Ms. Murphy if you're nasty, and you most assuredly are
@ellieafterthought.bsky.social
I'm a Swiss Army Unicorn and a born-again misanthrope. I do all my own stunts.
I think that regardless of how I'm feeling tomorrow, I may still stay home.
I at least took a shower and changed my pajamas today, which was... necessary.
Remind me to thank my supervisor for this.
I at least took a shower and changed my pajamas today, which was... necessary.
Remind me to thank my supervisor for this.
a stuffed animal is laying in a bed with a pillow and a blanket .
Alt: Alf, an alien from the planet Melmac, is lying on a couch with a pillow and blankets, with an assortment of medications on a table next to him. He is sick and sneezing. The caption below says, "ME ALL WEEKEND."
media.tenor.com
December 14, 2025 at 11:12 PM
I think that regardless of how I'm feeling tomorrow, I may still stay home.
I at least took a shower and changed my pajamas today, which was... necessary.
Remind me to thank my supervisor for this.
I at least took a shower and changed my pajamas today, which was... necessary.
Remind me to thank my supervisor for this.
Coworker reading headlines this afternoon: Why did we seize an oil tanker off Venezuela?
Me: Force of habit?
Me: Force of habit?
December 10, 2025 at 10:59 PM
Coworker reading headlines this afternoon: Why did we seize an oil tanker off Venezuela?
Me: Force of habit?
Me: Force of habit?
I enlisted an old friend to help me change a headlight bulb in my car. I miss the days when I could fix it myself.
December 7, 2025 at 6:07 AM
I enlisted an old friend to help me change a headlight bulb in my car. I miss the days when I could fix it myself.
My acceptance speech at today's awards ceremony at work:
"Eh... I just show up and let it happen. Thank you."
"Eh... I just show up and let it happen. Thank you."
December 5, 2025 at 4:57 PM
My acceptance speech at today's awards ceremony at work:
"Eh... I just show up and let it happen. Thank you."
"Eh... I just show up and let it happen. Thank you."
I am gracing the workplace with holiday playlists. The first one, due Friday, I am calling, "Adult Contemporary Holiday" with a chill vibe and some old classics mixed in. Next week is the party mix.
Of course, I am open to safe-for-work suggestions...
Of course, I am open to safe-for-work suggestions...
December 3, 2025 at 9:57 PM
I am gracing the workplace with holiday playlists. The first one, due Friday, I am calling, "Adult Contemporary Holiday" with a chill vibe and some old classics mixed in. Next week is the party mix.
Of course, I am open to safe-for-work suggestions...
Of course, I am open to safe-for-work suggestions...
What's a gal gotta do for a coconut donut around here?
December 2, 2025 at 4:00 PM
What's a gal gotta do for a coconut donut around here?
I am so not prepared for today. My bread basket offerings are stunning (photos later), but I had to swap out the winter citrus cake with cranberry buttercream at the last moment because I ran out of time (but who says no to a hot fudge pudding cake?).
November 27, 2025 at 3:37 PM
I am so not prepared for today. My bread basket offerings are stunning (photos later), but I had to swap out the winter citrus cake with cranberry buttercream at the last moment because I ran out of time (but who says no to a hot fudge pudding cake?).
I think the best way to put it today is: I'm... buffering...
a little girl in a blue dress and white shirt is running down a brick sidewalk
Alt: a member of the dance troupe Avantgardey, in a blue dress and white shirt, is miming running down a brick sidewalk
media.tenor.com
November 25, 2025 at 5:24 PM
I think the best way to put it today is: I'm... buffering...
Made another batch of brown butter cookie bars for a bake-off at work. Was just told there are only crumbs left, which is a good sign.
November 18, 2025 at 3:36 PM
Made another batch of brown butter cookie bars for a bake-off at work. Was just told there are only crumbs left, which is a good sign.
I KNOW that at some point, I have said about the Orange Menace, "He'd blow you for a dollar."
I was half-joking. It sounded preposterous! However, if the tale is true, I guess I was right.
I was half-joking. It sounded preposterous! However, if the tale is true, I guess I was right.
November 14, 2025 at 5:43 PM
I KNOW that at some point, I have said about the Orange Menace, "He'd blow you for a dollar."
I was half-joking. It sounded preposterous! However, if the tale is true, I guess I was right.
I was half-joking. It sounded preposterous! However, if the tale is true, I guess I was right.
Zoomer coworker: Can I ask you a question?
Me (thinking it's work-related): Sure, what's up?
That question started with the statement, "My grandmother said..."
Me:
Me (thinking it's work-related): Sure, what's up?
That question started with the statement, "My grandmother said..."
Me:
a man in a blue tank top is saying `` well i never '' while holding his chest .
Alt: Richard Simmons, in a blue spangled tank top, is saying,`` well i never '' while "clutching his pearls"
media.tenor.com
November 13, 2025 at 10:09 PM
Zoomer coworker: Can I ask you a question?
Me (thinking it's work-related): Sure, what's up?
That question started with the statement, "My grandmother said..."
Me:
Me (thinking it's work-related): Sure, what's up?
That question started with the statement, "My grandmother said..."
Me:
November 9, 2025 at 2:53 AM
There was frost on my windshield this morning. I am not ready for this.
