Bar Mageddon
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barmageddon.bsky.social
Bar Mageddon
@barmageddon.bsky.social
4.4K followers 510 following 17K posts
Writer, millennial, certified baby whisperer. My phone has been on silent since 2011 and everyone can just deal with it. What Would Jim Larkin Do?

sports alt: https://bsky.app/profile/robadelphia.gobirds.online
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barmageddon.bsky.social
screenshot of text that reads: The Edge of Oblivion Mageddon, 41, lives in a bland suburban enclave in the heart of Delaware where the beaks of dim-witted cardinals rat-a-tat-tat against their reflections in his windows and three copies of “How to Sharpen Pencils” - a book he was lying on the floor reading when I arrived - sit on a pile of unopened credit card company correspondence that dominates his dining room. He periodically interrupted the interview to step out onto his back deck and vehemently scratch his balls in the direction of a neighbor’s barking dog, a Tom Waits song come to life.
November 15, 2025 at 1:24 PM
barmageddon.bsky.social
oh no we’re in a loop
screenshot of bluesky conversation from march 2025. fun says they have a book called writing movies for profit and it’s a hilarious read. i reply saying thomas lennon is a real gem and top shelf podcast guest
November 15, 2025 at 7:54 AM
barmageddon.bsky.social
image of actor jason biggs in american pie looking contemplative. It’s from the scene where he decides to fuck a pie.
November 14, 2025 at 7:14 PM
barmageddon.bsky.social
part of the cat-sitting thank you package my sister and brother-in-law sent me home with

“this is good” “this is spicy” i’ll be the judge of that
photo of a sealed container of buldak carbonara spicy ramen sitting on a kitchen counter
November 11, 2025 at 11:09 AM
barmageddon.bsky.social
old black and white image of legendary journalist edward r. murrow talking into a microphone with papers in his hands. text says "and now the news." a speech bubble implies he is saying whatever this post is quoting.
November 10, 2025 at 5:08 AM
barmageddon.bsky.social
lmao
still image from the show detroiters. tim and lea are in the office. tim has his hands up and is yelling something to the ceiling. tim is also blurry because he is in motion. subtitle says “shut up, lea!”
November 10, 2025 at 3:35 AM
barmageddon.bsky.social
image from the mamdani sign generator that lets you write a slogan in the style of mamdani’s zohran for new york city. this says in all caps shut up, and then beneath it says for vo
November 9, 2025 at 4:22 AM
barmageddon.bsky.social
image from the mamdani sign generator that lets you write a slogan in the style of mamdani’s zohran for new york city. this says in all caps L I P. and beneath in a smaller font it says “is the opposite of clown.” it’s a visual gag based on the idea that capital L and I next to each other vaguely resemble the letter U, and lowercase C and L next to each other vaguely resemble the letter D. so it vaguely looks like it’s saying up is the opposite of down. it’s really dumb and not even funny and a complete waste of everyone’s attention. i will never stop posting it.
November 9, 2025 at 2:03 AM
barmageddon.bsky.social
i’m not one to talk about animals as if they are my relatives (no shade it’s just that i have so many human relatives already) but if i were, this would be my nephew zuko
photo of a house cat walking on a wooden floor. it’s head is almost tabby-like with brown around the eyes and ears and top of the head with black striping, but a white streak runs between its eyes down to its nose and mouth and extends to its chest and legs. the body is large splotches of black on white with a mostly black tail. it’s a distinguished looking adult cat that looks younger than it is
November 7, 2025 at 9:23 PM
barmageddon.bsky.social
what time is it?

