Beef
@beef19.bsky.social
I like obscure references and tongue-in-cheek humor and I like Philly sports teams but I don’t like run on sentences or poor grammar or punctualization
I was told guns make everyone safer
January 25, 2026 at 1:50 AM
I was told guns make everyone safer
I think my New Year’s resolution this year is to stop being so pleasant and to really hone in and exploit people’s insecurities. Like Jiminy Glick.
December 31, 2025 at 4:29 PM
I think my New Year’s resolution this year is to stop being so pleasant and to really hone in and exploit people’s insecurities. Like Jiminy Glick.
Just wait until the postseason when the Eagles unleash the offensive plays they’ve been keeping under wraps all year [he said super confidently but inside his brain twitched violently knowing what a desperate hail mary it was]
December 30, 2025 at 9:57 PM
Just wait until the postseason when the Eagles unleash the offensive plays they’ve been keeping under wraps all year [he said super confidently but inside his brain twitched violently knowing what a desperate hail mary it was]
Icarus loved the D too much
Imagine being launched into the sun. You'd literally die of a Vitamin D overdose
December 13, 2025 at 3:37 PM
Icarus loved the D too much
It’s windshield scraping season! I hate windshield scraping season.
December 8, 2025 at 1:32 PM
It’s windshield scraping season! I hate windshield scraping season.
At the end of Goonies, Chunk tells Sloth that Sloth is going to live with him now. Putting aside the fact that Chunk doesn’t even give Sloth a choice, the bigger problem is Chunk doesn’t even ask his parents first. In this detailed analysis I examine the generational breakdown of parent-child dynam
October 30, 2025 at 10:33 PM
At the end of Goonies, Chunk tells Sloth that Sloth is going to live with him now. Putting aside the fact that Chunk doesn’t even give Sloth a choice, the bigger problem is Chunk doesn’t even ask his parents first. In this detailed analysis I examine the generational breakdown of parent-child dynam
Reposted by Beef
I've built a socioeconomic system that depends on everyone to do useful work and act ethically except the people at the top, who get unimaginable rewards for being antisocial frauds and criminals. And I think it will stand the test of time
October 28, 2025 at 7:16 PM
I've built a socioeconomic system that depends on everyone to do useful work and act ethically except the people at the top, who get unimaginable rewards for being antisocial frauds and criminals. And I think it will stand the test of time
“Can’t Stop Won’t Stop” -Grammy nominated artist Bikini Seagull
July 20, 2025 at 5:18 PM
“Can’t Stop Won’t Stop” -Grammy nominated artist Bikini Seagull
If you’re good at Photoshop, I’ve got a goldmine for you: A pic of actor Eddie Redmayne, in heavy metal clothing and makeup, with the caption: “Eddie Mudvayne.” You’re welcome.
May 14, 2025 at 4:39 PM
If you’re good at Photoshop, I’ve got a goldmine for you: A pic of actor Eddie Redmayne, in heavy metal clothing and makeup, with the caption: “Eddie Mudvayne.” You’re welcome.
Reposted by Beef
I think it's bad that the country is led by people who haven't had a real problem in their entire lives and couldn't get a regular job due to being too weird
April 11, 2025 at 3:27 PM
I think it's bad that the country is led by people who haven't had a real problem in their entire lives and couldn't get a regular job due to being too weird
The only wolf I want resurrected is Airwolf
April 10, 2025 at 8:33 PM
The only wolf I want resurrected is Airwolf
Reposted by Beef
Trump's tariffs drive economy off a cliff. Thanks, Republicans. You wanted this.
My column on the dumbest damn thing I've ever seen:
www.usatoday.com/story/opinio...
My column on the dumbest damn thing I've ever seen:
www.usatoday.com/story/opinio...
Trump's tariffs drive economy off a cliff. Thanks, Republicans. You wanted this. | Opinion
As Trump's ludicrous tariffs tank the economy, I hope Republicans are happy. This is what they voted for.
www.usatoday.com
April 3, 2025 at 7:27 PM
Trump's tariffs drive economy off a cliff. Thanks, Republicans. You wanted this.
My column on the dumbest damn thing I've ever seen:
www.usatoday.com/story/opinio...
My column on the dumbest damn thing I've ever seen:
www.usatoday.com/story/opinio...
It sure seems like we have April Fools running all three branches of government right now IMHO
April 1, 2025 at 12:12 PM
It sure seems like we have April Fools running all three branches of government right now IMHO
Reposted by Beef
We're making all your websites shitty and evil. What are you gonna do, log off and spend time with your family
January 14, 2025 at 10:45 PM
We're making all your websites shitty and evil. What are you gonna do, log off and spend time with your family
If I have a vice, I guess it has to be smelling the inside of fruit snacks packages for far too long before I throw them away
January 4, 2025 at 5:35 PM
If I have a vice, I guess it has to be smelling the inside of fruit snacks packages for far too long before I throw them away
Making sure no one at work ever attempts small talk at the water cooler again: “Is this Nosoupferyoutwo show really as good as people are saying?”
December 27, 2024 at 10:34 PM
Making sure no one at work ever attempts small talk at the water cooler again: “Is this Nosoupferyoutwo show really as good as people are saying?”
“Look at this fuggin guy.” -Pepper Leach, Major League
The lawyer helping Robert F. Kennedy Jr. pick federal health officials for the incoming Trump administration has petitioned the government to revoke its approval of the polio vaccine, which for decades has protected millions of people from a virus that can cause paralysis or death.
Kennedy’s Lawyer Has Asked the F.D.A. to Revoke Approval of the Polio Vaccine
Aaron Siri, who specializes in vaccine lawsuits, has been at Robert F. Kennedy Jr.’s side reviewing candidates for top jobs at the Department of Health and Human Services.
www.nytimes.com
December 13, 2024 at 6:34 PM
“Look at this fuggin guy.” -Pepper Leach, Major League
My brain while reading this: why would the Marlins trade for a slug… I wonder if marlins eat slugs… there’s a burger ad under a headline about Burger… I guarantee a Marlin would love a burger… man I’m hungry… @mlb.com
December 11, 2024 at 3:08 PM
My brain while reading this: why would the Marlins trade for a slug… I wonder if marlins eat slugs… there’s a burger ad under a headline about Burger… I guarantee a Marlin would love a burger… man I’m hungry… @mlb.com
Just like Jack Reacher can’t get past the shooter supposedly paying for parking because it just doesn’t add up, I can’t get past this guy choosing to enter a McDonald’s. Why not use the drive through?
December 10, 2024 at 12:12 AM
Just like Jack Reacher can’t get past the shooter supposedly paying for parking because it just doesn’t add up, I can’t get past this guy choosing to enter a McDonald’s. Why not use the drive through?