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hagen-patrick.bsky.social
Hagen Patrick
@hagen-patrick.bsky.social
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hagen-patrick.bsky.social
Last minutes of the Trump administration: Donald Trump is sitting in an overpriced lawn chair on the Rose Garden Patio with a bag of McDonalds cheeseburgers in one hand and a Trump Pistol™ in the other. The pistol, adorned with Don Jr. on the barrel and Eric on the butt, reflects the dying sunlight in its cheap chrome plating. His lieutenants in jail, his legacy tied to a failed economy and pedophilia, and his favorite news channels abandoning him for legal security, Trump contemplates the dim future and puts another cheeseburger in his mouth. His latest Secretary of State, Kid Rock, walks onto the patio to gently encourage him to come inside before the DC police arrive. Trump chews thoughtlessly, brings the pistol up to point it at Kid Rock, and fires. The pistol—hastily assembled in a country he tariffed exorbitantly not long ago—explodes harmlessly in his hand, catching his sleeve on fire and stopping Kid Rock in his tracks momentarily. Trump tries to bat the flaming sleeve out with his other hand but the bag of cheeseburgers catches fire and soon he is ablaze, a suddenly-bright and glowing tribute to his entire political career. Seconds later, he is extinguished by a quick-thinking Kid Rock who douses him with the two PBRs he was double-fisting. But the damage is done. Trump, realizing those were the last cheeseburgers he would ever eat, raises a trembling, singed fist to the sky and says the first thing to come to mind: “Obama isn’t real!” Trump then falls to his knees, spent and hungry, as the officers flood the patio.
November 21, 2025 at 2:24 PM
hagen-patrick.bsky.social
Last minutes of the Trump administration: Donald Trump is sitting in an overpriced lawn chair on the Rose Garden Patio with a bag of McDonalds cheeseburgers in one hand and a Trump Pistol™ in the other. The pistol, adorned with Don Jr. on the barrel and Eric on the butt, reflects the dying sunlight in its cheap chrome plating. His lieutenants in jail, his legacy tied to a failed economy and pedophilia, and his favorite news channels abandoning him for legal security, Trump contemplates the dim future and puts another cheeseburger in his mouth. His latest Secretary of State, Kid Rock, walks onto the patio to gently encourage him to come inside before the DC police arrive. Trump chews thoughtlessly, brings the pistol up to point it at Kid Rock, and fires. The pistol—hastily assembled in a country he tariffed exorbitantly not long ago—explodes harmlessly in his hand, catching his sleeve on fire and stopping Kid Rock in his tracks momentarily. Trump tries to bat the flaming sleeve out with his other hand but the bag of cheeseburgers catches fire and soon he is ablaze, a suddenly-bright and glowing tribute to his entire political career. Seconds later, he is extinguished by a quick-thinking Kid Rock who douses him with the two PBRs he was double-fisting. But the damage is done. Trump, realizing those were the last cheeseburgers he would ever eat, raises a trembling, singed fist to the sky and says the first thing to come to mind: “Obama isn’t real!” Trump then falls to his knees, spent and hungry, as the officers flood the patio.
November 21, 2025 at 2:23 PM
hagen-patrick.bsky.social
Notice how he goes on about releasing it and then has his list of grievances but never mentions how it's for the good of justice or the survivors or the American people, just that he did it and got everyone to sign off on it because he said to do it. Distractions won't save Trump.
Trump "truth" screaming "I HAVE JUST SIGNED THE BILL TO RELEASE THE EPSTEIN FILES!" in addition to a fuck-ton of lies and bullshit. It's too long to give full alt text, sorry.
November 20, 2025 at 2:29 AM
hagen-patrick.bsky.social
October 29, 2025 at 2:17 PM
hagen-patrick.bsky.social
Just wanted to see what it might look like with a quick Photoshop filter.
October 21, 2025 at 6:16 PM
hagen-patrick.bsky.social
#Portland has entered the chat.
