Fart To Table
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farttotable.bsky.social
Fart To Table
@farttotable.bsky.social
400 followers 440 following 750 posts
Destroying my mental health one doom scroll at a time!
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farttotable.bsky.social
I would if I could find her
The edge of a bed and clearly no kitty tail coming out from under the bed. If anyone has seen my cat please let me know.
November 5, 2025 at 3:47 AM
farttotable.bsky.social
In case you don't accept beans I have posted a picture of Marcy, owner and provider of said beans.
A very stunned (and stunning) looking gray cat sitting on top of a black blanket. She is holding up her paw, displaying her toe beans front and center. Her ears are also very silly. A close up of a gray cat's paw displaying all of the magnificent toe beans.
November 5, 2025 at 2:24 AM
farttotable.bsky.social
I had such a great time last time watching Clue with a bunch of other diehard Clue fans. Lesley Ann Warren is a delight and still looks phenomenal. There were so many people dressed up and I was wildly jealous
A projection of Clue: The Movie 40th Anniversary Screening Hosted by the original Miss Scarlet Lesley Ann Warren Not pictured: the amazing costumes in the room
November 1, 2025 at 3:21 PM
farttotable.bsky.social
When you're on watch duty, but brought too much cozy to the stakeout
A gray tortie resting sleepily on a gray comforter. She is diligently watching me (out of frame), but is so comfy on my husband's leg that she can't stay awake. She loves to keep an eye on hooligans, and I clearly am one. There is a mess in the background but that can be ignored.
October 26, 2025 at 7:05 PM
farttotable.bsky.social
Things are awful and scary, but sometimes things can be good, like my cat falling asleep on me, mid-stretchy
A beautiful gray cat who was previously asleep in a circle, but has stretched out her feet to become long. Her tail is draped over the feet for added comfort and class. She is also softest girl in the world.
July 20, 2025 at 3:57 PM
farttotable.bsky.social
I love @dropout.tv for making great strides towards measuring friendship
A text exchange between me and my best friend. Friend: you could tell my breast milk from taste right? Me: it would have hints of aperitif (this message has been hearted)
July 15, 2025 at 3:55 PM
farttotable.bsky.social
Applying for jobs in this market
A sign saying "we are empty (empty is underlined) but also...for SALE!!" The sign is on top of a Pokémon card wrapper and under a Lapras
June 22, 2025 at 4:47 PM
farttotable.bsky.social
My goodness, we have cat twins! My girl is more of a figurehead than a leader, but she has a lot of opinions on naps
A gray cat cuddling with a leg that is under a maroon blanket. The cat's back legs are stretched outwards to make sure she is taking up as much space as possible. The human on the couch is happy to give up the space to the cat even though she doesn't have a choice in the matter.
April 9, 2025 at 4:48 AM
farttotable.bsky.social
Marcy would never go on a plane because we can't afford first class and because we would not survive putting her in her carrier
A beautiful and glamorous gray cat looking at the camera with a mixture of contempt and comfort. She is lying down on top of me, who is under a maroon blanket. She is also on top of my bladder, which is full and of no concern to the glamorous cat.
April 2, 2025 at 3:54 PM
farttotable.bsky.social
My favorite sign from #standupforscience today in Boston
A cardboard sign that reads: didn't know the leeches were returning to medicine. "Leeches" has an image of blood dripping from the words. There is also a picture of a leech with donald trump's hair.
March 7, 2025 at 7:41 PM
farttotable.bsky.social
Welp, it's that time I guess.
A screenshot from tiktok stating the following: Sorry, TikTok isn't available right now A law banning TikTok has been enacted in the U.S. Unfortunately, that means you can't use TikTok for now. We are fortunate that president trump has indicated that he will work with us on a solution to reinstate TikTok once he takes office. Please stay tuned!
