G.M. Nair - Author Ordinaire
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gmnair.bsky.social
G.M. Nair - Author Ordinaire
@gmnair.bsky.social
2.3K followers 1K following 3.5K posts
Rocket Scientist, Jokey Boi, Author of DUCKETT & DYER: DICKS FOR HIRE, Worst #SPSFC 1 Finalist

Opinions are like assholes

https://linktr.ee/gmnair
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gmnair.bsky.social
DUCKETT & DYER: DICKS FOR HIRE - They aren't detectives, but they have to become detectives to figure out who's telling people they're detectives. But, if they don't play the part, the entire concept of existence might just cease to exist.

books2read.com/u/bOe0DE
the cover for DUCKETT & DYER: DICKS FOR HIRE. A blue and white comic-booky collage of two bumbling detectives, a cow-man with eyeballs for fingertips, a giant rabbit and a grappling hook - Art by Tareque Powaday
November 12, 2025 at 4:11 PM
gmnair.bsky.social
Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. in the Zohran campaign font
November 9, 2025 at 1:35 AM
gmnair.bsky.social
I think it's pretty obvious who wrote it
Rich Uncle Pennybags
November 8, 2025 at 9:16 PM
gmnair.bsky.social
I tried using AI for one of my covers and the results were terrible.
The cover of DUCKETT & DYER: DICKS FOR HIRE using the poster for Stephen Spielberg's movie "A.I." to fill in all the relevant parts. It's a good joke.
November 7, 2025 at 9:23 PM
gmnair.bsky.social
But wait, there's more! THE MYSTERY OF THE MURDERED GUY is the third in the series with a slate of short stories which feature a daring jewel heist, a medically-licensed vampire, a genderfluid reverse werewolf, and robots, maybe?

books2read.com/u/mqB2LO
An arrow-heavy promotion graphic for THE MYSTERY OF THE MURDERED GUY featuring: -Detectives Who Aren't Detectives -High stakes action -Low Stakes Jokes -Genderfluid Reverse Werewolf -What even is this book?
November 7, 2025 at 2:05 PM
gmnair.bsky.social
If that catches your fancy, don't sleep on the sequel: THE ONE-HUNDRED PERCENT SOLUTION and THE MYSTERY OF THE MURDERED GUY, which features a giant eldritch kaiju, a creepy cult, a man who wears an octopus like a hat, and the Nintendo Virtual Boy.

books2read.com/u/3RYMMG
An arrow-heavy promotion graphic for THE ONE HUNDRED PERCENT SOLUTION -Detectives Who Aren't Detectives -Assassins and cults! -The Illuminati (but not the ones you're thinking of!) -Nintendo Virtual Boy (tm) -Octopus Hats?
November 7, 2025 at 2:05 PM
gmnair.bsky.social
Here's some unsolicited book promo for DUCKETT & DYER: DICKS FOR HIRE - my #scifi #mystery #comedy novel about two friends who aren't detectives, but become detectives to figure out who's telling people they're detectives.

Available wherever terrible books are sold!

books2read.com/u/bOe0DE
An arrow-heavy promotion graphic for DUCKETT & DYER: DICKS FOR HIRE featuring: -Detectives Who Aren't Detectives -At least one funny joke -The Multiverse(tm) -Hamburgers that eat people -and more weird, inexplicable shit
November 7, 2025 at 2:05 PM
gmnair.bsky.social
Also, now that I've built it up enough, this will be extra funny.

7/7
BACK TO THE TOILET, in Back to the Future Font, but it looks a little janky. Definitely not made by AI.
October 20, 2025 at 2:53 PM
gmnair.bsky.social
DUCKETT & DYER: DICKS FOR HIRE has hit 300 Reviews on Amazon!

Are they good reviews?

...DUCKETT & DYER: DICKS FOR HIRE has hit 300 Reviews on Amazon!
A screenshot of Duckett & Dyer's Amazon page showing 300 reviews.
August 22, 2025 at 3:30 PM
gmnair.bsky.social
That being said, it does read like I've invaded his office to kill him, so maybe it's ok?
the back cover of Duckett & Dyer Dicks for Hire with several fake blurbs: See What "People" Are "Saying": "Who are you? How did you get into my office?" - Neil Gaiman, if asked about this book, probably "I can't stop laughing!" - Victim of Papuan Laughing Sickness (Deceased) "Duckett & Dyer has a tremendous energy to it. When released, it will warm your body and perhaps even your soul." - International Journal of Burning Things In A Fireplace "A long written or printed literary composition." - Webster's Dictionary Definition of 'book' "Duckett & Dyer is the funniest thing I've ever read." - A woman who has never read anything before
August 5, 2025 at 2:00 PM
gmnair.bsky.social
DUCKETT & DYER: DICKS FOR HIRE - They aren't detectives, but they have to become detectives in order to figure out who's telling people they're detectives. And if they don't play the part, the concept of existence might just cease to exist.

