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crustaceansingles.com
CrustaceanSingles
@crustaceansingles.com
640 followers 410 following 840 posts
Comics.
My immune system has been eating my brain since 2004, which is fun.
Links: https://linktr.ee/crustaceansingles
The human who makes the comics is Andrew (he/they) BTW
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crustaceansingles.com
Please accept this cube of cubes as a token of my appreciation
A cube of 27 chrome-plated cube magnets sits on a rock in a pot next to a cactus graft.
November 7, 2025 at 10:24 PM
crustaceansingles.com
@firefox.com Firefox once again re-enabled this stupid-ass RAM-hogging bullshit "use AI to suggest tabs and a name for tab groups" setting even though I keep disabling it. Stop shitting up the last decent browser goddamnit
Firefox once again re-enabled its fucking stupid-ass RAM-hogging bullshit "use AI to suggest tabs and a name for tab groups" setting even though I keep disabling it
October 28, 2025 at 5:50 PM
crustaceansingles.com
the shawlpilled cozymaxxer
It is a photo of me, a human wearing a shawl with one end tossed over the opposite shoulder. I think it looks cool. I hope it looks cool.
October 17, 2025 at 12:13 AM
crustaceansingles.com
I've just written something about a really esoteric pursuit of mine, except I wrote it for the dozens of fellow cactus grafting nerds on the internet, meaning it has no glossing or explanations for normals. I posted it free for all to read on my ko-fi:
ko-fi.com/post/Dear-re...
Pictured, a cactus graft in which a seedling of Weberbauerocereus winterianus has been vertically bisected and attached to two correspondingly cut stems of Pereskiopsis 'spathulata'. The scion half in this photo is healthy five days after the operation (as is the other). The photo includes a ruler in the background showing that the scion is about 7 mm tall and not more than 3 mm wide. Pictured, a cactus graft in which a seedling of Weberbauerocereus winterianus has been vertically bisected and attached to two correspondingly cut stems of Pereskiopsis 'spathulata'. The scion half in this photo is healthy five days after the operation (as is the other). The photo includes a ruler in the background showing that the scion is about 7 mm tall and not more than 3 mm wide.
July 30, 2025 at 3:56 AM
crustaceansingles.com
A sign of life: ko-fi.com/Post/A-sign-...
Illustration: Grambo sits in the bare branches of a gnarled and leafless tree that grows on the edge of a cliff. Caption: Sometimes, when you don't hear from me, it's not because things are going bad. / I mean, things are still not great. But that's not why.
July 27, 2025 at 1:04 AM
crustaceansingles.com
Same, bee. #bloomscrolling
On a chilly, breezy morning, a wild bee is nestled in the folds of the bright pink flower of a prickly pear cactus (Opuntia polyacantha). The bee is surrounded by tiny particles of pollen which it has been gathering and perhaps snacking on. In the background, out of focus, a lightly colored pad (cladode, or stem segment) of new growth contrasts with the darker coloration and more profuse spines of last year's growth.
May 19, 2025 at 5:38 PM
crustaceansingles.com
I don't like this one very much. People said they wanted to see the ones I didn't like, so here it is. All told, with constant interruptions and the weaknesses of the fleshy vehicle, it took me at least an hour, which hardly feels worth it.
ALT TEXT: Top panel shows three increasingly close shots of a stick figure in a manic pose with a rictus grin who says, "Look, everybody! I feel fine! I'm not sick and nothing hurts and I have positive feelings about myself and the future! / did I get you? Did I have you going there?" The bottom panel shows two stick figures reacting: "You are so bad at April Fools." "I pity you more and like you less now."
April 1, 2025 at 10:23 PM
crustaceansingles.com
I'm practicing divination by bread-baking & I regret to inform you that we are all thoroughly fucked
#wizardposting
Pictured: a freshly baked loaf of homemade bread with a slightly chaotic shape and nonsensical scoring.
February 25, 2025 at 12:31 AM
crustaceansingles.com
A delightful little tome from the wizard's library
#wizardposting
Pictured: a book with the excessively long title "Fun Nonsense Words to Say Out Loud inside A Candle Pentagram on the Floor (which DEFINITELY won't turn you into a cursed book; they're just FUN TO SAY!)"
February 24, 2025 at 4:15 PM
crustaceansingles.com
Which was in response to the following
(#demonposting)
A demon reclines on the floor, a slice of pizza in hand and a flat, square box labeled "HELL OF A PIZZA" nearby. The slice of pizza has a horrified face on it. "It's the demon equivalent of the weekend. / You can't make me do demon stuff on the demon equivalent of the weekend."
February 24, 2025 at 3:18 AM
crustaceansingles.com
#wizardposting
Four small wizards have congregated near a dirt track in a desert landscape. Caption: It wouldn't be long now. The wind picked up, carrying dust and tumbleweeds. Clouds darkened, and the little band of wizards waited in the desert for the arrival of Joey's mom, who he had promised would bring them snacks.
February 23, 2025 at 8:26 PM
crustaceansingles.com
Wizard hat! #wizardposting
A long-bearded person in wizard attire (robe, pointy wide-brimmed hat, holding a staff) says, "I'm not a wizard, but I do have a wizard hat!" The hat says, "He means I'm a wizard trapped in the form of a hat."
February 23, 2025 at 12:50 AM
crustaceansingles.com
#wizardposting
Panel 1 of 3: a wide shot of a wizard approaching a mysterious arched door. At the top of the arch is an eye that seems to be looking around suspiciously. Panel 2 of 3: the wizard now stands at the door. The eye asks the wizard something unintelligible in a complex and glowing script. The wizard replies, "I seek the legendary savings of WIZARD MART" Panel 3 of 3: closeup on the wizard's face. From out of frame, the eye asks another unintelligible question. The wizard, annoyed, replies, "No, I don't have a *membership*" END
February 22, 2025 at 3:38 PM
crustaceansingles.com
"You say that about everything, Hoarder Wizard."
