last two iOS upgrades.
I’m still standing. Yeah yeah yeah!
November 3, 2025 at 3:01 PM
I’m still standing. Yeah yeah yeah!
JB Pritzker every time he goes on TV and talks about Trump or Vance…
October 13, 2025 at 9:05 PM
JB Pritzker every time he goes on TV and talks about Trump or Vance…
I went an entire college football Saturday without watching ESPN. It wasn’t even that hard. Folks we can do this!
Hit ‘em where it hits the hardest.
Hit ‘em where it hits the hardest.
September 21, 2025 at 2:41 AM
I went an entire college football Saturday without watching ESPN. It wasn’t even that hard. Folks we can do this!
Hit ‘em where it hits the hardest.
Hit ‘em where it hits the hardest.
Cancelled my Disney+, Hulu, and ESPN subscription. My “feedback” was “fuck you, you fascist cunts.” I feel better.
September 17, 2025 at 11:43 PM
Cancelled my Disney+, Hulu, and ESPN subscription. My “feedback” was “fuck you, you fascist cunts.” I feel better.
I want to meet Walton Goggins so I can tell him “I loved you in Major League: Back To The Minors.”
September 15, 2025 at 1:10 AM
I want to meet Walton Goggins so I can tell him “I loved you in Major League: Back To The Minors.”
I just lowered the flag at my house to half staff for 9/11. I feel like I want to put up a sign next to it that says “Not For Charlie”
September 11, 2025 at 1:45 PM
I just lowered the flag at my house to half staff for 9/11. I feel like I want to put up a sign next to it that says “Not For Charlie”
Oh like you haven’t given a friend a birthday card in the shape of a woman and used veiled language to make it seem but not seem like you’re a serial rapist and also signed your name to make it look like pubes.
The lengths some of you will go to contrive controversy.
The lengths some of you will go to contrive controversy.
September 8, 2025 at 7:32 PM
Oh like you haven’t given a friend a birthday card in the shape of a woman and used veiled language to make it seem but not seem like you’re a serial rapist and also signed your name to make it look like pubes.
The lengths some of you will go to contrive controversy.
The lengths some of you will go to contrive controversy.
I like how simply saying the day of the week is a perfectly reasonable response to someone asking how you’re doing.
Eh it’s Tuesday.
It’s Thursday, not bad!
Eh. Monday.
Hey it’s Friday!!!
It’s Wednesday, halfway there.
Eh it’s Tuesday.
It’s Thursday, not bad!
Eh. Monday.
Hey it’s Friday!!!
It’s Wednesday, halfway there.
August 13, 2025 at 11:18 PM
I like how simply saying the day of the week is a perfectly reasonable response to someone asking how you’re doing.
Eh it’s Tuesday.
It’s Thursday, not bad!
Eh. Monday.
Hey it’s Friday!!!
It’s Wednesday, halfway there.
Eh it’s Tuesday.
It’s Thursday, not bad!
Eh. Monday.
Hey it’s Friday!!!
It’s Wednesday, halfway there.
We should really stop saying “he said the quiet part out loud.” It’s not a quiet part if these racist fucks are always saying it.
August 5, 2025 at 5:25 PM
We should really stop saying “he said the quiet part out loud.” It’s not a quiet part if these racist fucks are always saying it.
I must be from New England because I…
Bought Some Massive Glue Sets.
Bought Some Massive Glue Sets.
July 28, 2025 at 11:36 PM
I must be from New England because I…
Bought Some Massive Glue Sets.
Bought Some Massive Glue Sets.
Which concert would you rather go to? Styx opening for The Rolling Stones for the Styx and Stones concert? Or Phish opening for Styx for the PhishStix concert?
July 9, 2025 at 10:54 PM
Which concert would you rather go to? Styx opening for The Rolling Stones for the Styx and Stones concert? Or Phish opening for Styx for the PhishStix concert?
The president out here casually inventing a new form of citizenship. It hasn’t been done around these parts since the mid 1860s or so but worth trying again he supposes.
July 2, 2025 at 8:51 PM
The president out here casually inventing a new form of citizenship. It hasn’t been done around these parts since the mid 1860s or so but worth trying again he supposes.
I feel like I’m taking crazy pills while reading this article about Will Leitch’s new book. The book has a nearly identical plot to Short Time, a 1990 Dabney Coleman movie. Now I get it, I’m the only person who ever saw that movie. Doesn’t mean it didn’t exist.
deadline.com/2025/04/lion...
deadline.com/2025/04/lion...
July 1, 2025 at 7:15 PM
I feel like I’m taking crazy pills while reading this article about Will Leitch’s new book. The book has a nearly identical plot to Short Time, a 1990 Dabney Coleman movie. Now I get it, I’m the only person who ever saw that movie. Doesn’t mean it didn’t exist.
deadline.com/2025/04/lion...
deadline.com/2025/04/lion...
I feel like there’s a little bit of a letdown for Day 2 or the NBA draft every year. If it were me I would hold the second round first and save the first round for today. It would add some build up to the top pick IMO.
June 26, 2025 at 5:31 PM
I feel like there’s a little bit of a letdown for Day 2 or the NBA draft every year. If it were me I would hold the second round first and save the first round for today. It would add some build up to the top pick IMO.
Today is the day donald trump finally became thank you for your attention to this matter.
June 23, 2025 at 8:19 PM
Today is the day donald trump finally became thank you for your attention to this matter.
Are we really supposed to believe James Caan remembered to bring Joe Kane’s motorcycle keys with him before the last game of the season and kept them in his pocket that whole time? Piss off with that nonsense.
June 23, 2025 at 4:43 PM
Are we really supposed to believe James Caan remembered to bring Joe Kane’s motorcycle keys with him before the last game of the season and kept them in his pocket that whole time? Piss off with that nonsense.
I went to a wedding last weekend and cut in front of a bunch of people who were standing in line for sangria. When someone called me on it I was like, hey quit your whining.
No wait that’s not it.
Damn it I ruined the punchline.
No wait that’s not it.
Damn it I ruined the punchline.
June 19, 2025 at 10:02 PM
I went to a wedding last weekend and cut in front of a bunch of people who were standing in line for sangria. When someone called me on it I was like, hey quit your whining.
No wait that’s not it.
Damn it I ruined the punchline.
No wait that’s not it.
Damn it I ruined the punchline.
Give me your Mt Rushmore of Mt Rushmores. For me it has to be greatest basketball players of all time, best standup comedians, best quarterbacks, and maybe American Presidents.
May 23, 2025 at 6:07 PM
Give me your Mt Rushmore of Mt Rushmores. For me it has to be greatest basketball players of all time, best standup comedians, best quarterbacks, and maybe American Presidents.
Juno and Bleeker’s baby is old enough to vote.
April 22, 2025 at 10:54 PM
Juno and Bleeker’s baby is old enough to vote.
Michael Taylor of the White Sox is hitting .184. That was good for fourth best in the starting lineup today.
April 17, 2025 at 8:51 PM
Michael Taylor of the White Sox is hitting .184. That was good for fourth best in the starting lineup today.
Patrick Reed’s tan line makes his head look like a bobber.
April 13, 2025 at 10:54 PM
Patrick Reed’s tan line makes his head look like a bobber.