#NoKings
October 18, 2025 at 3:30 PM
hagen-patrick.bsky.social
#NoKings
Peachtree City
October 18, 2025 at 3:18 PM
hagen-patrick.bsky.social
Fake Nobel Piece of Shit Prize with Trump on face of medallion.
October 8, 2025 at 9:06 PM
hagen-patrick.bsky.social
Here's your Nobel Piece Prize, Trump.
Fake Nobel Piece of Shit Prize with Trump on face of medallion.
October 6, 2025 at 8:54 PM
hagen-patrick.bsky.social
From Judge Young's opinion, AAUP v. Rubio.
I further believe that the First Amendment grants an absolute right to believe in any governmental system, discuss all governmental affairs, and argue for desired changes in the existing order. This freedom is too dangerous for bad, tyrannical governments to permit. But those who wrote and adopted our First Amendment weighed those dangers against the dangers of censorship and deliberately chose the First Amendment’s unequivocal command that freedom of assembly, petition, speech and press shall not be abridged.”).
September 30, 2025 at 5:23 PM
hagen-patrick.bsky.social
Here's your prize, Trump.
Fake Nobel Piece of Shit Prize with Trump on face of medallion.
September 30, 2025 at 1:50 PM
hagen-patrick.bsky.social
Jeanine Pirro with an AI-generated glass of red wine in one hand.
August 20, 2025 at 1:15 PM
hagen-patrick.bsky.social
Image of Uncle Sam at a crossroads contemplating fascism, authoritarianism, and nazism with headline reading "America asks you don't join ice" and a URL for fuckice.net
August 12, 2025 at 6:30 PM
hagen-patrick.bsky.social
Image of Uncle Sam at a crossroads contemplating fascism, authoritarianism, and nazism with headline reading "America asks you don't join ice" and a URL for fuckice.net
August 12, 2025 at 6:29 PM
hagen-patrick.bsky.social
Image of Uncle Sam at a crossroads contemplating fascism, authoritarianism, and nazism with headline reading "America asks you don't join ice" and a URL for fuckice.net
August 12, 2025 at 6:27 PM
hagen-patrick.bsky.social
Image of Uncle Sam at a crossroads contemplating fascism, authoritarianism, and nazism with headline reading "America asks you don't join ice" and a URL for fuckice.net
August 12, 2025 at 6:26 PM
hagen-patrick.bsky.social
Image of Uncle Sam at a crossroads contemplating fascism, authoritarianism, and nazism with headline reading "America asks you don't join ice" and a URL for fuckice.net
August 12, 2025 at 6:26 PM
hagen-patrick.bsky.social
Image of Uncle Sam at a crossroads contemplating fascism, authoritarianism, and nazism with headline reading "America asks you don't join ice" and a URL for fuckice.net
August 12, 2025 at 6:25 PM
hagen-patrick.bsky.social
Left to Right: Drunky, Dummy, and Sleepy.
Press conference with Hegseth, Bondi, and Trump.
August 11, 2025 at 3:12 PM
hagen-patrick.bsky.social
One day soon…
The fall of the Burgermeister Meisterburger as shown by his portrait falling off the wall and then being dropped into the trash.
August 10, 2025 at 7:10 PM
hagen-patrick.bsky.social
Last minutes of the Trump administration: Donald Trump is sitting in an overpriced lawn chair on the Rose Garden Patio with a bag of McDonalds cheeseburgers in one hand and a Trump Pistol™ in the other. The pistol, adorned with Don Jr. on the barrel and Eric on the butt, reflects the dying sunlight in its cheap chrome plating. His lieutenants in jail, his legacy tied to a failed economy and pedophilia, and his favorite news channels abandoning him for legal security, Trump contemplates the dim future and puts another cheeseburger in his mouth. His latest Secretary of State, Kid Rock, walks onto the patio to gently encourage him to come inside before the DC police arrive. Trump chews thoughtlessly, brings the pistol up to point it at Kid Rock, and fires. The pistol—hastily assembled in a country he tariffed exorbitantly not long ago—explodes harmlessly in his hand, catching his sleeve on fire and stopping Kid Rock in his tracks momentarily. Trump tries to bat the flaming sleeve out with his other hand but the bag of cheeseburgers catches fire and soon he is ablaze, a suddenly-bright and glowing tribute to his entire political career. Seconds later, he is extinguished by a quick-thinking Kid Rock who douses him with the two PBRs he was double-fisting. But the damage is done. Trump, realizing those were the last cheeseburgers he would ever eat, raises a trembling, singed fist to the sky and says the first thing to come to mind: “Obama isn’t real!” Trump then falls to his knees, spent and hungry, as the officers flood the patio.
