Nut-shaped Hams
@christonacrakr.bsky.social
Thank you God for ducks.
I am kind of a fussy person that likes things to be Nice but today was a lesson in sometimes a janky problem* needs a janky solution*
*poorly installed elfa closet
**cardboard jammed in it so it stops falling off the damn wall
*poorly installed elfa closet
**cardboard jammed in it so it stops falling off the damn wall
June 17, 2025 at 2:36 AM
I am kind of a fussy person that likes things to be Nice but today was a lesson in sometimes a janky problem* needs a janky solution*
*poorly installed elfa closet
**cardboard jammed in it so it stops falling off the damn wall
*poorly installed elfa closet
**cardboard jammed in it so it stops falling off the damn wall
Went to the ice cream place and the ice cream sammy freezer had a padlock on it because apparently some guy kept rolling in and grabbing handfuls of ice cream sammies and running away
June 14, 2025 at 1:16 AM
Went to the ice cream place and the ice cream sammy freezer had a padlock on it because apparently some guy kept rolling in and grabbing handfuls of ice cream sammies and running away
7yo, yell-singing from the pool:
Bees and wasps, are not the saaaaame!
Bees! They barely ever sting, because they don't wanna die from a brooooken butt!
Bees and wasps, are not the saaaaame!
Bees! They barely ever sting, because they don't wanna die from a brooooken butt!
June 8, 2025 at 7:08 PM
7yo, yell-singing from the pool:
Bees and wasps, are not the saaaaame!
Bees! They barely ever sting, because they don't wanna die from a brooooken butt!
Bees and wasps, are not the saaaaame!
Bees! They barely ever sting, because they don't wanna die from a brooooken butt!
Summertime, when children sew floral sardines
June 8, 2025 at 6:08 PM
Summertime, when children sew floral sardines
The fiber content of celery is surprisingly low, what are all those strings doing if not fibering
June 2, 2025 at 5:30 PM
The fiber content of celery is surprisingly low, what are all those strings doing if not fibering
Reposted by Nut-shaped Hams
i’m here you fuckaas bitch
May 28, 2025 at 11:51 PM
i’m here you fuckaas bitch
Waiting to pick up the kids from horse camp and there is an entire pack of mini donkeys rolling like enthusiastic retrievers
May 27, 2025 at 7:01 PM
Waiting to pick up the kids from horse camp and there is an entire pack of mini donkeys rolling like enthusiastic retrievers
I've had a full gallon of water by 3 pm with 2 grams of added salts, just while gardening. This is why tourists always get helicopter rescues when they try to hike here (do not try to hike in the desert in the summer unless you live here please)
May 26, 2025 at 10:42 PM
I've had a full gallon of water by 3 pm with 2 grams of added salts, just while gardening. This is why tourists always get helicopter rescues when they try to hike here (do not try to hike in the desert in the summer unless you live here please)
Pretty sure the self proclaimed succulent lovers do not live in the desert where they turn into monsters that kill their neighbors and set up hideous kingdoms on the corpses of their brethren til you dig them out and face the final boss, the head vampire, a root with a 3 inch circumference
May 26, 2025 at 8:44 PM
Pretty sure the self proclaimed succulent lovers do not live in the desert where they turn into monsters that kill their neighbors and set up hideous kingdoms on the corpses of their brethren til you dig them out and face the final boss, the head vampire, a root with a 3 inch circumference
Oh no 7yos friend has dropped out of sleepover, had to call mom
May 24, 2025 at 4:09 AM
Oh no 7yos friend has dropped out of sleepover, had to call mom
I'm experiencing euphoria about wrapping up school and so many extra curriculars this week. Time to dick around in the pool for a few months
May 21, 2025 at 3:08 AM
I'm experiencing euphoria about wrapping up school and so many extra curriculars this week. Time to dick around in the pool for a few months
I gotta say, 7yo seems remarkably psychologically sound in this journal, like the pinnacle of mental health (she is in fact a goblin, but a mentally well goblin I guess)
May 21, 2025 at 3:07 AM
I gotta say, 7yo seems remarkably psychologically sound in this journal, like the pinnacle of mental health (she is in fact a goblin, but a mentally well goblin I guess)
7yos Thanksgiving essay:
I am thankful for myself because I am me and I love myself.
I am thankful for myself because I am me and I love myself.
