Elliott Downing
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elliottdowning.bsky.social
Elliott Downing
@elliottdowning.bsky.social
Author of books seldom read, screenplays never filmed, software rarely used, and bleets like sweet, sweet honey.

If you were following @elliott_downing over on TwitterX, you've found me (or failed to avoid me, as the case may be).
But ACTUALLY being the dumbest motherfucker alive is staggeringly difficult
October 3, 2025 at 5:48 PM
Thoughtful flourishes like those are what separate "Honey, would you like to have lunch with me on Tuesday?" from "Blood of mine own, let us feast at the stroke of noon like pagan kings."

unfortunately im working tuesdays now so i can't make it
September 27, 2025 at 3:02 PM
Oh, that's good then! Um,
September 26, 2025 at 8:14 AM
Been quietly wishing you success on that G-ing TFO goal for several years now, so the obvious conclusion to be drawn here is that my wishes SUCK and are of help to no one. But you are welcome to keep accruing as many of those non-functional little bastards as you like until one of 'em finally works
September 26, 2025 at 8:10 AM
I had to go there because somebody died, which I guess is as good a reason to be there as any. Probably better than yours, actually, which I'm assuming is more like "Somebody was born. It was me. It happened here. So…"
September 26, 2025 at 8:03 AM
(Sorry, I was trying to be coy and non-specific there but I guess all your stalkers just drew a definitive 'X' through Montana on their wall maps anyway, my bad)
September 25, 2025 at 11:41 PM
I had to spend the whole summer in your actual home state and he's kinda not wrong tbh
September 25, 2025 at 11:37 PM
And okay, I know you were dying to know. Enjoy.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=ERI_...
Down the Pub
YouTube video by Hard Skin - Topic
www.youtube.com
September 25, 2025 at 10:19 PM
Damn it, first it was the Roman Empire and now this. Will I ever not be doing it wrong
August 29, 2025 at 7:15 PM
…And if you're wondering why that golden age ever ended, it seems some fool eventually posed the question, "What if lanky men who look like they just got home from a nine-day camping trip aren't going to save the world from capitalism after all?" and that was why 9/11 happened.
July 8, 2025 at 4:27 PM
The "Any vocalist with clearer enunciation than Eddie Vedder or Scooby Doo must be doing it wrong" years were truly a magical time. (Lesser singers used to stuff their cheeks with marbles, just in case.)

Anyway, I hope that whole whatever-it-was worked out okay for these dudes.
July 8, 2025 at 4:27 PM
Just a random ChatGPT joke, although I suppose it *could* do that too, assuming you can somehow convince it to refrain from insisting you are the cyber-messiah sent here to guide the people of Earth through their Digital Awakening, or whatever the fuck stupid thing it keeps doing
July 2, 2025 at 6:11 PM
The 'I' in particular, one imagines.
April 10, 2025 at 11:29 PM