books2read.com/u/bOe0DE
An arrow-heavy promotion graphic for DUCKETT & DYER: DICKS FOR HIRE featuring: -Detectives Who Aren't Detectives -At least one funny joke -The Multiverse(tm) -Hamburgers that eat people -and more weird, inexplicable shit
August 1, 2025 at 3:06 PM
gmnair.bsky.social
July 29, 2025 at 5:41 PM
gmnair.bsky.social
Here's a quick thread on where to find my DUCKETT & DYER: DICKS FOR HIRE ebooks, since that's not at all straightforward anymore! (1/5)

#indieauthors #booksky
An arrow-heavy promotion graphic for DUCKETT & DYER: DICKS FOR HIRE featuring: -Detectives Who Aren't Detectives -At least one funny joke -The Multiverse(tm) -Hamburgers that eat people -and more weird, inexplicable shit An arrow-heavy promotion graphic for THE ONE HUNDRED PERCENT SOLUTION -Detectives Who Aren't Detectives -Assassins and cults! -The Illuminati (but not the ones you're thinking of!) -Nintendo Virtual Boy (tm) -Octopus Hats? An arrow-heavy promotion graphic for THE MYSTERY OF THE MURDERED GUY featuring: -Detectives Who Aren't Detectives -High stakes action -Low Stakes Jokes -Genderfluid Reverse Werewolf -What even is this book?
July 28, 2025 at 1:19 PM
gmnair.bsky.social
you could do worse than my book, DUCKETT & DYER: DICKS FOR HIRE, but you could also do a lot better.

They aren't detectives, but have to become detectives to figure out who's telling people they're detectives. If they don't, the concept of existence might just cease to exist.

nairforceone.itch.io
An arrow filled promo for DUCKETT & DYER: DICKS FOR HIRE Featuring such gems as: Detectives that aren't detectives Hamburgers that eat people Interdimensional threesome And at least one funny joke
July 12, 2025 at 11:56 AM
gmnair.bsky.social
Hell, this Anti-Prime Day isn't limited to my books! If you want to subscribe to my serialized Patreon story BIRDS OF A FEATHER FLOCK FOREVER, you'll get 50% off your 1st month!

If you go for the free tier (recommended), you'll even get 50% off that! What a steal!

www.patreon.com/c/user?u=582...
Birds of a Feather Flock Forever - a Patreon Exclusive Thing by G.M. Nair A man and a woman sit on the roof of a VW lovebus as a dragon flies by, all of them silhouetted by a giant yellow 80s vaporwave moon. Birds of a Feather Flock Forever - a Patreon Exclusive Thing by G.M. Nair A man and a woman sit on the roof of a VW lovebus as a dragon flies by, all of them silhouetted by a giant yellow 80s vaporwave moon.
July 9, 2025 at 1:36 PM
gmnair.bsky.social
Happy #PrimeDay! Today's a great day to get a deep discount on my DUCKETT & DYER: DICKS FOR HIRE books via MY OWN WEBSITE and NOT through Amazon. Click through www.ds-df.com to my store and nab all my books at a 50% discount!
An arrow-heavy promotion graphic for DUCKETT & DYER: DICKS FOR HIRE featuring: -Detectives Who Aren't Detectives -At least one funny joke -The Multiverse(tm) -Hamburgers that eat people -and more weird, inexplicable shit An arrow-heavy promotion graphic for THE ONE HUNDRED PERCENT SOLUTION -Detectives Who Aren't Detectives -Assassins and cults! -The Illuminati (but not the ones you're thinking of!) -Nintendo Virtual Boy (tm) -Octopus Hats? An arrow-heavy promotion graphic for THE MYSTERY OF THE MURDERED GUY featuring: -Detectives Who Aren't Detectives -High stakes action -Low Stakes Jokes -Genderfluid Reverse Werewolf -What even is this book?
July 9, 2025 at 1:25 PM
gmnair.bsky.social
Hork Pajorb. Space Lawyer.
A black and white 4 panel comic: PANEL 1 - A sci-fi cityscape. Text boxes read - "Centraluna. The seat of Galactic Power." PANEL 2 - Text box reads - "...and home to a very flawed legal system." A large stone building with statues guarding the entrance. CENTRALUNA HIGH COURT is carved across the top. PANEL 3 - Text box reads - "Not a friendly place for a conman like myself." A tentacled, 3-eyed alien judge sits behind their bench asking "Does the defense have any rebuttal to the prosecutor's statement?" PANEL 4 - A gray alien in a suit answers "Yes, we do, your honor." Text boxes read - "Yeah. That's me. I bet you're wondering how I got here." Title Card: HORK PAJORB. SPACE LAWYER. A black and white 4 panel comic: PANEL 1 - A ringed planet hangs in space, with a spaceship arcing toward it. Text boxes read - "Gongorn Prime. The Prison Planet." PANEL 2 - The outer wall of a prison. The sign across it says "Gongorn Holding. Est. 2245 P.D. 'Just like grandma used to extrajudicially detain.' Text boxes read - "It holds those deemed a threat to order. Rebels. Thieves." PANEL 3 - Text box reads "Conmen." A gray alien is held in a cell with laser bars and monitored by an armed guard. PANEL 4 - The gray alien in prison jumpsuit. Text boxes read "Yeah. That's me. I bet you're wondering how I got-" which is then interrupted by the guard off panel. "HEY. Shut the hell up in there!" The implication being that the alien has been self narrating aloud this whole time. Very funny. Roll on snare drum. Everyone claps.
June 29, 2025 at 12:35 AM
gmnair.bsky.social
is this really the world you want your children to live in, and your children’s children,
A news chyron about Zohran Mamdani's Socialist Promises: Those guitars that are, like, double guitars
June 28, 2025 at 12:15 AM
gmnair.bsky.social
Today is your last chance to get a bundle of 4 amazing indie sci-fi comedy books on itch! We might not meet our goal of $999,999.99, but we could be closer than ever before!