November 7, 2025 at 3:43 PM
There was frost on my windshield this morning. I am not ready for this.
@bandlegame.bsky.social in one!
Mild panic when I saw the song was from this year because, yeah...no...
And damn lucky when it was the only song from this year that I could think of!
Mild panic when I saw the song was from this year because, yeah...no...
And damn lucky when it was the only song from this year that I could think of!
November 5, 2025 at 2:34 AM
@bandlegame.bsky.social in one!
Mild panic when I saw the song was from this year because, yeah...no...
And damn lucky when it was the only song from this year that I could think of!
Mild panic when I saw the song was from this year because, yeah...no...
And damn lucky when it was the only song from this year that I could think of!
Tonight, it's Aunty Donna!
you need to stop being such a...
YouTube video by David Björk
youtu.be
November 4, 2025 at 11:30 PM
Tonight, it's Aunty Donna!
...Does this mean I'm getting a day off?
Aw, am I going to have to call people?
Aw, am I going to have to call people?
November 4, 2025 at 12:14 PM
...Does this mean I'm getting a day off?
Aw, am I going to have to call people?
Aw, am I going to have to call people?
Good morning.
This one comes with a brief reprieve from leaving the house in darkness.
This one comes with a brief reprieve from leaving the house in darkness.
Roxy Music - Love Is The Drug
YouTube video by RoxyMusicVEVO
youtu.be
November 3, 2025 at 11:47 AM
Good morning.
This one comes with a brief reprieve from leaving the house in darkness.
This one comes with a brief reprieve from leaving the house in darkness.
Reposted by Ms. Murphy if you're nasty, and you most assuredly are
It would seem that Trump voters elected a house flipper without a contractor's license instead of President of the United States.
October 31, 2025 at 5:11 PM
It would seem that Trump voters elected a house flipper without a contractor's license instead of President of the United States.
Today, I came in as a lumberjack.
It's in the 60s in the city, so here I am, regretting my life choices.
Also, since weaponry in the office is verboten, I carry a can of Axe body spray (which...) and tell folks that "I can't be trusted with sharp objects."
It's in the 60s in the city, so here I am, regretting my life choices.
Also, since weaponry in the office is verboten, I carry a can of Axe body spray (which...) and tell folks that "I can't be trusted with sharp objects."
October 31, 2025 at 3:28 PM
Today, I came in as a lumberjack.
It's in the 60s in the city, so here I am, regretting my life choices.
Also, since weaponry in the office is verboten, I carry a can of Axe body spray (which...) and tell folks that "I can't be trusted with sharp objects."
It's in the 60s in the city, so here I am, regretting my life choices.
Also, since weaponry in the office is verboten, I carry a can of Axe body spray (which...) and tell folks that "I can't be trusted with sharp objects."
Your ear...mollusk... for today.
It's mine, anyway.
It's mine, anyway.
Vulfmon & Zachary Barker - Disco Snails (Official Video)
YouTube video by Vulf
youtu.be
October 30, 2025 at 2:07 PM
Your ear...mollusk... for today.
It's mine, anyway.
It's mine, anyway.
Brown butter M&M cookie bars. Besides regular and mini M&Ms, I added semi-sweet chips, white chips, and sprinkles. My BFF said that it's because I'm "extra". 🤣
So what if I am!
So what if I am!
October 27, 2025 at 10:39 AM
Brown butter M&M cookie bars. Besides regular and mini M&Ms, I added semi-sweet chips, white chips, and sprinkles. My BFF said that it's because I'm "extra". 🤣
So what if I am!
So what if I am!
I'm browning butter for M&M bars I plan on bringing when I crash my cousin's Halloween party later.
I was invited, I just forgot to RSVP.
Now, which costume am I recycling for this?
I was invited, I just forgot to RSVP.
Now, which costume am I recycling for this?
a cartoon character from bob 's burgers is squatting down and looking down .
Alt: Tina Belcher from Bob 's Burgers is twerking .
media.tenor.com
October 25, 2025 at 4:15 PM
I'm browning butter for M&M bars I plan on bringing when I crash my cousin's Halloween party later.
I was invited, I just forgot to RSVP.
Now, which costume am I recycling for this?
I was invited, I just forgot to RSVP.
Now, which costume am I recycling for this?
Bailed on work early tonight to catch Miss M's game. Maybe it's the last of the season?
Last year, she had the team record for most yellow cards in a season.
I think we're both weirdly proud of that.
My niece, the enforcer!
Last year, she had the team record for most yellow cards in a season.
I think we're both weirdly proud of that.
My niece, the enforcer!
October 23, 2025 at 9:23 PM
Bailed on work early tonight to catch Miss M's game. Maybe it's the last of the season?
Last year, she had the team record for most yellow cards in a season.
I think we're both weirdly proud of that.
My niece, the enforcer!
Last year, she had the team record for most yellow cards in a season.
I think we're both weirdly proud of that.
My niece, the enforcer!
I was almost taken out by a low-flying pigeon as I approached the employee entrance at work this morning.
October 23, 2025 at 3:23 PM
I was almost taken out by a low-flying pigeon as I approached the employee entrance at work this morning.