when yall see conservatives say “DEI” you can just replace it with the n-word to understand what they really mean

Having fun watching The Jackal with Eddie Redmayne but can’t help wonder if it would be even better if they added Eddie Method Mayne

He looks like if Tommy Lee Jones ate Sponge Bob.

Back at the Newport for second time in a week.

loading the washing machine and thinking "WET THE DRYS", loading the dryer an hour later and thinking "DRY THE WETS"

Daughter tells me she heard today that if you wear a band T-shirt (especially as a young woman) and a man says to you “name five of their songs”, the correct response is “name five women who trust you”, so I pass this on in case any of you need it

JIMINY GLICK: Now you, you, you, you—your cars, they tend to run over pedestrians. Or else BURST into flames. ha HA isn't that wonderful!
ELON MUSK: *the least convincing laugh of all time*
GLICK: *tucking his legs under himself* You bought a website where no one likes you. Why?