August 5, 2025 at 7:53 PM
hagen-patrick.bsky.social
Last minutes of the Trump administration: Donald Trump is sitting in an overpriced lawn chair on the Rose Garden Patio with a bag of McDonalds cheeseburgers in one hand and a Trump Pistol™ in the other. The pistol, adorned with Don Jr. on the barrel and Eric on the butt, reflects the dying sunlight in its cheap chrome plating. His lieutenants in jail, his legacy tied to a failed economy and pedophilia, and his favorite news channels abandoning him for legal security, Trump contemplates the dim future and puts another cheeseburger in his mouth. His latest Secretary of State, Kid Rock, walks onto the patio to gently encourage him to come inside before the DC police arrive. Trump chews thoughtlessly, brings the pistol up to point it at Kid Rock, and fires. The pistol—hastily assembled in a country he tariffed exorbitantly not long ago—explodes harmlessly in his hand, catching his sleeve on fire and stopping Kid Rock in his tracks momentarily. Trump tries to bat the flaming sleeve out with his other hand but the bag of cheeseburgers catches fire and soon he is ablaze, a suddenly-bright and glowing tribute to his entire political career. Seconds later, he is extinguished by a quick-thinking Kid Rock who douses him with the two PBRs he was double-fisting. But the damage is done. Trump, realizing those were the last cheeseburgers he would ever eat, raises a trembling, singed fist to the sky and says the first thing to come to mind: “Obama isn’t real!” Trump then falls to his knees, spent and hungry, as the officers flood the patio.
August 5, 2025 at 6:42 PM
hagen-patrick.bsky.social
Last minutes of the Trump administration: Donald Trump is sitting in an overpriced lawn chair on the Rose Garden Patio with a bag of McDonalds cheeseburgers in one hand and a Trump Pistol™ in the other. The pistol, adorned with Don Jr. on the barrel and Eric on the butt, reflects the dying sunlight in its cheap chrome plating. His lieutenants in jail, his legacy tied to a failed economy and pedophilia, and his favorite news channels abandoning him for legal security, Trump contemplates the dim future and puts another cheeseburger in his mouth. His latest Secretary of State, Kid Rock, walks onto the patio to gently encourage him to come inside before the DC police arrive. Trump chews thoughtlessly, brings the pistol up to point it at Kid Rock, and fires. The pistol—hastily assembled in a country he tariffed exorbitantly not long ago—explodes harmlessly in his hand, catching his sleeve on fire and stopping Kid Rock in his tracks momentarily. Trump tries to bat the flaming sleeve out with his other hand but the bag of cheeseburgers catches fire and soon he is ablaze, a suddenly-bright and glowing tribute to his entire political career. Seconds later, he is extinguished by a quick-thinking Kid Rock who douses him with the two PBRs he was double-fisting. But the damage is done. Trump, realizing those were the last cheeseburgers he would ever eat, raises a trembling, singed fist to the sky and says the first thing to come to mind: “Obama isn’t real!” Trump then falls to his knees, spent and hungry, as the officers flood the patio.
August 5, 2025 at 6:37 PM
hagen-patrick.bsky.social
Sign reading: I'm going to start a religion Where we practice Love Kindness Charity Good acts Respect And it's going to go global And a lot of people will be on board And I'll call it Christianity. And the Supreme Court will have to respect
July 3, 2025 at 5:16 PM
hagen-patrick.bsky.social
Always watching.
A young black cat keeping her eyes on you.
June 30, 2025 at 5:57 PM