7yo's list of good things I just found in her 1st grade school journal:
Dogs
Cats
Bunnys
Tigers
Hot baths
Donuts
Mac and cheese
Pajamas
Dogs
Cats
Bunnys
Tigers
Hot baths
Donuts
Mac and cheese
Pajamas
May 21, 2025 at 3:04 AM
7yos Thanksgiving essay:
I am thankful for myself because I am me and I love myself.
I am thankful for myself because I am me and I love myself.
7yos list of dream weekend plans from same journal:
Wake up
Eat brekkie
Brush teeth
Feed birdie
Go to bookstore
Go to costco
Go to a party
Go home to pet my dog
Wake up
Eat brekkie
Brush teeth
Feed birdie
Go to bookstore
Go to costco
Go to a party
Go home to pet my dog
May 21, 2025 at 3:00 AM
7yos list of dream weekend plans from same journal:
Wake up
Eat brekkie
Brush teeth
Feed birdie
Go to bookstore
Go to costco
Go to a party
Go home to pet my dog
Wake up
Eat brekkie
Brush teeth
Feed birdie
Go to bookstore
Go to costco
Go to a party
Go home to pet my dog
7yo's list of good things I just found in her 1st grade school journal:
Dogs
Cats
Bunnys
Tigers
Hot baths
Donuts
Mac and cheese
Pajamas
Dogs
Cats
Bunnys
Tigers
Hot baths
Donuts
Mac and cheese
Pajamas
May 21, 2025 at 2:54 AM
7yo's list of good things I just found in her 1st grade school journal:
Dogs
Cats
Bunnys
Tigers
Hot baths
Donuts
Mac and cheese
Pajamas
Dogs
Cats
Bunnys
Tigers
Hot baths
Donuts
Mac and cheese
Pajamas
Just fyi my dog took a shit that stuck its landing vertically like a leaning turd tower of Pisa
May 16, 2025 at 1:55 AM
Just fyi my dog took a shit that stuck its landing vertically like a leaning turd tower of Pisa
Have watched enough reels and tiktoks on silent that I can tell if someone has a British accent by the way they move their mouth
May 10, 2025 at 2:07 PM
Have watched enough reels and tiktoks on silent that I can tell if someone has a British accent by the way they move their mouth
The las vegas airport is a sensory nightmare
The only good thing about it is the unhinged slot machine names
The only good thing about it is the unhinged slot machine names
May 3, 2025 at 2:02 PM
The las vegas airport is a sensory nightmare
The only good thing about it is the unhinged slot machine names
The only good thing about it is the unhinged slot machine names
At the county fair and the kids inadvertently spun a wheel at a jesus booth and won a Bible. 7yo sighs loudly and says "ITS JUST SOME BORING BOOK" so pretty sure some evangelical youth are now muttering about my parenting skills
April 26, 2025 at 8:12 PM
At the county fair and the kids inadvertently spun a wheel at a jesus booth and won a Bible. 7yo sighs loudly and says "ITS JUST SOME BORING BOOK" so pretty sure some evangelical youth are now muttering about my parenting skills
Shocking: I wasted a whole workday creating a binder full of templates and shit that are supposed to help me stay on task and not waste entire workdays on side quests
April 25, 2025 at 7:31 PM
Shocking: I wasted a whole workday creating a binder full of templates and shit that are supposed to help me stay on task and not waste entire workdays on side quests
Ugh can we just get locked accounts already?? I do not need 100+ strangers liking my boring post about getting a used bike!!
April 21, 2025 at 7:51 PM
Ugh can we just get locked accounts already?? I do not need 100+ strangers liking my boring post about getting a used bike!!
Just an atheist getting stressed out over trying to celebrate two religious holidays this week for no good reason
April 18, 2025 at 7:52 PM
Just an atheist getting stressed out over trying to celebrate two religious holidays this week for no good reason
when Mother won't let you lick her during workout time
April 16, 2025 at 2:48 PM
when Mother won't let you lick her during workout time
Omg I decided I'd do a super low key seder later this week because we were out of town this weekend so I instacarted a brisket and they brought me one that is SEVENTEEN MOTHERFUCKING POUNDS
April 15, 2025 at 10:33 PM
Omg I decided I'd do a super low key seder later this week because we were out of town this weekend so I instacarted a brisket and they brought me one that is SEVENTEEN MOTHERFUCKING POUNDS
Reposted by Nut-shaped Hams
For your mental health I present: Plum’s paws
April 12, 2025 at 2:48 PM
For your mental health I present: Plum’s paws