Barnyard
@barnyard.bsky.social
I'm a jerk, I'm a punk took a shower 'cause I stunk
Back when I was like 11 or 12, my mom was dating this guy who worked at Carl’s Jr. he used to bring me the wildest concoctions I could ask for. Like a chicken sandwich on sourdough with guacamole. I’m still mad that she broke up with him.
June 17, 2025 at 11:21 PM
Back when I was like 11 or 12, my mom was dating this guy who worked at Carl’s Jr. he used to bring me the wildest concoctions I could ask for. Like a chicken sandwich on sourdough with guacamole. I’m still mad that she broke up with him.
The person who wrote the song “Tomorrow” for Annie obviously didn’t have clinical depression
March 2, 2025 at 6:25 PM
The person who wrote the song “Tomorrow” for Annie obviously didn’t have clinical depression
It’s funny when a 2 year old keeps trying to pronounce “Grinch” but it sounds like she’s saying she wants to watch a movie called “Bitch”
December 8, 2024 at 5:24 AM
It’s funny when a 2 year old keeps trying to pronounce “Grinch” but it sounds like she’s saying she wants to watch a movie called “Bitch”
Choate is a chode. This fucking guy shouldn’t be anywhere near a college football team.
December 1, 2024 at 3:54 AM
Choate is a chode. This fucking guy shouldn’t be anywhere near a college football team.
Either I have shitty taste (very possible) or people are being way hypercritical of the Umbrella Academy season 4. I thought it was pretty good. 🤷
August 9, 2024 at 6:44 AM
Either I have shitty taste (very possible) or people are being way hypercritical of the Umbrella Academy season 4. I thought it was pretty good. 🤷
Eddie Olcyzk is fucking moron “oh there’s one two three four…. Oh wait just trust me there’s six out there” god the world would be a better place without him
May 10, 2024 at 4:02 AM
Eddie Olcyzk is fucking moron “oh there’s one two three four…. Oh wait just trust me there’s six out there” god the world would be a better place without him
All of you piece of shit rednecks in Dallas can eat my ass and lick my taint
May 10, 2024 at 3:33 AM
All of you piece of shit rednecks in Dallas can eat my ass and lick my taint
Russell Wilson can cook and eat my ass
December 3, 2023 at 9:29 PM
Russell Wilson can cook and eat my ass
Big PP for the Avs tonight
October 22, 2023 at 2:45 AM
Big PP for the Avs tonight
Shoutout to the person being so drunk they’re getting kicked out of Six Flags. That person is me.
October 9, 2023 at 2:00 AM
Shoutout to the person being so drunk they’re getting kicked out of Six Flags. That person is me.
Based
Rep Jamaal Bowman appears to have pulled a fire alarm in order to give Dems more time to read continuing resolution bill.
September 30, 2023 at 8:21 PM
Based
Reposted by Barnyard
Hurricane Hilary (okay tropical storm Hilary) is going to brush an arm over several incredible places including: Tonopah, Nevada’s clown motel (next to a graveyard), the dunes in the Mojave where I nearly stepped on a scorpion at night, and the ORIGINAL LONDON BRIDGE in Lake Havasu
![Picture of faded clown motel sign, including image of juggling clown and oddly spaced marquee reading “single [large gap] t
clanr o o m
Pets ok dish tv”
On a striped pole in a mostly empty town of low buildings with bare desert hills in the background](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:kb75e3lsm76kqwaxicpsezar/bafkreig7sfgsfashuhti2zbj3sfj34utcstwh3z7m3iddbwntkb5b6x5aq@jpeg)
August 19, 2023 at 2:51 PM
Hurricane Hilary (okay tropical storm Hilary) is going to brush an arm over several incredible places including: Tonopah, Nevada’s clown motel (next to a graveyard), the dunes in the Mojave where I nearly stepped on a scorpion at night, and the ORIGINAL LONDON BRIDGE in Lake Havasu
I will write a Mrs. Met fan fiction to someone if they bring me a Grim Leafer Liquid Death right now.
August 19, 2023 at 3:52 AM
I will write a Mrs. Met fan fiction to someone if they bring me a Grim Leafer Liquid Death right now.
I don’t sleep very well anymore. Maybe it’s the two kids. Maybe work related stress. Maybe it’s the relentless flow of time that seems to only go faster as I get older. Or maybe it’s the booze.
August 15, 2023 at 6:46 AM
I don’t sleep very well anymore. Maybe it’s the two kids. Maybe work related stress. Maybe it’s the relentless flow of time that seems to only go faster as I get older. Or maybe it’s the booze.
Reposted by Barnyard
Republicans are pure evil.
Republicans Hate You And Want You Dead ☠️
August 15, 2023 at 12:07 AM
Republicans are pure evil.
Yeah, I’m religious. I believe in the Holy Trinity.
August 12, 2023 at 3:14 PM
Yeah, I’m religious. I believe in the Holy Trinity.
Reposted by Barnyard
If you're gonna go out on Twitter, this is the way
August 11, 2023 at 11:34 PM
If you're gonna go out on Twitter, this is the way
I’m glad that both of my kids are napping at the same right now. It’s like they’re programmed to be anti-sleep terrorists and wake up each other when the other is sleeping.
August 9, 2023 at 11:24 PM
I’m glad that both of my kids are napping at the same right now. It’s like they’re programmed to be anti-sleep terrorists and wake up each other when the other is sleeping.
I remember that it wasn’t even at work. It was while on break or after work just in uniform.
August 9, 2023 at 5:08 AM
I remember that it wasn’t even at work. It was while on break or after work just in uniform.
Reposted by Barnyard
One of our greatest failures as a society is that "business shorts" never caught on.
August 8, 2023 at 1:24 PM
One of our greatest failures as a society is that "business shorts" never caught on.