Brandon Burkhart
@brandonburkhart.bsky.social
tex mex gen x comedy writer
BrandonBcomedy.com
BrandonBcomedy.com
Reposted by Brandon Burkhart
Despite stereotypes that unpartnered people are lonely or unhappy, being single doesn’t have to be a burden. The Onion shares tips for embracing single life. theonion.com/tips-fo...
Tips For Embracing Single Life
Despite stereotypes that unpartnered people are lonely or unhappy, being single doesn’t have to be a burden. The Onion shares tips for embracing single life. Take yourself on a date! There’s no reason you can’t have fun being visibly, utterly alone in public. Delight in the bacchanal of carnal pleasures that is the Omaha hookup […]
theonion.com
February 14, 2025 at 9:15 PM
Despite stereotypes that unpartnered people are lonely or unhappy, being single doesn’t have to be a burden. The Onion shares tips for embracing single life. theonion.com/tips-fo...
People who think we don't need DEI have never listened closely to the Bruce Hornsby song "The Way It Is," and it shows.
January 28, 2025 at 6:33 AM
People who think we don't need DEI have never listened closely to the Bruce Hornsby song "The Way It Is," and it shows.
I know every time I've been fired I try to cover my embarrassment by announcing I'm running for governor of Ohio.
January 21, 2025 at 7:27 PM
I know every time I've been fired I try to cover my embarrassment by announcing I'm running for governor of Ohio.
People at the table next to me in this cafe are discussing the conept of FOMO, and it's seriously making me sad I can't be part of their conversation.
January 17, 2025 at 9:58 PM
People at the table next to me in this cafe are discussing the conept of FOMO, and it's seriously making me sad I can't be part of their conversation.
Screenwriters have already gone from "Survive til '25" to "It'll get fixed in '26."
January 6, 2025 at 10:48 PM
Screenwriters have already gone from "Survive til '25" to "It'll get fixed in '26."
Who else is still putting 2004 on your checks, because that's the last time you used them?
January 2, 2025 at 3:12 PM
Who else is still putting 2004 on your checks, because that's the last time you used them?
New episode of The Dump is up! Listen here:
tr.ee/xt5iQCviL2
tr.ee/xt5iQCviL2
December 16, 2024 at 8:47 PM
New episode of The Dump is up! Listen here:
tr.ee/xt5iQCviL2
tr.ee/xt5iQCviL2
Shootings wouldn't happen if Bibles and prayer were allowed in classrooms at this... *checks notes* Christian school.
December 16, 2024 at 6:54 PM
Shootings wouldn't happen if Bibles and prayer were allowed in classrooms at this... *checks notes* Christian school.
My latest Musk Magazine headline. www.instagram.com/themuskmag/
December 15, 2024 at 7:51 PM
My latest Musk Magazine headline. www.instagram.com/themuskmag/
There's a reason why I only write manifestos at Carls Jr. Their slogan is "See something, say nothing." All the food we're eating is so disgusting that no one dares to make eye contact.
December 10, 2024 at 12:44 AM
There's a reason why I only write manifestos at Carls Jr. Their slogan is "See something, say nothing." All the food we're eating is so disgusting that no one dares to make eye contact.
Reposted by Brandon Burkhart
TIRED: Barbenheimer
WIRED: Babygiratu
WIRED: Babygiratu
December 8, 2024 at 9:23 PM
TIRED: Barbenheimer
WIRED: Babygiratu
WIRED: Babygiratu
I'm happy I get to educate the world one fact check at a time.
December 8, 2024 at 5:13 AM
I'm happy I get to educate the world one fact check at a time.
New to MySpace! First post here! DM me to lobby for inclusion in my Top 8!
December 7, 2024 at 7:09 PM
New to MySpace! First post here! DM me to lobby for inclusion in my Top 8!
Reposted by Brandon Burkhart
🚨BREAKING LITERATURE NEWS🚨
My book has a cover.
“Wow, You Look Terrible!” is available April 22 but you can pre-order it now if you’re a real go-getter
books.disney.com/book/wow-you...
Huge thanks to my pal @jimmykimmel.com for writing the foreword, my team at Hyperion Ave, and my artist Jon Kutt.
My book has a cover.
“Wow, You Look Terrible!” is available April 22 but you can pre-order it now if you’re a real go-getter
books.disney.com/book/wow-you...
Huge thanks to my pal @jimmykimmel.com for writing the foreword, my team at Hyperion Ave, and my artist Jon Kutt.
December 4, 2024 at 3:16 PM
🚨BREAKING LITERATURE NEWS🚨
My book has a cover.
“Wow, You Look Terrible!” is available April 22 but you can pre-order it now if you’re a real go-getter
books.disney.com/book/wow-you...
Huge thanks to my pal @jimmykimmel.com for writing the foreword, my team at Hyperion Ave, and my artist Jon Kutt.
My book has a cover.
“Wow, You Look Terrible!” is available April 22 but you can pre-order it now if you’re a real go-getter
books.disney.com/book/wow-you...
Huge thanks to my pal @jimmykimmel.com for writing the foreword, my team at Hyperion Ave, and my artist Jon Kutt.