Jesse
@epitomized.bsky.social
my life sounds more glamorous in print 💅🏳️🌈
I am a minimalist. I lived on my sailboat for a half decade. I’ve lived in a van. I love minimalism. I’d also take this home in a heartbeat.
November 23, 2025 at 4:12 PM
I am a minimalist. I lived on my sailboat for a half decade. I’ve lived in a van. I love minimalism. I’d also take this home in a heartbeat.
Republican campaign consultants planned to make Mamdani the evil enemy for the midterms. Now that have to explain Trump fawning all over him in the Oval.
November 22, 2025 at 12:15 AM
Republican campaign consultants planned to make Mamdani the evil enemy for the midterms. Now that have to explain Trump fawning all over him in the Oval.
The FB algorithm thinks I’m wealthy. You should see some of the ads I get. As if I am going to charter a jet from an ad. Or buy a $4K gallon of paint. Or a $30K gently used Birkin. The ads are wild. Meanwhile, I am a minimalist who loves a $3.85 plain Hanes tee. Wearing one now.
November 21, 2025 at 7:10 AM
The FB algorithm thinks I’m wealthy. You should see some of the ads I get. As if I am going to charter a jet from an ad. Or buy a $4K gallon of paint. Or a $30K gently used Birkin. The ads are wild. Meanwhile, I am a minimalist who loves a $3.85 plain Hanes tee. Wearing one now.
Chill, Temu. In addition to the ghost gun and tactical helmet they also offered me
Something they call a ‘predator drone.’
Something they call a ‘predator drone.’
November 21, 2025 at 4:34 AM
Chill, Temu. In addition to the ghost gun and tactical helmet they also offered me
Something they call a ‘predator drone.’
Something they call a ‘predator drone.’
I miss the five years of Key West sunsets on my boat.
October 17, 2025 at 9:38 PM
I miss the five years of Key West sunsets on my boat.
Trump hates Chicago because that is where Obama built his profile and Trump will never get over Obama humiliating him at the White House Correspondents Dinner … which resulted in birtherism and then President Trump.
October 13, 2025 at 7:39 PM
Trump hates Chicago because that is where Obama built his profile and Trump will never get over Obama humiliating him at the White House Correspondents Dinner … which resulted in birtherism and then President Trump.
Lots of people seem interested in revisiting this classic too.
October 13, 2025 at 2:48 AM
Lots of people seem interested in revisiting this classic too.
What do they get in return?
September 25, 2025 at 10:57 PM
What do they get in return?
They’ve recently become besties.
September 22, 2025 at 4:32 PM
They’ve recently become besties.
They may be related.
September 22, 2025 at 4:30 PM
They may be related.
Just like we said, declaring martial law has always been the end goal.
September 15, 2025 at 1:42 PM
Just like we said, declaring martial law has always been the end goal.
I’m in the hospital. My nurse loves me. I asked for a sandwich and a small Sprite and Coke. 🤣🥰
September 12, 2025 at 12:15 AM
I’m in the hospital. My nurse loves me. I asked for a sandwich and a small Sprite and Coke. 🤣🥰
I am gay but would answer like the straight man. I always say that I hope I’m never a crime witness because I will have absolutely nothing to contribute as to how they appeared. 🤣
August 20, 2025 at 5:21 PM
I am gay but would answer like the straight man. I always say that I hope I’m never a crime witness because I will have absolutely nothing to contribute as to how they appeared. 🤣
He always has that jet prominently displayed. It’s presently on the coffee table of the now hideous Oval. Qatar noticed too and bribed him with what he wants more than anything.
August 19, 2025 at 6:12 PM
He always has that jet prominently displayed. It’s presently on the coffee table of the now hideous Oval. Qatar noticed too and bribed him with what he wants more than anything.
The thing about doing dog rescue and transport is that the sanctuary dogs (aka personal dogs) instantly become friends with other dogs.
August 8, 2025 at 2:28 PM
The thing about doing dog rescue and transport is that the sanctuary dogs (aka personal dogs) instantly become friends with other dogs.
Freya and Oakley are BFFs. #rescuedog #dogrescue
August 7, 2025 at 11:37 PM
Freya and Oakley are BFFs. #rescuedog #dogrescue
Blaze always looks so goofy when he falls asleep in the passenger seat.
July 29, 2025 at 7:06 PM
Blaze always looks so goofy when he falls asleep in the passenger seat.