#WIZARDPOSTING
Panel 1 of 2: a wizard holds a crystal full of darkness and purple and says, "We must seal away the ancient evil!" A warrior with a sword asks, "Why not simply destroy it?" Panel 2 of 2: closeup of the wizard's face. "Well what if we need it later? Did you think of that, smart guy?"
February 22, 2025 at 5:06 AM
crustaceansingles.com
This is the first time in weeks I've felt like some semblance of myself. And, thanks to this unexpected respite, I have emerged from the underworld bearing juice. The juice is for you, my friends. Thank you for being here.
Four panels. First, a stick figure reads small print on the label of a bottle of "GUZZ [cut-off text] J". Second, a closeup on said small print: "Shake well before drinking". Third panel: the stick figure has put the bottle down on a small round table with legs in the form of cephalopod limbs. The figure stands rigidly and shakes their whole body rapidly in place. Fourth panel: the figure holds the bottle up over their mouth while thinking, "I hope that was well enough."
January 14, 2025 at 4:25 PM
crustaceansingles.com
Feeling stuck.
On the ground, a large puddle or small pond. In the sky, fluffy, faceless clouds passing. The puddle/pond thinks, "I miss it, but I can't seem to get back to it."
January 10, 2025 at 3:30 AM
crustaceansingles.com
I haven't forgotten about you, dear readers, and I haven't given up on making comics. As you surely know if you've read more than a handful of my posts, I am permanently Going Through Some Stuff.
Grambo stands almost on a line extending forward from the left and ending in an arrow at the right edge of the frame. Pensively and not without some concern, Grambo thinks, "Time is doing that thing again."
December 31, 2024 at 8:28 PM
crustaceansingles.com
You gotta try it, dude. Changed my LIFE
Panel 1 of 2: a door, open about a quarter of the way, allows a voice to pass outside the room where its unseen speaker is: "I am a serene beast / in the cool of the shade / upon the precipice / of the ambush / my path is inevitable / and none shall deliver". Panel 2 of 2: A person (looking alarmed) says to another (cheerful) "So...I heard what you were saying in there..." The other replies "Just doing my daily affirmations!"
December 15, 2024 at 6:38 PM
crustaceansingles.com
amirite folks
Strap in, folks, cause it's six panels this time. 1: A bird on a branch thinks "Am I safe? Am I safe? Am I safe? Am I safe?" 2: Same bird flying. "Am I safe?" Looks over one shoulder. "Am I safe?" Looks over the other. "Am I safe?" 3: A cat's paw swipes at the bird, who flaps backwards in shock and says "AAAUGHGHCK". A worm poking its head above the soil thinks "Heck?" 4: Bird sitting alone on an electric line. "I'm safe!" Then "*Am* I safe?" 5: Bird pulls a worm from the ground all while thinking "Am I safe?" over and over. The worm thinks "EEEK". 6: A snake has the bird in its jaws. The bird cries "AUGHGHCK". END
December 1, 2024 at 9:07 PM
crustaceansingles.com
This was about a week ago. I am so proud of these little fellas. The seed packets all came from the SLCPL seed library and were all at least four years old, so the germination rate was much better than expected.
Arugula seedlings growing inside a small tunnel greenhouse. Behind them, along the plastic membrane wall, reused bottles and jugs contain water to act as heat storage, built up during the day and slowly released at night.
November 30, 2024 at 1:22 AM
crustaceansingles.com
still, very peaceful
Grambo stands at the bottom of a body of water deep enough to be quite dark. A fish swims by overhead and a pale crab looks up at Grambo. Grambo thinks, "This puddle might be too deep." The crab thinks, "This puddle might not be deep enough."
November 27, 2024 at 7:36 PM
crustaceansingles.com
sup
Photograph; overhead view of a toddler's potty in which a piece of paper with a crayon drawing of a little cartoon cloud with a goofy face. My kid likes playing with little paper characters but I do not know how this one ended up here. Yup. A real mystery.
November 26, 2024 at 4:43 PM
crustaceansingles.com
this is what I have been becoming all along
Grambo, sitting in a puddle, recounts an important tale to a small child, also sitting in a puddle and holding a toy that appears to be a potted branching cactus and the pot has the legs and tail of a Tyrannosaurid dinosaur. And so anyway Grambo says, "So I made a humorous reference to wearing an onion on my belt, which was the style at the time..." The child experiences puzzlement. The end!
November 24, 2024 at 6:55 PM
crustaceansingles.com
This one was only meant to be grafting practice (self-grafting, specifically) but now am calling it Étude in Austrocylindropuntia subulata 003: "Zigged when I shoulda zagged" because I am a real sucker for long titles. Still needs suitable potting and possibly a companion plant; open to suggestions.
Photograph of a small cylindrical cactus of the species Austrocylindropuntia subulata, green with hints of red in the areoles and tiny leaves, sparsely spined and with small tufts of hairs at some areoles. This specimen has been cut at slight diagonals in three places; the pieces were rotated 180 degrees and reattached to the segment from which they were cut. The effect is of a cactus growing in a sharp, unnatural zigzag shape.
November 15, 2024 at 4:07 AM
crustaceansingles.com
I do not claim it will get better—though for all I know, it might—only that there are good reasons to remain. / This is not a sentiment original to me and has quite likely been said before, but it's what's on my mind so here it is in comics form.
In black and white. Red Guy, currently in the form of a sort of flattened ovoid blob, says, "Why do we struggle so to survive? What motivates us?" Blue Guy, a spiky ball, answers with gritted teeth: "Spite, mostly."
November 7, 2024 at 2:57 AM