Andy Martin
@grassapewrites.bsky.social
Archaeologist, musician, writer, outside dude. Cat dad. Needed a place to plug my creative wares that hasn’t decided to embrace bigotry for profit.
Drummer/singer of https://clamfight.bandcamp.com
Drummer/singer of https://clamfight.bandcamp.com
Pinned
Andy Martin
@grassapewrites.bsky.social
· Jan 11
Unsure as to how much I’ll use this but it’s only fitting that my first post is Baby Frances the Racing Snail.
Peak Virginia is a pickup truck covered in gun decals, with a single Minion decal for good measure, being flummoxed by a traffic circle.
I love that the 2A motherfuckers who dream about an another Civil War will get annihilated the first time the 3rd Fem Boy Battalion leads them into a roundabout.
I love that the 2A motherfuckers who dream about an another Civil War will get annihilated the first time the 3rd Fem Boy Battalion leads them into a roundabout.
December 11, 2025 at 11:48 AM
Peak Virginia is a pickup truck covered in gun decals, with a single Minion decal for good measure, being flummoxed by a traffic circle.
I love that the 2A motherfuckers who dream about an another Civil War will get annihilated the first time the 3rd Fem Boy Battalion leads them into a roundabout.
I love that the 2A motherfuckers who dream about an another Civil War will get annihilated the first time the 3rd Fem Boy Battalion leads them into a roundabout.
Catfood has names like, “flaked salmon entrees for demure princesses” and dog food has names like “WILD MEAT CHUNKS FOR WOLVES THAT STAND FOR THE FLAG AND KNEEL FOR THE CROSS.”
November 30, 2025 at 6:59 PM
Catfood has names like, “flaked salmon entrees for demure princesses” and dog food has names like “WILD MEAT CHUNKS FOR WOLVES THAT STAND FOR THE FLAG AND KNEEL FOR THE CROSS.”
Reposted by Andy Martin
Finally getting some theological clarity on the ethics of reclining in one’s plane seat
November 29, 2025 at 12:13 PM
Finally getting some theological clarity on the ethics of reclining in one’s plane seat
Passed a coyote in an empty field today. The coyote was the size of a small deer but even before I knew what it was, I knew it wasn’t a deer. When deer move they’re on the lookout for…whereas a coyote or any predator really, is looking for.
It’s a minor distinction but it means everything.
It’s a minor distinction but it means everything.
November 26, 2025 at 10:55 PM
Passed a coyote in an empty field today. The coyote was the size of a small deer but even before I knew what it was, I knew it wasn’t a deer. When deer move they’re on the lookout for…whereas a coyote or any predator really, is looking for.
It’s a minor distinction but it means everything.
It’s a minor distinction but it means everything.
When the Leftist firebrands at my incredibly middle of the political road home town Newspaper are saying the Democrats fucked up, you really know they fucked up.
OPINION: "Many are rightly mad at the eight Democrats who broke ranks and gave in. Capitulating to Trump will only further embolden his authoritarian ways." — The Inquirer Editorial Board
Democrats caved on shutdown as Trump’s indifference to Americans suffering proved stronger | Editorial
The shutdown underscored clear policy differences between the two political parties: Trump and the Republicans do not care about everyday Americans.
www.inquirer.com
November 11, 2025 at 2:21 PM
When the Leftist firebrands at my incredibly middle of the political road home town Newspaper are saying the Democrats fucked up, you really know they fucked up.
Look, I just turned 46 but still do a lot of stupid shit so I don’t really feeeel 46, but I just told my wife, “this is a great time of year for grapefruit, they just don’t miss” which means I am in fact, 46 as fuck.
November 6, 2025 at 1:41 AM
Look, I just turned 46 but still do a lot of stupid shit so I don’t really feeeel 46, but I just told my wife, “this is a great time of year for grapefruit, they just don’t miss” which means I am in fact, 46 as fuck.
Reposted by Andy Martin
“Installing a marble shitter, boy I dunno if he’s about to respect term limits!” - every failed democracy of the past century
October 31, 2025 at 8:37 PM
“Installing a marble shitter, boy I dunno if he’s about to respect term limits!” - every failed democracy of the past century
Reposted by Andy Martin
Charging headlong into the new era in which we see every congressional candidate fully nude during the primaries
October 22, 2025 at 5:11 PM
Charging headlong into the new era in which we see every congressional candidate fully nude during the primaries
One surprising way that black metal and NPR country are the same is that I Google the fuck out of any new artists I find to make sure they’re not Nazis.
October 22, 2025 at 2:27 PM
One surprising way that black metal and NPR country are the same is that I Google the fuck out of any new artists I find to make sure they’re not Nazis.
Saw this beast coming at me at the same I got a “who’s raincoat is this?” text from a coworker.
In Virginia.
‘Twas my raincoat.
In Virginia.
‘Twas my raincoat.
