artificial intelligence but it’s just me pretending i understand something after you’ve explained it to me for the third time

there's a weird feedback loop where the media's reaction to kirk's death pushes you to speak more ill of the dead than you otherwise would because it's the only reasonable response to the simpering praise they're heaping on him

I wish I could listen to the incredible music I like even when I’m sleeping

I think what establishment democrats need to understand is that most of us hate them all very much for being so persistently useless and shitty in our time of desperation and it fills our hearts with hope and joy when someone who might not be those things beats them.

doctors should come to your house. mfer i do not feel good please don’t make me get up and wait in an uncomfortable chair 😭

Sometimes we're out of dog poop bags and have to make do with Zip-Loc Baggies. When I seal one up I always think yeah, that'll stay fresh.

The only reason anti-vax attitudes were able to take root in the modern era is because vaccines are so fucking good at their job people forgot why we need them