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bastardfalcon.bsky.social
Bastard Falcon
@bastardfalcon.bsky.social
30 followers 55 following 21 posts
Catholic, husband, history teacher, gamer, lover of dogs and cats.
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Reposted by Bastard Falcon
lifeisamazing.bsky.social
Sauron, in The Lord of The Rings is a mysterious figure. I imagine him there at the top of his tower and suddenly see him for who he is. Today's homage to Tolkien...

@neilhimself.neilgaiman.com, thought you might like this one.
Sauron When it comes to Dark Lords, I’m the Darkest Darkest Dark Lord. No Dark Lord is Darker than me Not one. I was saying to Saruman just the other day Saruman, nice guy, but, he’s not me. Wants to be, but no. I said: Sure, you’re Saruman the White And that’s okay, that’s your thing But I know everything there is about Dark Lords. You see, I’m a smart guy Smartest Dark Lord you’ll meet. Ever I have a volcano No-one else has a volcano I call it Mount Doom, actually It’s kind of a play on words – like “doom and gloom” because it’s got an atmosphere. Great atmosphere. You should come. It’s where we incinerate documents Oh, and people, when I fire them It’s by the orc training ground which we call The Golf Course. That’s on the Plat-eau, the Plat-eau of Gorgoroth actually that’s Golforoth: The guy who wrote it couldn’t spell. I fired him. I said: “JRR, maybe you need to go to school. – We’re getting the signs changed. They’ll be the best signs. (Cont'd next image) 18 holes. Great course and the views... The clubhouse is at Minas Morgul That’s pronounced Mogul. After my other job I win every time. Nazgul, orcs, trolls, balrogs – no-one ever beats me In all these thousands of years. No-one’s better than me at golf Never. Think of that. It shows, doesn’t it – who’s best at golf? You don’t need to answer that It’s a rhetorical question, rhetorical questions don’t have answers (– It’s me, by the way.) At the top of Barad-Dur I look out over Middle-Earth. Barad-Dur’s my tower. It means: Dark Tower. It’s named after me. I’m the Dark Lord. Did I mention that? I have great eyesight. My eyesight is so great, I had them tested. The Orctician said: “You’ve got great eyesight.” There’s this flame around me. A big, beautiful flame. So beautiful. So bright. It burns and burns in the shape of an eye. It’s the biggest eye, actually. It’s big. It’s orange. (The picture is the flaming eye of Sauron, from The Lord of the Rings movie, by Peter Jackson)
June 16, 2024 at 7:17 AM
Reposted by Bastard Falcon
lifeisamazing.bsky.social
The true story of how Gollum got to speak like that.

Today Tolkien homage.

Thought you might enjoy, @neilhimself.neilgaiman.com
Gollum Truth is, I don't speak like that. I mean, I know I was rude to John Ronald one day, down the pub, because I said, "JRR, are you going to put those bloody stupid hobbits in your book?" - and he was all like "What do you mean, 'bloody stupid hobbits'?" and I was like: "Cutesy, hairy feet and all eleventy-first birthdays – bleurgh" - and he was like: "Do you want to take it outside?" Well, I took a breath then. Coz, you know, he is the author. So I said: "Nah, you're all right, matey mateses." And that was that. Next thing, it's: "What has he got in his pocketses?" and "Bagginses, I hates Bagginses." It was a joke. I was just trying to keep it light. That's not how I talk. It's not how I bloody talk. But master takes hold of my wordses, see? And he makes them all horrid, filthy, nasty wormy wordses. And we wishes we had taken it outsides, when we had the chance, doesn't we, precious? (Damn it, there he bloody goes again.) [COMPLETE ON NEXT IMAGE] Coz then we'd have showed him, we would have sneaked up and strangled the nasty writery typeses we would have bit and flicked and kicked him so hard in all the nasty dark places, Yesss! My precious, yesss! We'd have kicked him so hard, Until he knowed what he had in his pocketses. (A picture of The Eagle and Child, a pub in St Giles, Oxford, where the group of writers called the Inklings met. This group included C S Lewis and Tolkien, among others. A cream traditional pub frontage, looking like a mid-Victorian building, with trees behind, on an Oxford street.)
June 10, 2024 at 3:01 PM
bastardfalcon.bsky.social
Gets played on the regular regular in my household. One of the greatest sitcoms of all time.
Sophia Petrillo Golden Girls GIF
ALT: Sophia Petrillo Golden Girls GIF
media.tenor.com
June 10, 2024 at 3:06 AM
bastardfalcon.bsky.social
Looks delish, and the plating is on point!
June 10, 2024 at 1:57 AM
bastardfalcon.bsky.social
Cover art for The Bonehunters by Steven Erikson and Scott Pilgrim's Precious Little Life Vol. 1 by Bryan Lee O'Malley
June 7, 2024 at 11:19 PM