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bryan.town
🍂 fall bryan 🍂
@bryan.town
2.5K followers 280 following 9.3K posts
retired sock model | my rat name is “patty cake”

he/him

🏳️‍🌈 🏳️‍⚧️
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bryan.town
Who robbed the Louvre? Right answers only
Carmen Sandiego running away with the less-popular contents of that wing in the Louvre
October 19, 2025 at 8:49 PM
bryan.town
look at this stupid photo and then try to tell me you wouldn’t feel differently about these glasses if stanley tucci was wearing them
a companion photo to the CNN article about Meta’s new smart glasses. It’s a photo of zuckerber wearing chunky black glasses on a black background. The text on the photo reads “mark zuckerberg is making a major bet on the future. He’s about to share it.”
September 15, 2025 at 4:52 PM
bryan.town
right wingers making sure disgruntled children can still have easy access to guns
lord farquad from shrek making a proclamation that says "charlie kirk may die, but that's a sacrifice i'm willing to make"
September 13, 2025 at 3:08 AM
bryan.town
cool handle, man. I think I might know your brother, 3200d0e7a0d971f8c1
A follow notification from 3200d0e7a0d971f8c0.bsky.social
September 13, 2025 at 2:45 AM
bryan.town
uh oh, the mcu defender has logged on, what do I do
someone named Jack quoting my post saying “This is giving 'Seinfeld in the 90s' vibes, where he's just looking to cater to a specific audience and not interested in saying anything new or interesting. Great job, 'Fail Bryan'”
September 9, 2025 at 3:58 PM
bryan.town
the butterfly meme where the guy is labeled “bluesky users” and he’s asking “is this therapy?” gesturing at a picture of the bluesky “post” button
September 8, 2025 at 7:21 PM
bryan.town
hell yeah
screenshot of my notifications with a follow back from martha
August 31, 2025 at 8:49 PM
bryan.town
chat we are so fucking back after the shoulder injury
a lifting rack from the side with a 45lb plate on one side of a barbell. in the background is a lifting bench with a blue base. the whole thing is in a garage with unpainted drywall on the right of the frame
August 28, 2025 at 7:13 PM
bryan.town
what’s wrong babe? you’ve barely touched your donut-prune-cottage-cheese-mayonnaise salad
A recipe for donut prune salad that reads: Here's a crisp, fresh salad that will cause any "meat and potatoes" man to change his mind. Stew 4 prunes for each person. Pit the prunes and stuff with cottage cheese. Place two donuts on a lettuce leaf, fill the donut centers with cottage cheese and then top each donuf with a stuffed prune. Place two whole pitted prunes beside the donuts. Serve with mavonnaise
August 23, 2025 at 4:35 AM
bryan.town
bio updated
a picture of my profile, the words “my rat name is patty cake” have been added to the bio section
August 11, 2025 at 6:42 PM
bryan.town
me irl
an edit of the “hey can we talk?” meme with the text exchange: gray text: Hey can we read the news? blue text: hang on gray text: okay…? [two hours later] blue text: alright I’m drunk let’s read it
June 23, 2025 at 7:13 PM
bryan.town
there’s two kinds of people in this world
two gamecube controllers next to each other on a rug, one is orange and one silver
June 3, 2025 at 8:26 PM
bryan.town
thanks for letting us know
the same skeet but edited to say “toes are my love language”
May 21, 2025 at 11:01 PM
bryan.town
It took me about 5 seconds + the time it took to type my comment

also pretty cathartic to write, though I managed not to swear at them
a confirmation screenshot in green saying “Thank you! Your comment has been submitted to Regulations.gov for review by the the Centers For Medicare & Medicaid Services.”
March 21, 2025 at 5:40 PM
bryan.town
I hate this feature
clippy saying “it looks like you wrote a message to a friend and you’re agonizing over every word before sending it!” “would you like a reminder that you should be your authentic self with your friends because they deserve to know the real you?”
March 1, 2025 at 8:15 PM
bryan.town
a screenshot from the simpsons with a standup comedian holding a mic. in this scene he famously says “that’s the joke”
February 16, 2025 at 7:50 PM
bryan.town
babe your breath stinks, you need some glizzterine
a listerine mouthwash bottle but the color is changed to pink and the label has been edited to say “Glizzterine hot dog mouthwash” with the tagline “glizzy fresh” and a picture of a hotdog. Also there’s a single hotdog in the bottle.
February 8, 2025 at 4:17 PM
bryan.town
so glad they finally added this feature
a “who can interact with this post?” popup that says “Only users with an asymmetric follower count can reply. No one but the author can quote this post.”
February 1, 2025 at 10:39 PM
bryan.town
“let’s hop on Dickscord”

“ummm you mean Discord?”

“that’s what I said, Dickscord”
a picture of McMurray from the show Letterkenny
February 1, 2025 at 5:52 PM
bryan.town
babe what’s wrong you’ve barely touched your olive joy
a wrapped candy bar that looks like an almond joy but is called “olive joy” and sure enough, below the wrapped bar is another image of the bar cut in half so we can see the cross section and it’s a coconut bar topped with a green olive and covered in chocolate. the olives have a pimento in them, which I think is a really important detail because otherwise the balance of flavors would be way off
February 1, 2025 at 2:33 PM
bryan.town
don’t forget the Poo-Pouri!
Poo-Pourri, a product that you spray on the water of the toilet before you poop to make it not smell as much. Original citrus flavor.
January 27, 2025 at 1:56 AM
bryan.town
should I do it?
a dumbwaiter in the wall with elevator buttons for B, 1, 2, 3, etc. it looks like a modern elevator and it’s behind beige metal cabinet doors which are currently open. the compartment is roughly 2 feet cubed, so I could maybe fit if I squished up really small I bet I could do it
January 21, 2025 at 3:13 PM
bryan.town
can I get a hell yeah in chat
four Xbox 360 games arranged in a square on the counter: assassin’s creed 1, assassin’s creed 2, assassin’s creed brotherhood, assassin’s creed revelations
January 20, 2025 at 3:51 AM
bryan.town
kind of surprised microsoft would release an update like this given recent events
a picture of Clippy with a speech bubble saying “it looks like the owner class won't change their ways without the threat or use of violence! would you like help 3d printing a gun?”
January 19, 2025 at 4:43 AM
bryan.town
do you all feed your girlfriends the wet food or the pellets? I want to make sure I’m getting it right
a pint of Ben and Jerry’s Half Baked ice cream a stack of Reese’s peanut butter cups
January 17, 2025 at 3:32 PM