LaurieKBatzel
@authorlaurie.bsky.social
Mom. Wife. Author.
Rep: Stacey Graham at Three Seas Literary.
The good people at Longreads, Chicken Soup for the Soul and McSweeney's think I'm funny.
Harlequin debut coming in '24.
Aspiring Narnian.
I will always tell you if I see a dog.
Rep: Stacey Graham at Three Seas Literary.
The good people at Longreads, Chicken Soup for the Soul and McSweeney's think I'm funny.
Harlequin debut coming in '24.
Aspiring Narnian.
I will always tell you if I see a dog.
Me typing an elevator pitch for an enemies to lovers #romance "and while they fought like cats and dogs at work-"
Midge and Puffin: excuse me but you keep using those words and I don't think they mean what you think they mean 😆
Midge and Puffin: excuse me but you keep using those words and I don't think they mean what you think they mean 😆
March 12, 2025 at 1:07 PM
Me typing an elevator pitch for an enemies to lovers #romance "and while they fought like cats and dogs at work-"
Midge and Puffin: excuse me but you keep using those words and I don't think they mean what you think they mean 😆
Midge and Puffin: excuse me but you keep using those words and I don't think they mean what you think they mean 😆
Some people in our government never read Yertl the Turtle as a child and it shows.
#slavaukraini
#slavaukraini
March 1, 2025 at 4:28 PM
Some people in our government never read Yertl the Turtle as a child and it shows.
#slavaukraini
#slavaukraini
Reposted by LaurieKBatzel
Newsflash to the Mangonian Candidate and his 1st BuDdy: if you yahoos try to give me any $ you "saved" thru your dodgy AF coup, I will give every damn penny to recently fired park rangers and Broadway Bares, the strip show that raises money for AIDS patients sponsored by Broadway Cares/EFA.
February 20, 2025 at 4:31 PM
Newsflash to the Mangonian Candidate and his 1st BuDdy: if you yahoos try to give me any $ you "saved" thru your dodgy AF coup, I will give every damn penny to recently fired park rangers and Broadway Bares, the strip show that raises money for AIDS patients sponsored by Broadway Cares/EFA.
Reposted by LaurieKBatzel
President Trump and his appointees are now solely in charge of the Kennedy Center. Performers protested by dancing.
As Trump takes over leadership at Kennedy Center, some protest through dance
President Trump and his appointees are now solely in charge of the Kennedy Center. Performers protested by dancing.
www.npr.org
February 18, 2025 at 5:23 PM
President Trump and his appointees are now solely in charge of the Kennedy Center. Performers protested by dancing.
Since my new favorite thing is to co-opt my Gen Z/Gen Alpha kids' slang and ruining it for them because I am Very Not Cool, I figured what better way to introduce myself on here than by parodying Longfellow's Midnight Ride of Paul Revere for today's generation :)
Prepare for the cringe.
Prepare for the cringe.
February 18, 2025 at 5:37 PM
Since my new favorite thing is to co-opt my Gen Z/Gen Alpha kids' slang and ruining it for them because I am Very Not Cool, I figured what better way to introduce myself on here than by parodying Longfellow's Midnight Ride of Paul Revere for today's generation :)
Prepare for the cringe.
Prepare for the cringe.
It's the "perfect date" to say my romance novel I pitched to my agent as "Miss Congeniality on a Dairy Farm" is available for pre-orders! Link in comments #april25 #perfectdate #misscongeniality #DairyQueen #romcom #romancebooks #romancereader #secondchanceromance #thedairyqueenssecondchance
April 25, 2024 at 1:13 PM
It's the "perfect date" to say my romance novel I pitched to my agent as "Miss Congeniality on a Dairy Farm" is available for pre-orders! Link in comments #april25 #perfectdate #misscongeniality #DairyQueen #romcom #romancebooks #romancereader #secondchanceromance #thedairyqueenssecondchance
"We’ll call this Phase One. Being seen in public together. We’ve probably planted seeds in the whisper network just being out here with you in your skivvies.”
Lucas pulled his robe up to his neck. “Madam.”
She made a psssht noise. “Oh don’t be bashful, Cheese hermit. #FridayKiss #crystalhillbook2
Lucas pulled his robe up to his neck. “Madam.”
She made a psssht noise. “Oh don’t be bashful, Cheese hermit. #FridayKiss #crystalhillbook2
January 19, 2024 at 2:29 PM
"We’ll call this Phase One. Being seen in public together. We’ve probably planted seeds in the whisper network just being out here with you in your skivvies.”
Lucas pulled his robe up to his neck. “Madam.”
