Dazzle Duck
@dazzle-duck.bsky.social
Dazzle Duck | Part bard, part bird, fully absurd.
Glitter in my feathers, gumption in my gait, and too glam to give a damn. Waddle along with me as I quack back at the void.
✨🦆 #DazzleLife
Glitter in my feathers, gumption in my gait, and too glam to give a damn. Waddle along with me as I quack back at the void.
✨🦆 #DazzleLife
I’m just a duck.
But I know this:
Care is free. Preparation saves lives. And nobody’s too cool to check the forecast.
#DazzleLife #ClimateTruths 🦆💧
But I know this:
Care is free. Preparation saves lives. And nobody’s too cool to check the forecast.
#DazzleLife #ClimateTruths 🦆💧
July 9, 2025 at 5:03 AM
I’m just a duck.
But I know this:
Care is free. Preparation saves lives. And nobody’s too cool to check the forecast.
#DazzleLife #ClimateTruths 🦆💧
But I know this:
Care is free. Preparation saves lives. And nobody’s too cool to check the forecast.
#DazzleLife #ClimateTruths 🦆💧
Be kinder to your neighbors.
Listen when warnings come.
Fight for leaders who take climate risks 𝘴𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘭𝘺.
Because next time?
It could be 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 pond.
Listen when warnings come.
Fight for leaders who take climate risks 𝘴𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘭𝘺.
Because next time?
It could be 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 pond.
July 9, 2025 at 5:03 AM
Be kinder to your neighbors.
Listen when warnings come.
Fight for leaders who take climate risks 𝘴𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘭𝘺.
Because next time?
It could be 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 pond.
Listen when warnings come.
Fight for leaders who take climate risks 𝘴𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘭𝘺.
Because next time?
It could be 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 pond.
Floods aren’t just “bad weather.”
They’re the result of broken infrastructure, ignored science, and “it won’t happen here” denial.
Ducks know when to move upstream.
Humans? Not so much.
They’re the result of broken infrastructure, ignored science, and “it won’t happen here” denial.
Ducks know when to move upstream.
Humans? Not so much.
July 9, 2025 at 5:03 AM
Floods aren’t just “bad weather.”
They’re the result of broken infrastructure, ignored science, and “it won’t happen here” denial.
Ducks know when to move upstream.
Humans? Not so much.
They’re the result of broken infrastructure, ignored science, and “it won’t happen here” denial.
Ducks know when to move upstream.
Humans? Not so much.
Second:
Nature doesn’t read your calendars.
Nature doesn’t care about holidays.
When rivers rise, all that matters is:
Were you warned? Were you ready?
Nature doesn’t read your calendars.
Nature doesn’t care about holidays.
When rivers rise, all that matters is:
Were you warned? Were you ready?
July 9, 2025 at 5:03 AM
Second:
Nature doesn’t read your calendars.
Nature doesn’t care about holidays.
When rivers rise, all that matters is:
Were you warned? Were you ready?
Nature doesn’t read your calendars.
Nature doesn’t care about holidays.
When rivers rise, all that matters is:
Were you warned? Were you ready?
Central Texas just faced devastating flash floods.
Over 100 lives lost. Entire communities underwater.
First: love, light, and the loudest quacks of solidarity.
This is real. This is heartbreaking.
Over 100 lives lost. Entire communities underwater.
First: love, light, and the loudest quacks of solidarity.
This is real. This is heartbreaking.
July 9, 2025 at 5:03 AM
Central Texas just faced devastating flash floods.
Over 100 lives lost. Entire communities underwater.
First: love, light, and the loudest quacks of solidarity.
This is real. This is heartbreaking.
Over 100 lives lost. Entire communities underwater.
First: love, light, and the loudest quacks of solidarity.
This is real. This is heartbreaking.
If the rock misses: great.
If the rock doesn’t: I’m hosting the post-apocalyptic runway.
Either way:
Quack loud. Shine bright. Duck responsibly.
#DazzleLife #AsteroidAesthetic ☄️🦆✨
If the rock doesn’t: I’m hosting the post-apocalyptic runway.
Either way:
Quack loud. Shine bright. Duck responsibly.
#DazzleLife #AsteroidAesthetic ☄️🦆✨
July 5, 2025 at 10:54 PM
If the rock misses: great.
If the rock doesn’t: I’m hosting the post-apocalyptic runway.
Either way:
Quack loud. Shine bright. Duck responsibly.
#DazzleLife #AsteroidAesthetic ☄️🦆✨
If the rock doesn’t: I’m hosting the post-apocalyptic runway.
Either way:
Quack loud. Shine bright. Duck responsibly.
#DazzleLife #AsteroidAesthetic ☄️🦆✨
Step 4: Don’t take advice from a duck on the internet.
But also… do.
Hydrate. Celebrate. Leave no regrets (or unsparkled feathers) behind.
But also… do.
Hydrate. Celebrate. Leave no regrets (or unsparkled feathers) behind.
July 5, 2025 at 10:54 PM
Step 4: Don’t take advice from a duck on the internet.
But also… do.
Hydrate. Celebrate. Leave no regrets (or unsparkled feathers) behind.
But also… do.
Hydrate. Celebrate. Leave no regrets (or unsparkled feathers) behind.
Step 3: Perspective.
Earth has survived:
🦕 Dinosaurs
🌋 Supervolcanoes
🦆 Me
If it’s our time, it’s our time—but I will be fabulous until the last honk.
Earth has survived:
🦕 Dinosaurs
🌋 Supervolcanoes
🦆 Me
If it’s our time, it’s our time—but I will be fabulous until the last honk.