it’s cat o’clock
November 7, 2025 at 9:07 PM
barmageddon.bsky.social
sometimes people randomly like an old post and it makes me laugh
screenshot of a notification that julesington liked my post. the post says please, my trains, they are white patriarchy
November 7, 2025 at 3:02 AM
barmageddon.bsky.social
screenshot of text conversation. first person says I D K you have unc behaviors king. i think it’s allowed. cuncle sounds wrong so we won’t go there. then i respond: now that i have the permission of a white lady, unc rob it is
November 6, 2025 at 8:15 PM
barmageddon.bsky.social
it’s the same picture
iconic image of tank man in tiananmen square, a lone civilian with a bag stands defiantly in front of a tank column sean dunn, the sandwich thrower, holds a wrapped hoagie a second before he hurled it at a federal officer in DC
November 6, 2025 at 7:58 PM
barmageddon.bsky.social
slightly cropped image of a painting by cezanne showing a bearded man with his head tilted forward and to the side so that his gaze is directed off screen. his expression is mostly blank, but based on the half-closed eyes and slightly raised brow, one might imagine he is staring at something that he is annoyed to have come into contact with and is on the verge of a deep sigh
November 6, 2025 at 5:48 AM
barmageddon.bsky.social
photo of a person standing in the middle of an entire room full of trophies and awards, just wall to wall trophies. the man's head has been replaced by an oversized image of rob's head from his pfp. there is also a tiny graphic trophy that has been placed in one of the trophy cases, a replica of the one commented in response to rob's reply.
November 6, 2025 at 2:14 AM
barmageddon.bsky.social
also from the notes archive:
screenshot of notes app. the note just says “using instant oatmeal packets as measuring cups”
November 5, 2025 at 5:58 PM
barmageddon.bsky.social
from the notes archive: that time i took my car in to the shop and they called me the next day
text only image that says: Lady calls me “is this rob” “That’s me” “Do you have an extra key” “An extra key?” “The key stopped working and they wanted to know if you have an extra key” Me: speechless Me: “...the key doesn’t work?” She gets the main guy on the phone to talk to me He says he went out this morning and the car was dead Me: dead? The car was dead? Yeah, have you had problems with the battery No We jumped it and brought it in, couldn’t find the coolant leak, must be a slow leak Me: it was leaving puddles... are you sure we’re talking about the same car? Yeah The Yukon XL? Yeah text only image that says: (Talking) The key stopped working We started it three times using that key I get a ride over from amber Pull in, and a Tahoe is sitting out front Know exactly what happened Guy brings me out to Tahoe “Yeah, we started it a few times, then it wouldnt work, had to disconnect the transmission to pull it out, maybe we can try your other key...” I say i think i know what it is What I point to TAHOE on the door He looks around the lot I point behind him up the hill at my Yukon WELL he doesn’t know what to do Walking back to the garage Him: “I can’t yell at him [other employee], I’m the one that pulled it out!” “I promise you we started this car three times with your key” Me: it’s worth it for the story
November 5, 2025 at 5:52 PM
barmageddon.bsky.social
still image from the movie signs of the two kids and their uncle sitting on a couch with pointy tin foil hats on to prevent the aliens from reading their minds
November 5, 2025 at 6:35 AM
barmageddon.bsky.social
screenshot of my following feed showing two posts that happen to be next to each other. the first is senate gabr saying has anyone checked in with alan dershowitz yet. the second is a post by @pashion.bsky.social reposted by lawn gnome sorceress that is a picture of OJ’s white bronco on a highway
November 5, 2025 at 6:11 AM
barmageddon.bsky.social
this is roughly the line of fire
screenshot of overhead view from google maps of where the plane crashed. a large red line has been drawn through an industrial area. lots of parked cars and trailers can be seen, but there are also businesses.
November 4, 2025 at 11:46 PM
barmageddon.bsky.social
image of rapper 50 cent from the music video for P I M P. text says "i don't know what you heard about me."
November 4, 2025 at 8:53 PM
barmageddon.bsky.social
tinder profile that’s just screenshots of my little sister calling me king
screenshot of text message conversation. i said “i might carry this cough for a while but i think i’ll be alright.” the other person said “anything you need for your stay, king?”
November 4, 2025 at 7:17 PM
barmageddon.bsky.social
two identical images are side by side. the image is from an 18th century painting called the old man and death by joseph wright of derby. an old man perched on a rock by a shoreline is recoiling in fear as a skeleton advances on him. text above the first image says "me normally." text above the second image says "me when i'm sick," and there is a little piece of text next to the man that says *cough*. it's meant to be a commentary on how dramatic i get when i'm sick, as if i'm dying, but also that's how dramatic i am anyway. does this actually come across to the viewer? i don't know, probably not. this is potentially one of the dumber things i've posted on the internet. i can't tell because the horrors of a simple cold have rendered me barely functional. i could expire at any minute. and in these my final moments you want to critique my meme, well fuck you pal.
November 4, 2025 at 12:23 AM
barmageddon.bsky.social
still image of what appears to be batman's head, but it's actually taken from an old college humor (now dropout) video. so it's pete holmes as badman with a D. badman is talking to someone offscreen and the text is supposed to say "I'm basically just rich. And nuts. Rich and nuts." but it has been edited to say "I'm basically just sick. And nuts. Sick and nuts."
November 2, 2025 at 9:58 PM
barmageddon.bsky.social
image of barry harmon's profile picture zoomed all the way in on his big face. he's a middle-aged white man with eyes half-open and lips pressed together in self-satisfaction. he looks like he's overdue for bed but has stayed up to amuse himself by watching a series of videos of people falling down. big text over the entire image says that's not a screen reader than is it
November 2, 2025 at 5:13 AM