She made a psssht noise. “Oh don’t be bashful, Cheese hermit. #FridayKiss #crystalhillbook2
Lucas pulled his robe up to his neck. “Madam.”
She made a psssht noise. “Oh don’t be bashful, Cheese hermit. #FridayKiss #crystalhillbook2
He tossed her a wink. “I’ve got something up my sleeve for you too.”
“Oh really?” She folded her hands over her belly. A foot kicked back in reply. “Are you going to dazzle the party with some close-up magic? Has the Cheese Hermit become the Great Goudini?”
#FridayKiss #CrystalHillbook2
“Oh really?” She folded her hands over her belly. A foot kicked back in reply. “Are you going to dazzle the party with some close-up magic? Has the Cheese Hermit become the Great Goudini?”
#FridayKiss #CrystalHillbook2
January 12, 2024 at 2:49 PM
He tossed her a wink. “I’ve got something up my sleeve for you too.”
“Oh really?” She folded her hands over her belly. A foot kicked back in reply. “Are you going to dazzle the party with some close-up magic? Has the Cheese Hermit become the Great Goudini?”
#FridayKiss #CrystalHillbook2
“Oh really?” She folded her hands over her belly. A foot kicked back in reply. “Are you going to dazzle the party with some close-up magic? Has the Cheese Hermit become the Great Goudini?”
#FridayKiss #CrystalHillbook2
Not only had the man undergone a romcom worthy makeover, but he had befriended her notoriously human-selective cat? This was unacceptable. How was she supposed to stay mad at him when he was holding kitty Bruce Wayne next to a freshly shorn, ridiculously hot face? #FridayKiss
January 5, 2024 at 2:48 PM
Not only had the man undergone a romcom worthy makeover, but he had befriended her notoriously human-selective cat? This was unacceptable. How was she supposed to stay mad at him when he was holding kitty Bruce Wayne next to a freshly shorn, ridiculously hot face? #FridayKiss
Writing the date on the whiteboard and realizing that it's 2024 and I can officially say my debut #romancenovels with @HarlequinBooks debut this year!!! #romancebooks #series #romcom #dairyqueenssecondchance#dairyfarmer #beautyqueen #secondchanceromance #dreamcometrue
January 3, 2024 at 2:33 PM
Writing the date on the whiteboard and realizing that it's 2024 and I can officially say my debut #romancenovels with @HarlequinBooks debut this year!!! #romancebooks #series #romcom #dairyqueenssecondchance#dairyfarmer #beautyqueen #secondchanceromance #dreamcometrue
Chrysta had always been prone to what her mom called “emotional overpouring.” Any big feeling came spilling out the edge of her like champagne fizzing over the rim of a delicate flute. Happy or angry or smitten, she had never been able to hide or contain it. #FridayKiss #CrystalHillBook2 #harlequin
December 29, 2023 at 4:28 PM
Chrysta had always been prone to what her mom called “emotional overpouring.” Any big feeling came spilling out the edge of her like champagne fizzing over the rim of a delicate flute. Happy or angry or smitten, she had never been able to hide or contain it. #FridayKiss #CrystalHillBook2 #harlequin
Checklist for braving the grocery store one week before #Christmas:
-car keys
-phone
-list from which I will NOT deviate no matter how the mint M&M's beckon
-gloves
-reminder to control your glass face because other people can see your fatigue/annoyance/fleeting murderous impulses
-car keys
-phone
-list from which I will NOT deviate no matter how the mint M&M's beckon
-gloves
-reminder to control your glass face because other people can see your fatigue/annoyance/fleeting murderous impulses
December 19, 2023 at 3:29 PM
Checklist for braving the grocery store one week before #Christmas:
-car keys
-phone
-list from which I will NOT deviate no matter how the mint M&M's beckon
-gloves
-reminder to control your glass face because other people can see your fatigue/annoyance/fleeting murderous impulses
-car keys
-phone
-list from which I will NOT deviate no matter how the mint M&M's beckon
-gloves
-reminder to control your glass face because other people can see your fatigue/annoyance/fleeting murderous impulses
Inside was a block of semi-soft cheese. It was studded with dried red peppers and rosemary spelling out the words “I’m sorry.”
A small gasp escaped Chrysta’s lips. A man apologizing for something that wasn’t even his fault was rare enough. A man who said it with cheese?
#FridayKiss #crystalhillbook2
A small gasp escaped Chrysta’s lips. A man apologizing for something that wasn’t even his fault was rare enough. A man who said it with cheese?
#FridayKiss #crystalhillbook2
December 15, 2023 at 2:54 PM
Inside was a block of semi-soft cheese. It was studded with dried red peppers and rosemary spelling out the words “I’m sorry.”
