The Bourbon Drunk Oracle
bourbondrunkoracle.bsky.social
The Bourbon Drunk Oracle
@bourbondrunkoracle.bsky.social
Hiker, hunter, and dam fine cook. Lover of all things nature and most things nerdy.

Beautiful Bearded Bisexual Bigfoot

I can't see the future, I just know what's going to happen.
The real reason Republicans pass Trans Bathroom Bills is so so they can make Femboys use the boys room

How else are they gonna watch them go and sniff the seat afterwards?

Pass it on.
November 26, 2025 at 7:08 AM
Chin up guys.

Maybe if calling for the execution of sitting members of Congress publicly isn't enough to make them do something about him, he'll be in the Epstein files.

They'll totally do something about him then right?

...right?
November 24, 2025 at 10:30 AM
I think the standard for the Presidential Physical Fitness Test should be set on camera by the current president..

Cus Obama would've had out out here working.

But that Trump footage would break the Internet.
November 22, 2025 at 7:08 AM
I really wanna do one of those "100 conservatives v.s. 1 liberal" debates because I wanna see how their brains react to a leftist redneck.

Hard to make the whole "Liberal Soyboy Chuck" jokes when you're talking to a 300lb hillbilly who looks like Leatherface and is eating deer jerky .
November 22, 2025 at 3:48 AM
"what if your favorite celebrity was on the Epstein list?"

I would genuinely believe Steve was diddling the crocodiles before I believed that he would touch a kid.
November 21, 2025 at 12:09 PM
Like Cassandra I scream it from the rooftops and go unheard.

He will start a war to postpone the election.

This will not end till he is dead.

Their eyes are not blind or closed, their hearts are simply too full of hate.

Stock your larder, sharpen your knife, be ready for a hard winter.
November 18, 2025 at 7:48 AM
Show pitch

Gritty modern reboot of...

Clifford the Big Red Dog

Emily Elizabeth realizes as Clifford grows he's going to eat her family out of house and home, so she starts catfishing predators online and letting Clifford eat them.
November 17, 2025 at 3:42 PM
I don't get how men have an issue with trans women.

No cis man is willingly cutting his cock off.

I don't care if it's to watch women pee or win at college swimming, I don't care if it's to save his whole family from a fire.

Not a single Cis man is willingly parting with that appendage.
November 16, 2025 at 2:28 AM
Everybody is saying Bill has the chance to do something hilarious but so does Monica.

"I thought it was weird that he had a tattoo that said 'Donald Was Here' but he said he was just a really big Disney fan."
November 15, 2025 at 1:44 AM
Contagious diseases must love Petsmart

I see so many videos of people taking their dogs in there to slobber all over the toys and choose one and I'm just like...that seems like the equivalent of letting a customer lick every donut to find their favorite.
November 15, 2025 at 1:26 AM
The fact the emails are this damming only increases my growing suspicion the files will contain things like Cannibalism and Human Hunts on the island.

There's no way they're hiding this hard from pedophilia when their base is so accepting of it.
November 14, 2025 at 5:20 AM
In response to the recent Walmart T-shirt controversy it's become apparent that only one thing will save us from fascism and the rise of white supremacy in this country.

Lesbians.
November 14, 2025 at 1:37 AM
Three dudes, sitting on a branch, 5 inches apart cus they're not gay.
November 13, 2025 at 5:48 AM
Their intentionally making the military hostile to women and minorities so that they can purge them from the ranks without outwardly doing so.

So that when they are called upon to go full handmaid's tale, there won't be enough women or minorities within the military to stop them.
November 12, 2025 at 5:36 AM
Democrats and Republicans are both slowly realizing the American people are morons.

But Democrats are realizing it like a parent realizing their teen daughter is a gullible idiot, while Republicans are realizing the same thing from the perspective of her loser boyfriend.
November 12, 2025 at 2:58 AM
The problem with being a rural leftist is that most mainstream leftist media is totally tone deaf to the realities of your life

And the media that does represent your lived experience is almost always conservative coded or at least too afraid to alienate conservatives to take a stance.
November 10, 2025 at 11:39 PM
At this point Democrats are nothing but a paper tiger opposition party, quietly negotiating for their own safety in the coming dictatorship behind closed doors and selling our country out to the Trump party.

Our only hope is he died of natural causes and they tear his empire apart for the throne
November 10, 2025 at 8:16 AM
The reason those on the right feel so comfortable committing political violence is because they know that their leaders and base support it.

The reason those on the left are so hesitant is that they know they'll be disavowed and demonized by their own.

There are no pardons coming for them.
November 10, 2025 at 8:10 AM
In the next 10 years the Florida Keys as you know them now will not exist.

They will be wiped clean by a hurricane so intense the question won't be how many died but how many survived.

Also, Russell Crowe will start going bald.
November 7, 2025 at 9:39 AM
Y'all ever stay at a hotel that had nicer brand free products than what you brought? Then you have to check your receipt to make sure you read the price right and there wasn't an extra zero you missed.

I mean I knew it wasn't Motel 6 but what are you doing giving me Paul Mitchel for free?
November 5, 2025 at 12:32 AM
I think the most depressing part of this whole 10 year fiasco has been realizing how stupid people are.

I mean...I knew they were racist classist self centered entitled pieces of shit.

But I thought they were at least smart enough to know when they were the ones getting screwed.
November 4, 2025 at 10:24 AM
Doctors are incredibly intelligent and analytical minds who have difficulty seeing things clearly because they keep their heads up their own asses.

Nurses exist to be their seeing eye dogs and keep them from knocking over the furniture while they strut around like they're god..
November 4, 2025 at 1:38 AM
The greatest mistake Robert Barathion ever made was marrying Cersi and not just bumping off Aemon Frey and marrying Genna Lannister.

The man's type was Thicc and Curvy and he married the cookie cutter instead of the bowl of oatmeal.

That MILF would've had him saying "Leanna Who?" Night 1
November 2, 2025 at 9:50 AM
The appeal of Isekai Anime to me is just tangible goals.

If I had a bar over my head that said "This many pushups till you don't get winded on hikes" or "This many pages of studying before you understand Mead making" my fuckin hobbies would be so much easier and more engaging.
November 2, 2025 at 9:45 AM
The feral urge to Annie Wilks all the people I see dancing and celebrating starving children right now.

"well if they just worked harder" alright Chet, just hold still for a minute and I'll show you how hard it is to work harder when you're not able bodied.
November 1, 2025 at 6:41 AM