itch.io/b/3033/space-jokes-coast-to-coast

#booksky #writesky
They're not Adams. They're not Pratchett. They're worse. Much worse. Much, much worse. (The "much worse" schtick continues in the background of the image) Space Jokes: Coast to Coast A snarky scifi bundle on itch.io Red Darkling, L.A. Guettler The Audacity, Carmen Loup Percival Gynt and the Inevitability of Fire, Drew Melbourne Duckett & Dyer: Dicks for Hire, G.M. Nair Four authors One price At least 2.56 laffs
June 25, 2025 at 1:00 PM
gmnair.bsky.social
It's my birthday*, and if you wanna get me a gift, get yourself one instead! Me and 3 other authors of funny, snarky sci-fi put together this Itch bundle that gives you 4 books at a great price. You'd be stupid NOT to buy it.

itch.io/b/3033/space-jokes-coast-to-coast

#booksky #writesky
They're not Adams. They're not Pratchett. They're worse. Much worse. Much, much worse. (The "much worse" schtick continues in the background of the image) Space Jokes: Coast to Coast A snarky scifi bundle on itch.io Red Darkling, L.A. Guettler The Audacity, Carmen Loup Percival Gynt and the Inevitability of Fire, Drew Melbourne Duckett & Dyer: Dicks for Hire, G.M. Nair Four authors One price At least 2.56 laffs
June 18, 2025 at 12:53 PM
gmnair.bsky.social
Chapter 5 of my serialized Patreon urban fantasy BIRDS OF A FEATHER FLOCK FOREVER is now out for all members!

Join now! It's free and the main character almost kills a dog!

What? ...I SAID 'almost'!

www.patreon.com/c/user?u=582...
Birds of a Feather Flock Forever - a Patreon Exclusive Thing by G.M. Nair A man and a woman sit on the roof of a VW lovebus as a dragon flies by, all of them silhouetted by a giant yellow 80s vaporwave moon.
May 29, 2025 at 1:23 PM
gmnair.bsky.social
In conjunction with the snarky sci-fi bundle, I'm also putting all the hard and softcover copies of DUCKETT & DYER's two sequels at 50% off on my webstore! Not to mention the handsome Duckett & Dyer t-shirt!

You'd be stupid NOT to buy them (while supplies last)!

dsdf-books.square.site
An arrow-heavy promotion graphic for THE ONE HUNDRED PERCENT SOLUTION -Detectives Who Aren't Detectives -Assassins and cults! -The Illuminati (but not the ones you're thinking of!) -Nintendo Virtual Boy (tm) -Octopus Hats? An arrow-heavy promotion graphic for THE MYSTERY OF THE MURDERED GUY featuring: -Detectives Who Aren't Detectives -High stakes action -Low Stakes Jokes -Genderfluid Reverse Werewolf -What even is this book? The Duckett & Dyer: Dicks For Hire t-shirt - featuring the last names of several famous detectives and two infamous ones.
May 25, 2025 at 3:31 PM
gmnair.bsky.social
The C&H strip that was the second most influential, obviously, was this one:
TYRANNOSAURS IN F-14s!!
May 19, 2025 at 4:11 PM
gmnair.bsky.social
That being said, I think the C&H strip that most influenced me as a kid (and now, honestly) is this one:
A Calvin & Hobbes strip. Calvin picks up a ringing phone and asks to order a large anchovy pizza. The person on the other end is rightly confused and Calvin states he must have dialed the wrong number. Calvin walks away proudly stating he "tries to make everyone's day a little more surreal."
May 19, 2025 at 4:08 PM
gmnair.bsky.social
My DUCKETT & DYER: DICKS FOR HIRE books aren't generated from artificial intelligence.

Hell, they aren't even generated from regular intelligence!

nairforceone.itch.io
An arrow-heavy promotion graphic for DUCKETT & DYER: DICKS FOR HIRE featuring: -Detectives Who Aren't Detectives -At least one funny joke -The Multiverse(tm) -Hamburgers that eat people -and more weird, inexplicable shit
May 16, 2025 at 12:18 PM