A small gasp escaped Chrysta’s lips. A man apologizing for something that wasn’t even his fault was rare enough. A man who said it with cheese?
#FridayKiss #crystalhillbook2
A small gasp escaped Chrysta’s lips. A man apologizing for something that wasn’t even his fault was rare enough. A man who said it with cheese?
#FridayKiss #crystalhillbook2
Lucas wondered if her high ponytail was intended to give the illusion of height. He wasn’t in any position to criticize as this morning Law had pulled up a pic of one of those Scottish cows with the long hair and held it up next to Lucas for a less than flattering side-by-side comparison #FridayKiss
December 1, 2023 at 3:15 PM
Lucas wondered if her high ponytail was intended to give the illusion of height. He wasn’t in any position to criticize as this morning Law had pulled up a pic of one of those Scottish cows with the long hair and held it up next to Lucas for a less than flattering side-by-side comparison #FridayKiss
We're going to see Disney's new movie, Wish on Friday, but I can already tell you my mom parody version of the song "This is the thanks I get" will be completed by Saturday morning 😆
November 22, 2023 at 3:11 PM
We're going to see Disney's new movie, Wish on Friday, but I can already tell you my mom parody version of the song "This is the thanks I get" will be completed by Saturday morning 😆
Lucas wasn't a lip reader but even he could tell her expression meant Abandon Hope, Ye Who Enter.
"I’m going to my room. I’d rather take my chances with the haunted Anne Boleyn doll than stay here with some scruffy cheese troll mansplaining my own business to me.” #FridayKiss #crystalhillbook2
"I’m going to my room. I’d rather take my chances with the haunted Anne Boleyn doll than stay here with some scruffy cheese troll mansplaining my own business to me.” #FridayKiss #crystalhillbook2
November 17, 2023 at 3:38 PM
Lucas wasn't a lip reader but even he could tell her expression meant Abandon Hope, Ye Who Enter.
"I’m going to my room. I’d rather take my chances with the haunted Anne Boleyn doll than stay here with some scruffy cheese troll mansplaining my own business to me.” #FridayKiss #crystalhillbook2
"I’m going to my room. I’d rather take my chances with the haunted Anne Boleyn doll than stay here with some scruffy cheese troll mansplaining my own business to me.” #FridayKiss #crystalhillbook2
By trial & error, they discovered Grana Padano worked best for Jenga blocks. Chrysta’s mouth watered every time it was her turn & the earthy smell of the cheese reached her extra sensitive nose. But she wouldn't give in, no matter how badly she craved it.
#FridayKiss #Crystalhillbook2 #HarlequinHW
#FridayKiss #Crystalhillbook2 #HarlequinHW
November 3, 2023 at 2:43 PM
By trial & error, they discovered Grana Padano worked best for Jenga blocks. Chrysta’s mouth watered every time it was her turn & the earthy smell of the cheese reached her extra sensitive nose. But she wouldn't give in, no matter how badly she craved it.
#FridayKiss #Crystalhillbook2 #HarlequinHW
#FridayKiss #Crystalhillbook2 #HarlequinHW
No wonder she had hesitated at his fake engagement offer. Nobody was going to trust a hermit who lived in a cheese cave with a baby.
“That’s good to hear,” she replied. “Pregnancy is hard enough as it is. I love this little peanut so much already it’s almost scary."
#FridayKiss #CrystalHillbook2
“That’s good to hear,” she replied. “Pregnancy is hard enough as it is. I love this little peanut so much already it’s almost scary."
#FridayKiss #CrystalHillbook2
October 27, 2023 at 1:34 PM
No wonder she had hesitated at his fake engagement offer. Nobody was going to trust a hermit who lived in a cheese cave with a baby.
“That’s good to hear,” she replied. “Pregnancy is hard enough as it is. I love this little peanut so much already it’s almost scary."
#FridayKiss #CrystalHillbook2
“That’s good to hear,” she replied. “Pregnancy is hard enough as it is. I love this little peanut so much already it’s almost scary."
#FridayKiss #CrystalHillbook2
Just in case any of her people are listening, MBB was 100% the inspiration for the main character of my upcoming second chance romance with #harlequin coming this summer and if she's looking for new projects and finds "Miss Congeniality on a Dairy Farm" at all appealing...
Hi 😜
Hi 😜
Millie Bobby Brown na capa da Glamour UK, Women of the Year
October 19, 2023 at 2:05 PM
Just in case any of her people are listening, MBB was 100% the inspiration for the main character of my upcoming second chance romance with #harlequin coming this summer and if she's looking for new projects and finds "Miss Congeniality on a Dairy Farm" at all appealing...
