mika
@bodiless.bsky.social
hi, i’m mika
28, they/them
non-binary & bi
former vent user
(username was bodiless)
28, they/them
non-binary & bi
former vent user
(username was bodiless)
functional first ://
anyway i’m really dreading the day my dog dies she’s the only reason i go to my parents’ house and she was what stopped me from moving out of their house for so long i love her so much i want her to live forever
anyway i’m really dreading the day my dog dies she’s the only reason i go to my parents’ house and she was what stopped me from moving out of their house for so long i love her so much i want her to live forever
December 14, 2025 at 11:49 PM
functional first ://
anyway i’m really dreading the day my dog dies she’s the only reason i go to my parents’ house and she was what stopped me from moving out of their house for so long i love her so much i want her to live forever
anyway i’m really dreading the day my dog dies she’s the only reason i go to my parents’ house and she was what stopped me from moving out of their house for so long i love her so much i want her to live forever
vet because i’m not a functional and normal adult and i can’t just make phone calls or talk to a vet and stuff like that. i’d need my parents to help me do that stuff. and like if my cat randomly got sick and my parents couldn’t help idk what i’d do?? so i feel like i have to wait :/// become more
December 14, 2025 at 11:49 PM
vet because i’m not a functional and normal adult and i can’t just make phone calls or talk to a vet and stuff like that. i’d need my parents to help me do that stuff. and like if my cat randomly got sick and my parents couldn’t help idk what i’d do?? so i feel like i have to wait :/// become more
i really wanna get my own pet and i really want to properly take care of them which is what is stopping me. i know my life would improve so much and actually feel meaningful if i got a cat. but i’m worried my apartment is too small for an indoor cat and i’d also be worried about taking them to the
December 14, 2025 at 11:44 PM
i really wanna get my own pet and i really want to properly take care of them which is what is stopping me. i know my life would improve so much and actually feel meaningful if i got a cat. but i’m worried my apartment is too small for an indoor cat and i’d also be worried about taking them to the
and it seems like they don’t even care! like do they want her to just get sick? if her tumor is cancerous, do they want it to spread?
like, when a vet suggests removing a tumor the first thing i want to do is take her to get that tumor removed? not put it off for 6 months or however long it’s been?
like, when a vet suggests removing a tumor the first thing i want to do is take her to get that tumor removed? not put it off for 6 months or however long it’s been?
December 14, 2025 at 11:36 PM
and it seems like they don’t even care! like do they want her to just get sick? if her tumor is cancerous, do they want it to spread?
like, when a vet suggests removing a tumor the first thing i want to do is take her to get that tumor removed? not put it off for 6 months or however long it’s been?
like, when a vet suggests removing a tumor the first thing i want to do is take her to get that tumor removed? not put it off for 6 months or however long it’s been?
to take care of her more!!! like i also had to brush out a lot of her shedding undercoat and i know they would eventually do that but that was the first thing i did when i noticed how much she had been shedding since last time i saw her.
but taking her to the vet feels so important + urgent to me
but taking her to the vet feels so important + urgent to me
December 14, 2025 at 11:34 PM
to take care of her more!!! like i also had to brush out a lot of her shedding undercoat and i know they would eventually do that but that was the first thing i did when i noticed how much she had been shedding since last time i saw her.
but taking her to the vet feels so important + urgent to me
but taking her to the vet feels so important + urgent to me
but she doesn’t act sick like she’s obviously old and more tired but she’s also playful and energetic so she’d probably handle a surgery better now than in the future. i’m scared i’ll go to my parents’ house to see her and notice that she is getting sick and they’re not doing anything. i want them
December 14, 2025 at 11:29 PM
but she doesn’t act sick like she’s obviously old and more tired but she’s also playful and energetic so she’d probably handle a surgery better now than in the future. i’m scared i’ll go to my parents’ house to see her and notice that she is getting sick and they’re not doing anything. i want them
also kinda unrelated but it’s also affecting my mood AHHH seeing my family’s dog made me sad because she’s getting old and she has a tumor in one of her breasts and my dad keeps putting off taking her to the vet to get surgery because my parents are worried about complications i guess? or something?
December 14, 2025 at 11:29 PM
also kinda unrelated but it’s also affecting my mood AHHH seeing my family’s dog made me sad because she’s getting old and she has a tumor in one of her breasts and my dad keeps putting off taking her to the vet to get surgery because my parents are worried about complications i guess? or something?
opening gifts together.
i wish we could just stop doing it but i’m not gonna bring that up. especially since my brother seems to enjoy getting people gifts now even if he usually doesn’t like receiving them
i wish we could just stop doing it but i’m not gonna bring that up. especially since my brother seems to enjoy getting people gifts now even if he usually doesn’t like receiving them
December 14, 2025 at 11:08 PM
opening gifts together.
i wish we could just stop doing it but i’m not gonna bring that up. especially since my brother seems to enjoy getting people gifts now even if he usually doesn’t like receiving them
i wish we could just stop doing it but i’m not gonna bring that up. especially since my brother seems to enjoy getting people gifts now even if he usually doesn’t like receiving them
not enjoy getting him gifts i feel like they have to be perfect or i will end up feeling bad about myself for being such a shit gift giver and sibling. and it’s also worse during christmas because we both feel uncomfortable and like there’s pressure and i think we both dislike the ritual of everyone
December 14, 2025 at 11:03 PM
not enjoy getting him gifts i feel like they have to be perfect or i will end up feeling bad about myself for being such a shit gift giver and sibling. and it’s also worse during christmas because we both feel uncomfortable and like there’s pressure and i think we both dislike the ritual of everyone
suggesting but i wanna get him something actually meaningful and thoughtful and nice not just a thing he mentioned kinda wanting himself.
