Disaster Ship Blonde
@disastershipblonde.bsky.social
V, 39. She/her. An old-timey carnival ringmaster exhibiting Izzy Hands like a Fiji mermaid. The home of Foot Guy Hornigold. "She wins" - Con O'Neill. ☭
Fandom account. OFMD and other sad guys on boats. 🔞
Fandom account. OFMD and other sad guys on boats. 🔞
Rough day. It’s time to break out the Christmas cheese.
December 19, 2025 at 7:22 PM
Rough day. It’s time to break out the Christmas cheese.
Izzy Hands.
December 19, 2025 at 7:07 PM
Izzy Hands.
Watching Badgers: Ben has questions about Izzy's plans for Christmas. 🔭🦡
December 17, 2025 at 2:13 PM
Watching Badgers: Ben has questions about Izzy's plans for Christmas. 🔭🦡
She's got six fingers and she wants you to smother your loneliness with a gambling addiction your poverty can't handle.
December 16, 2025 at 4:26 PM
She's got six fingers and she wants you to smother your loneliness with a gambling addiction your poverty can't handle.
There's an especially grotesque bingo ad saturating the TV at the moment, featuring a laughing AI grandma that's obviously ripping off a well-known drag act. Same name and everything. I hate the gambling industry.
December 16, 2025 at 4:22 PM
There's an especially grotesque bingo ad saturating the TV at the moment, featuring a laughing AI grandma that's obviously ripping off a well-known drag act. Same name and everything. I hate the gambling industry.
“Ouwgh. Overdid it. Leave me be.”
December 13, 2025 at 3:24 PM
“Ouwgh. Overdid it. Leave me be.”
Christmas party time! (He says I can have the coleslaw)
December 13, 2025 at 3:16 PM
Christmas party time! (He says I can have the coleslaw)
"So, uh... you wanna see a cool knife trick?"
"Not especially."
<Careless Whisper>
"Not especially."
<Careless Whisper>
December 12, 2025 at 6:06 PM
"So, uh... you wanna see a cool knife trick?"
"Not especially."
<Careless Whisper>
"Not especially."
<Careless Whisper>
Izzy Hands.
December 11, 2025 at 10:26 PM
Izzy Hands.
The aviator jacket is killing me. During WW2, Aussie special ops Nancy Wake's parachute got stuck in a tree in France, and a French resistance guy found her and said "Hon hon hon, I wish all trees could bear such beautiful fruit", to which she responded "Don't give me that French shit."
LE STIZZY.
LE STIZZY.
December 11, 2025 at 6:12 PM
The aviator jacket is killing me. During WW2, Aussie special ops Nancy Wake's parachute got stuck in a tree in France, and a French resistance guy found her and said "Hon hon hon, I wish all trees could bear such beautiful fruit", to which she responded "Don't give me that French shit."
LE STIZZY.
LE STIZZY.
Success! I used a mild carpet cleaner (no bleach, obviously) much diluted in warm water, and then used a toothbrush to apply the solution and carefully scrub. It didn't take much at all.
December 9, 2025 at 11:53 AM
Success! I used a mild carpet cleaner (no bleach, obviously) much diluted in warm water, and then used a toothbrush to apply the solution and carefully scrub. It didn't take much at all.
Someone went on an adventure last night, possibly in a dog's mouth, so today I'm going to gently wash his tiny feet and teach him about personal safety.
December 9, 2025 at 10:24 AM
Someone went on an adventure last night, possibly in a dog's mouth, so today I'm going to gently wash his tiny feet and teach him about personal safety.
Could you not have come up with a less evocative name?
December 8, 2025 at 3:01 PM
Could you not have come up with a less evocative name?
He enjoyed the fair today. Grudgingly.
December 6, 2025 at 1:31 PM
He enjoyed the fair today. Grudgingly.
He’s going to his first Christmas fair tomorrow and we’re taking no chances.
December 5, 2025 at 4:58 PM
He’s going to his first Christmas fair tomorrow and we’re taking no chances.