Hi 😜
Hi 😜
We have a title!!!
And it's not terrible!!!
In fact, it's great and I love it :)
#amwritingromance #romcom #harlequin
And it's not terrible!!!
In fact, it's great and I love it :)
#amwritingromance #romcom #harlequin
Emailed a list of titles for Crystal Hill Book #1 to my editor with the subject line "Hope one of these isn't terrible?"
A few may or may not be references to ABBA songs.
And by a few I mean most.
And by may or may not be, I mean definitely are.
#romancebooks #romcom #books #titles #ugh
A few may or may not be references to ABBA songs.
And by a few I mean most.
And by may or may not be, I mean definitely are.
#romancebooks #romcom #books #titles #ugh
August 24, 2023 at 1:45 PM
We have a title!!!
And it's not terrible!!!
In fact, it's great and I love it :)
#amwritingromance #romcom #harlequin
And it's not terrible!!!
In fact, it's great and I love it :)
#amwritingromance #romcom #harlequin
Emailed a list of titles for Crystal Hill Book #1 to my editor with the subject line "Hope one of these isn't terrible?"
A few may or may not be references to ABBA songs.
And by a few I mean most.
And by may or may not be, I mean definitely are.
#romancebooks #romcom #books #titles #ugh
A few may or may not be references to ABBA songs.
And by a few I mean most.
And by may or may not be, I mean definitely are.
#romancebooks #romcom #books #titles #ugh
August 21, 2023 at 4:10 PM
Emailed a list of titles for Crystal Hill Book #1 to my editor with the subject line "Hope one of these isn't terrible?"
A few may or may not be references to ABBA songs.
And by a few I mean most.
And by may or may not be, I mean definitely are.
#romancebooks #romcom #books #titles #ugh
A few may or may not be references to ABBA songs.
And by a few I mean most.
And by may or may not be, I mean definitely are.
#romancebooks #romcom #books #titles #ugh
Reposting for #nationalbookloversday
Hi there! I'm an author of romance novels, baker of cookies and lackey to a corgi named Stuart. I just signed a 2-book deal with Harlequin Books with book number 1 pitched as "Miss Congeniality on a Dairy Farm." I'll keep you posted as we go!
August 9, 2023 at 6:44 PM
Reposting for #nationalbookloversday
Hey #romancelandia #authors tell me 5 fun things about your MC.
BeeBee from Crystal Hill Book #1 is:
👨🌾 a dairy farmer
👖 lives in her jeans
😛 has a habit of putting her foot in her mouth
👸will do anything for her water buffaloes-even enter a beauty pageant
🍕fav pizza topping is pineapple & peppers
BeeBee from Crystal Hill Book #1 is:
👨🌾 a dairy farmer
👖 lives in her jeans
😛 has a habit of putting her foot in her mouth
👸will do anything for her water buffaloes-even enter a beauty pageant
🍕fav pizza topping is pineapple & peppers
Hey #romancelandia #authors tell me 5 fun things about your MC.
Bas from Holding Out for a Gyro is:
🇬🇷 Greek American
🍝 a Chef
🙄 a dad joke goofball
💗 open hearted
🧲 very woo (in a Clifton Strengths way, not a mystical way. More "Please like me!")
Bas from Holding Out for a Gyro is:
🇬🇷 Greek American
🍝 a Chef
🙄 a dad joke goofball
💗 open hearted
🧲 very woo (in a Clifton Strengths way, not a mystical way. More "Please like me!")
Hey #romancelandia #authors tell me 5 fun things about your MC
Sean from Fake Flame is:
🚒 a firefighter
📚 a bookworm
💪🏼 built like a tank
🇮🇪 described by Eva as a "walking bar of Irish Spring"
🦮 a human golden retriever
Sean from Fake Flame is:
🚒 a firefighter
📚 a bookworm
💪🏼 built like a tank
🇮🇪 described by Eva as a "walking bar of Irish Spring"
🦮 a human golden retriever
August 4, 2023 at 2:17 PM
Hey #romancelandia #authors tell me 5 fun things about your MC.
BeeBee from Crystal Hill Book #1 is:
👨🌾 a dairy farmer
👖 lives in her jeans
😛 has a habit of putting her foot in her mouth
👸will do anything for her water buffaloes-even enter a beauty pageant
🍕fav pizza topping is pineapple & peppers
BeeBee from Crystal Hill Book #1 is:
👨🌾 a dairy farmer
👖 lives in her jeans
😛 has a habit of putting her foot in her mouth
👸will do anything for her water buffaloes-even enter a beauty pageant
🍕fav pizza topping is pineapple & peppers