January 19, 2025 at 3:44 AM
farttotable.bsky.social
It's come to my attention that a bunch of people have just arrived here. Therefore, there are a bunch of people who may not have seen my cat. Please have a silly and glamor
A gray cat laying down on a red blanket with bunny feet, belly showing. She's looking up like she has just been caught trying to steal the one true ring. There is a tiny teef. A gray cat looking at me with utter disdain because I am working instead of petting her. She has no idea about bills. She has natural eye liner and is more beautiful than anything in the world. She is also so soft.
October 18, 2024 at 12:53 PM
farttotable.bsky.social
Now, why did I assume there was a 50 page indictment about sandwiches and deli meats?
Cropped screenshot from an article about Eric Adams saying "corruptions entirely unrelated to today's indictment. Today's indictment is most about how much Eric Adams allegedly loves Turkey.
September 26, 2024 at 5:45 PM
farttotable.bsky.social
Boston tour busses touring our most important and historical sites
A limo service bus with the doors open outside of a dunkin donuts. About 8 people went on the bus with dunkin so it wasn't like the driver made a quick stop. I'm assuming they made a stop at dunkin because it's a limo service and therefore it's fancy.
September 6, 2024 at 12:14 PM
farttotable.bsky.social
My friend's puggle looks at lobster rolls the same way I do
A very old puggle literally drooling over a lobster roll. He will routinely find people barbecuing and sit there barking
August 22, 2024 at 12:35 AM
farttotable.bsky.social
Before and after my husband dared to move his arm
A gray kitty snuggling so hard in the arms of someone who will soon betray him The same gray kitty looking very annoyed and betrayed since the arm moved slightly
August 19, 2024 at 11:36 PM
farttotable.bsky.social
This is honestly probably the least weird day for JD Vance's publicist
AP Fact Check No, JD Vance did not have sex with a couch Pictured: a man named JD Vance who, if he hasn't fucked a couch is probably going to try it
July 25, 2024 at 2:32 AM
farttotable.bsky.social
It is Marcy's birthday, and all she wants is to talk to you about B2B sales
A gray kitty who is 11 today. She is looking right at the camera the way a professional would. She is sitting on a couch next to a pillow the same color as her. The pillow lacks the silliness of Marcy's belly.
May 27, 2024 at 12:48 AM
farttotable.bsky.social
Will you accept kitten strength? She has a fuzzy belly.
A gray calico on her back, with bunny feets. She is on a white comforter and is eagerly awaiting pets. This is a trap. She had just woken my husband up for pets, and he thought it was me.
April 19, 2024 at 2:44 PM
farttotable.bsky.social
Unfortunately, I can't contribute to this cat bait, but I can show you a picture of my blinds.
Just an ordinary picture of window blinds. There definitely isn't a gray cat peering through them next to a red tote bag she always keeps with her when she's spying on the neighbors.
April 17, 2024 at 7:31 PM
farttotable.bsky.social
Marcy is also a belly temptress. Touch the belly at your own peril.
A gray kitty on her back, fully displaying her belly. All her feets are spread out in a silly and lewd way. She looks like she wants her belly pet, but it's a trap.
March 17, 2024 at 6:23 PM
farttotable.bsky.social
Do you ever feel like you're being watched?
It's difficult to see, but there is a very sneaky gray kitty peering around the couch. This kitty is a ferocious hunter (not really), and very soft (very much so). I am in danger (not at all unless you count cuddles).
February 13, 2024 at 3:28 PM
farttotable.bsky.social
Now that Bluesky is open, I feel the need to reiterate our only rule, which is to praise my cat creatively and constantly
A beautiful gray kitty finding her light like the model she is. She's on a maroon blanket watching my husband play Palworld. She is soft and good.
February 6, 2024 at 4:36 PM
farttotable.bsky.social
I was so close to not seeing that picture, and then I had to keep scrolling. Here's a kitty with a smooshed face. She is very clean
A close-up picture of a very cozy gray kitty. Half of her face is shumshed against my leg. The other half is full covergirl glamor. (Not pictured: soft)
February 4, 2024 at 5:16 AM
farttotable.bsky.social
I said boob and the kitten is aghast
A gray kitty with her paw to her face looking shocked and appalled.
January 9, 2024 at 12:30 AM