follow me for timely content as always

"They'll require you to sing about how you would absolutely eat shit at sculpting or chemistry or basically any other job"
"Understood sir"

[Diogenes gingerly handing over bag] can't believe you ordered man nuggets

flannel draped over your legs like grunge FDR

making a joke in real life and then repeating it on the Internet like resqueezing a ketchup packet I've already squozen to capacity. "I just know I can get some more Heinz Validation Dopamine out of this"

(AND deleting and redrafting when I notice an error. 100% normal)

...gunpowder treason and plot

I ask for so little yet my nails are still brittle