Clare Blackwood
@clareblackwood.bsky.social
Actor/comedian/writer. Words in The Beaverton, CBC Comedy, McSweeney’s, etc. Pierre Poilievre's personal assistant Mandy. she/her clareblackwood@gmail.com https://buymeacoffee.com/clareblackwood
I wrote my first ever pilot in a week and I'm as proud as a dude on a dating app holding his freshly-caught fish
November 14, 2025 at 12:00 AM
I wrote my first ever pilot in a week and I'm as proud as a dude on a dating app holding his freshly-caught fish
writing a pilot based on poilievre's by-election campaign is turning out to be far more entertaining for me than it has any right to be
November 11, 2025 at 7:09 PM
writing a pilot based on poilievre's by-election campaign is turning out to be far more entertaining for me than it has any right to be
I stay away from Twitter as much as I can these days, but I make an exception for my fave Blue Jay Kevin Gausman. Go off, pitching king, you are singlehandedly healing my broken baseball heart with your delightful spelling of potpourri
November 10, 2025 at 8:07 PM
I stay away from Twitter as much as I can these days, but I make an exception for my fave Blue Jay Kevin Gausman. Go off, pitching king, you are singlehandedly healing my broken baseball heart with your delightful spelling of potpourri
Jesus Christ, StubHub, give a woman time to grieve
November 9, 2025 at 9:32 PM
Jesus Christ, StubHub, give a woman time to grieve
HOW WAS BASEBALL ONE WEEK AGO WHAT THE HELL
November 9, 2025 at 3:53 PM
HOW WAS BASEBALL ONE WEEK AGO WHAT THE HELL
it's true, every workplace I've ever had has burned to the ground because I had too many opinions and rights! pweaze take them away, US Government! send me back to the kitchen! 🥹👉🏼👈🏼
November 8, 2025 at 5:40 PM
it's true, every workplace I've ever had has burned to the ground because I had too many opinions and rights! pweaze take them away, US Government! send me back to the kitchen! 🥹👉🏼👈🏼
When I bring the cheque to the table and everyone starts fighting over who gets to pay
November 7, 2025 at 6:40 PM
When I bring the cheque to the table and everyone starts fighting over who gets to pay
new haircut means you can't sit with me
November 7, 2025 at 4:57 PM
new haircut means you can't sit with me
it actually means you're an unfunny little worm of a man, hope this helps!
November 3, 2025 at 2:09 AM
it actually means you're an unfunny little worm of a man, hope this helps!
filming audition masterpieces to distract from sports pain is truly the actor's way
November 3, 2025 at 1:10 AM
filming audition masterpieces to distract from sports pain is truly the actor's way
A few months ago I was approached by a street photographer, and he just sent me the pictures he took. Even though I was super awkward about the whole thing they look so nice! I feel like I've checked off a City Dweller bucket list item I didn't even know I had!
Shout-out to @visualsofmuz on insta!
Shout-out to @visualsofmuz on insta!
October 31, 2025 at 8:12 PM
A few months ago I was approached by a street photographer, and he just sent me the pictures he took. Even though I was super awkward about the whole thing they look so nice! I feel like I've checked off a City Dweller bucket list item I didn't even know I had!
Shout-out to @visualsofmuz on insta!
Shout-out to @visualsofmuz on insta!
I got this hat at the 2025 Blue Jays' Home Opener and dubbed it my "Humiliation Toque" because we lost 12-2. If you'd told me then that seven months later I'd get to watch them go into Game 6 of the World Series...
Special year. Special team. To me, we've already won (but let's crush 'em anyway).
Special year. Special team. To me, we've already won (but let's crush 'em anyway).
October 31, 2025 at 5:06 PM
I got this hat at the 2025 Blue Jays' Home Opener and dubbed it my "Humiliation Toque" because we lost 12-2. If you'd told me then that seven months later I'd get to watch them go into Game 6 of the World Series...
Special year. Special team. To me, we've already won (but let's crush 'em anyway).
Special year. Special team. To me, we've already won (but let's crush 'em anyway).
People are high fiving on the street
People are chanting
This is amazing
ONE MORE
YAHHHHH
People are chanting
This is amazing
ONE MORE
YAHHHHH
October 30, 2025 at 3:50 AM
People are high fiving on the street
People are chanting
This is amazing
ONE MORE
YAHHHHH
People are chanting
This is amazing
ONE MORE
YAHHHHH
My cat is currently reliving how I watched innings #15-18 of the Blue Jays game at the Rogers Centre last night
October 28, 2025 at 8:52 PM
My cat is currently reliving how I watched innings #15-18 of the Blue Jays game at the Rogers Centre last night
WHY NOT HAVE A FIFTEENTH INNING
October 28, 2025 at 5:37 AM
WHY NOT HAVE A FIFTEENTH INNING
I swore I would never get a player's name on the back of a jersey because jerseys are expensive and I do not trust men in sports, but I will get my favourite one on a t-shirt 💙 #BlueJays
October 24, 2025 at 10:31 PM
I swore I would never get a player's name on the back of a jersey because jerseys are expensive and I do not trust men in sports, but I will get my favourite one on a t-shirt 💙 #BlueJays
I had rollers in my hair for this commercial today, and when we took them out at the end I immediately got cast as Republican Senator's Wife Who is Secretly Running Things Behind the Scenes
October 17, 2025 at 8:25 PM
I had rollers in my hair for this commercial today, and when we took them out at the end I immediately got cast as Republican Senator's Wife Who is Secretly Running Things Behind the Scenes
"Restore the merit principle," I scream, having apparently developed selective amnesia about losing my job based on a complete and total lack of merit
October 14, 2025 at 1:02 AM
"Restore the merit principle," I scream, having apparently developed selective amnesia about losing my job based on a complete and total lack of merit
EVERYTHING IS FINE I AM FINE WE CAN STILL WIN THE GAME HA HA
October 13, 2025 at 11:13 PM
EVERYTHING IS FINE I AM FINE WE CAN STILL WIN THE GAME HA HA
Y'all a friend asked to see pictures of my cat when I first adopted him at eight weeks old, ten years ago, and just LOOK AT HIM my LORD 😭
October 7, 2025 at 10:04 PM
Y'all a friend asked to see pictures of my cat when I first adopted him at eight weeks old, ten years ago, and just LOOK AT HIM my LORD 😭
The picture you send your family group chat when you've had several margaritas and they ask you if you're having fun watching the Blue Jays absolutely wreck the Yankees on a deeply personal level
October 6, 2025 at 2:44 PM
The picture you send your family group chat when you've had several margaritas and they ask you if you're having fun watching the Blue Jays absolutely wreck the Yankees on a deeply personal level
First Blue Jays playoff game ever, but mark my words, lads, it won't be the last. #LightsUpLetsFrigginGo
October 5, 2025 at 7:48 PM
First Blue Jays playoff game ever, but mark my words, lads, it won't be the last. #LightsUpLetsFrigginGo
HASHTAG IN GAUS WE TRUST #BlueJays #LightsUpLetsGo
October 4, 2025 at 7:36 PM
HASHTAG IN GAUS WE TRUST #BlueJays #LightsUpLetsGo