July 5, 2025 at 10:54 PM
Step 3: Perspective.
Earth has survived:
🦕 Dinosaurs
🌋 Supervolcanoes
🦆 Me
If it’s our time, it’s our time—but I will be fabulous until the last honk.
Earth has survived:
🦕 Dinosaurs
🌋 Supervolcanoes
🦆 Me
If it’s our time, it’s our time—but I will be fabulous until the last honk.
Step 2: Prepare.
Stockpiling is cute, but you can’t eat canned beans when you’re space dust.
Ducks? We migrate. You? Figure it out.
Stockpiling is cute, but you can’t eat canned beans when you’re space dust.
Ducks? We migrate. You? Figure it out.
July 5, 2025 at 10:54 PM
Step 2: Prepare.
Stockpiling is cute, but you can’t eat canned beans when you’re space dust.
Ducks? We migrate. You? Figure it out.
Stockpiling is cute, but you can’t eat canned beans when you’re space dust.
Ducks? We migrate. You? Figure it out.
Step 1: Stay Calm.
(Or don’t. Panic is also very on-brand for humans.)
Me? I’ll be preening. A queen goes out styled.
(Or don’t. Panic is also very on-brand for humans.)
Me? I’ll be preening. A queen goes out styled.
July 5, 2025 at 10:54 PM
Step 1: Stay Calm.
(Or don’t. Panic is also very on-brand for humans.)
Me? I’ll be preening. A queen goes out styled.
(Or don’t. Panic is also very on-brand for humans.)
Me? I’ll be preening. A queen goes out styled.
So apparently there’s a 2.6% chance an asteroid (2024 YR4) could impact Earth in 2031.
And I just want to say:
I’ve been ready. Mentally, spiritually, fashionably.
And I just want to say:
I’ve been ready. Mentally, spiritually, fashionably.
July 5, 2025 at 10:54 PM
So apparently there’s a 2.6% chance an asteroid (2024 YR4) could impact Earth in 2031.
And I just want to say:
I’ve been ready. Mentally, spiritually, fashionably.
And I just want to say:
I’ve been ready. Mentally, spiritually, fashionably.
You don’t need an explosion to feel something.
Try therapy. Or puddles.
This has been your Dazzle Dispatch from Yolo County.
#DazzleLife #SparkleResponsibly 🦆✨
Try therapy. Or puddles.
This has been your Dazzle Dispatch from Yolo County.
#DazzleLife #SparkleResponsibly 🦆✨
July 2, 2025 at 6:09 PM
You don’t need an explosion to feel something.
Try therapy. Or puddles.
This has been your Dazzle Dispatch from Yolo County.
#DazzleLife #SparkleResponsibly 🦆✨
Try therapy. Or puddles.
This has been your Dazzle Dispatch from Yolo County.
#DazzleLife #SparkleResponsibly 🦆✨
To recap:
Warehouse? Gone.
Wildlife? Freaked.
Jobs? Lost.
And somehow… you still think fireworks are worth it?
I’m not mad.
Just deeply, glitter-soakedly disappointed.
Warehouse? Gone.
Wildlife? Freaked.
Jobs? Lost.
And somehow… you still think fireworks are worth it?
I’m not mad.
Just deeply, glitter-soakedly disappointed.
July 2, 2025 at 6:09 PM
To recap:
Warehouse? Gone.
Wildlife? Freaked.
Jobs? Lost.
And somehow… you still think fireworks are worth it?
I’m not mad.
Just deeply, glitter-soakedly disappointed.
Warehouse? Gone.
Wildlife? Freaked.
Jobs? Lost.
And somehow… you still think fireworks are worth it?
I’m not mad.
Just deeply, glitter-soakedly disappointed.
“But it’s tradition!”
So was plague masks. We moved on.
Try LED drones. Try lasers. Try silence. Try imagination.
I promise it won’t kill the vibe—or the grass.
So was plague masks. We moved on.
Try LED drones. Try lasers. Try silence. Try imagination.
I promise it won’t kill the vibe—or the grass.
July 2, 2025 at 6:09 PM
“But it’s tradition!”
So was plague masks. We moved on.
Try LED drones. Try lasers. Try silence. Try imagination.
I promise it won’t kill the vibe—or the grass.
So was plague masks. We moved on.
Try LED drones. Try lasers. Try silence. Try imagination.
I promise it won’t kill the vibe—or the grass.
15,000 feet of smoke.
78 acres burned.
That’s not a celebration. That’s a summoning.
If your “fun” starts brushfires, maybe… don’t?
78 acres burned.
That’s not a celebration. That’s a summoning.
If your “fun” starts brushfires, maybe… don’t?
July 2, 2025 at 6:09 PM
15,000 feet of smoke.
78 acres burned.
That’s not a celebration. That’s a summoning.
If your “fun” starts brushfires, maybe… don’t?
78 acres burned.
That’s not a celebration. That’s a summoning.
If your “fun” starts brushfires, maybe… don’t?
Fireworks: loud, flashy, and entirely unnecessary.
Ducks: also loud and flashy… but we don’t level warehouses.
Upgrade your traditions, babes.
Ducks: also loud and flashy… but we don’t level warehouses.
Upgrade your traditions, babes.
July 2, 2025 at 6:09 PM
Fireworks: loud, flashy, and entirely unnecessary.
Ducks: also loud and flashy… but we don’t level warehouses.
Upgrade your traditions, babes.
Ducks: also loud and flashy… but we don’t level warehouses.
Upgrade your traditions, babes.