and my brother keeps getting me nice gifts so i feel like i have to get him nice things back -.-
but he also never hides it if he dislikes a gift which makes me
and my brother keeps getting me nice gifts so i feel like i have to get him nice things back -.-
but he also never hides it if he dislikes a gift which makes me
December 14, 2025 at 10:57 PM
suggesting but i wanna get him something actually meaningful and thoughtful and nice not just a thing he mentioned kinda wanting himself.
and my brother keeps getting me nice gifts so i feel like i have to get him nice things back -.-
but he also never hides it if he dislikes a gift which makes me
and my brother keeps getting me nice gifts so i feel like i have to get him nice things back -.-
but he also never hides it if he dislikes a gift which makes me
sensitive before my period as well. i’m just like. great so the feelings i’m experiencing aren’t actually real then!! because they’re being caused by hormones. anyway with me feeling depressed both as a teen and right now i do think multiple things affect it and play a role in it, not just hormones
December 11, 2025 at 8:15 PM
sensitive before my period as well. i’m just like. great so the feelings i’m experiencing aren’t actually real then!! because they’re being caused by hormones. anyway with me feeling depressed both as a teen and right now i do think multiple things affect it and play a role in it, not just hormones
and i felt so bad and like my depression hadn’t actually been real because it was caused by my hormones/a physical disorder. and i feel differently about that now but i guess there’s still some of that attitude left 🤔 idk why my brain does that -_-
it’s also like that if i like. feel emotionally
it’s also like that if i like. feel emotionally
December 11, 2025 at 8:13 PM
and i felt so bad and like my depression hadn’t actually been real because it was caused by my hormones/a physical disorder. and i feel differently about that now but i guess there’s still some of that attitude left 🤔 idk why my brain does that -_-
it’s also like that if i like. feel emotionally
it’s also like that if i like. feel emotionally
i guess i’m also just scared in general that the landlord and landlady will be mad at me. even though i know they wouldn’t. i’m always scared i’m being loud or using too much hot water or electricity in general or i’m somehow doing something wrong that i don’t even know that will make them hate me
December 9, 2025 at 8:27 PM
i guess i’m also just scared in general that the landlord and landlady will be mad at me. even though i know they wouldn’t. i’m always scared i’m being loud or using too much hot water or electricity in general or i’m somehow doing something wrong that i don’t even know that will make them hate me
lmao -.- idk -.- ugh -.-
December 9, 2025 at 8:24 PM
lmao -.- idk -.- ugh -.-
which sounds kinda extreme? but it’s how i felt. and all i wanted was to go back to my apartment to be alone and not talk to anyone and not be seen and not be a bother to people but now i feel like i’m being a bother even when i’m showering and taking care of myself because the cabinet is so rotten
December 9, 2025 at 8:23 PM
which sounds kinda extreme? but it’s how i felt. and all i wanted was to go back to my apartment to be alone and not talk to anyone and not be seen and not be a bother to people but now i feel like i’m being a bother even when i’m showering and taking care of myself because the cabinet is so rotten
anyway they’re nice so i’m sure they wouldn’t be mad at me. i’m still worried about it though. and i think they’re aware the bathroom is pretty shitty. like they made it. and they probably did it as cheaply as they could too
December 9, 2025 at 7:55 PM
anyway they’re nice so i’m sure they wouldn’t be mad at me. i’m still worried about it though. and i think they’re aware the bathroom is pretty shitty. like they made it. and they probably did it as cheaply as they could too
tiny shower like that!!! but idk if i should tell them or not or just wait until i move out. the bathroom has bigger problems like there’s clearly a mold issue with the walls and floor. i just try to keep the floor as dry as possible but that’s something they’ll have to decide if they wanna fix
December 9, 2025 at 7:52 PM
tiny shower like that!!! but idk if i should tell them or not or just wait until i move out. the bathroom has bigger problems like there’s clearly a mold issue with the walls and floor. i just try to keep the floor as dry as possible but that’s something they’ll have to decide if they wanna fix
when i shower but that means the wooden cabinet gets wet every time and it is looking kinda rotten and a small piece at the bottom just fell off and i’m scared i’ve somehow messed up but i didn’t design the bathroom i’m just trying to live and be comfortable. like i’m fat i can’t squeeze myself in a
December 9, 2025 at 7:49 PM
when i shower but that means the wooden cabinet gets wet every time and it is looking kinda rotten and a small piece at the bottom just fell off and i’m scared i’ve somehow messed up but i didn’t design the bathroom i’m just trying to live and be comfortable. like i’m fat i can’t squeeze myself in a
people but having fucked yourself by isolating yourself for years and being too terrified to ask for what you need or reach out or try to be with people and try to be vulnerable. it’s like i’m just doomed to be alone and never get what i need and i’m just hopeless and broken
December 9, 2025 at 1:18 AM
people but having fucked yourself by isolating yourself for years and being too terrified to ask for what you need or reach out or try to be with people and try to be vulnerable. it’s like i’m just doomed to be alone and never get what i need and i’m just hopeless and broken
and comforted :) normal human stuff i guess :) but i’m alone :) and i’m always alone :) it’s kind of like i don’t exist :) like the real me :) the one with feelings and needs and wants :)
it’s a difficult feeling :) being so isolated and far away from everyone/anyone else and feeling like you need
it’s a difficult feeling :) being so isolated and far away from everyone/anyone else and feeling like you need
December 9, 2025 at 1:14 AM
and comforted :) normal human stuff i guess :) but i’m alone :) and i’m always alone :) it’s kind of like i don’t exist :) like the real me :) the one with feelings and needs and wants :)
it’s a difficult feeling :) being so isolated and far away from everyone/anyone else and feeling like you need
it’s a difficult feeling :) being so isolated and far away from everyone/anyone else and feeling like you need