October 21, 2025 at 12:34 PM
Saw this beast coming at me at the same I got a “who’s raincoat is this?” text from a coworker.
In Virginia.
‘Twas my raincoat.
In Virginia.
‘Twas my raincoat.
This rules so God damn hard.
I didn’t realize this technology existed already but I can smell the double-dip state and county pensions from this video.
MAGA man eats pavement after shouting slurs at No Kings protesters
October 19, 2025 at 6:54 PM
This rules so God damn hard.
Caught up with some non-American rock and roll pals tonight and let me just tell you, ain’t no fucking cop or American soldier as brave as any non-American metal band touring the US right now.
August 31, 2025 at 5:19 AM
Caught up with some non-American rock and roll pals tonight and let me just tell you, ain’t no fucking cop or American soldier as brave as any non-American metal band touring the US right now.
I’m not supremely optimistic that we have elections in 2026, or that they’ll matter if we do, but outside of Trump’s hand picked people the Republicans seem pretty bad at fascism and like they may not stick with it.
Doomers: The 2026 election doesn't matter, Republicans are just going to rig the whole thing anyway
Various red state republican incumbents: I'm just going to quit now because if I run in 2026 I'm going to get absolutely killed
Various red state republican incumbents: I'm just going to quit now because if I run in 2026 I'm going to get absolutely killed
REPUBLICAN US SENATOR ERNST WON'T SEEK REELECTION IN 2026 - REPORTS
August 29, 2025 at 9:30 PM
I’m not supremely optimistic that we have elections in 2026, or that they’ll matter if we do, but outside of Trump’s hand picked people the Republicans seem pretty bad at fascism and like they may not stick with it.
AI this, AI that, I ain't impressed with nothing until I can text my cat.
August 23, 2025 at 12:31 AM
AI this, AI that, I ain't impressed with nothing until I can text my cat.
The White House is mobilizing red state military forces to occupy a Democratic stronghold and let me tell you: No one has ever pretended something isn't happening harder than Democratic leaders are pretending this isn't happening right now.
WASHINGTON (AP) — South Carolina, Ohio also sending National Guard troops to DC in further escalation of federal intervention in Dem city.
August 17, 2025 at 3:03 AM
If American history has taught me anything, it’s that we are ten years out from Hollywood making movies about how the Fed Pigs hassling homeless people in DC are secretly sad and conflicted about it.
Fuck that, don’t ever let them white wash this shit.
Fuck that, don’t ever let them white wash this shit.
August 15, 2025 at 10:55 PM
If American history has taught me anything, it’s that we are ten years out from Hollywood making movies about how the Fed Pigs hassling homeless people in DC are secretly sad and conflicted about it.
Fuck that, don’t ever let them white wash this shit.
Fuck that, don’t ever let them white wash this shit.
Fuck RFK.
RFK Jr. backs down all the time when he gets push back, so if anyone wants to call, here's the HHS number 1-877-696-6775.
I'd also call your senators/reps as well.
I'd also call your senators/reps as well.
WASHINGTON (AP) — Health Secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr. announces he will cancel $500 million in vaccine development projects.
August 6, 2025 at 12:35 AM
Fuck RFK.
I am the binturong, the work truck is my enclosure, and the 5 hour energy drink I cannot find is my enrichment item.
August 4, 2025 at 3:35 PM
I am the binturong, the work truck is my enclosure, and the 5 hour energy drink I cannot find is my enrichment item.
The morning of CSA pickup day totally fucking rocks because I feel compelled to stand in the kitchen like a black bear and eat every God damn blue berry in the house because today there will be…new berries.
July 31, 2025 at 11:19 AM
The morning of CSA pickup day totally fucking rocks because I feel compelled to stand in the kitchen like a black bear and eat every God damn blue berry in the house because today there will be…new berries.
Trump polling at 97% among people whose top concerns are “water not coming out of the tap as hard” and “toilet can’t handle the results of my all-burgers diet on the first flush”
July 29, 2025 at 11:18 PM
Anytime Megadaeath is playing in the pet store I assume the guy that sells the snakes is djing.
July 23, 2025 at 6:33 PM
Anytime Megadaeath is playing in the pet store I assume the guy that sells the snakes is djing.
“Step Brothers” is a masterpiece and this article provides the theoretical framework to prove it.
“Many comedies are funny because they’re goofy, but STEP BROTHERS is funny because of the liminality of the world in which it takes place, hovering between live-action cartoon & kitchen-sink reality so precariously that it almost seems to violate the laws of comedy physics.”
Notes Towards a Theory of the Uncanniness of Adam McKay's STEP BROTHERS
'Step Brothers' takes place in a reality that’s neither here nor there, one that slips through your grasp every time you think you’ve gotten your hands around it.
www.brightwalldarkroom.com
July 22, 2025 at 11:06 AM
“Step Brothers” is a masterpiece and this article provides the theoretical framework to prove it.