Author Evan Witmer
@author-evan-witmer.bsky.social
Author of Pages from the Pizza Crows, Digest: 10 Short Stories by Convicted & Plausible People-Eaters, and How To Burn This Book. Soon the be author of Tall People—a novel about the social lives of anthropomorphic kaiju.
https://linktr.ee/Authorevanwitmer
https://linktr.ee/Authorevanwitmer
Check out my #booktrailer for the 2025 Genevieve Crumbley Central Canadian Sharpshooting & Short Story Competition
#bookish
#bookish
May 22, 2025 at 8:51 PM
Check out my #booktrailer for the 2025 Genevieve Crumbley Central Canadian Sharpshooting & Short Story Competition
#bookish
#bookish
May 1, 2025 at 4:01 PM
Got a cease and desist from #wutangclan Kind of surprised. Thought it’d come from #sega
April 23, 2025 at 6:19 PM
Got a cease and desist from #wutangclan Kind of surprised. Thought it’d come from #sega
Cool authors don’t follow the rules. “Not for resale.” Yeah? Who’s gonna stop me? #bookish #authors #writingtips #selfpublishingjourney #kdpamazon
April 22, 2025 at 2:37 PM
Cool authors don’t follow the rules. “Not for resale.” Yeah? Who’s gonna stop me? #bookish #authors #writingtips #selfpublishingjourney #kdpamazon
April 19, 2025 at 5:41 PM
Convincing you to read my book based on the first word. #bookish #booktrend
April 16, 2025 at 10:21 PM
Convincing you to read my book based on the first word. #bookish #booktrend
Looking for new beta readers for a story about left-handed people in a world that doesn’t like them. #arc #betareader #bookish #lefthanded
April 8, 2025 at 2:24 PM
Looking for new beta readers for a story about left-handed people in a world that doesn’t like them. #arc #betareader #bookish #lefthanded
Hired a model to pose with my book. Asked if she’d wear a funny hat and she didn’t disappoint. #bookish #books #bookphotography #model
Tall People is my new novel about anthropomorphic kaiju Millennials trying to find love, friendship, and tolerable careers in NYC.
Tall People is my new novel about anthropomorphic kaiju Millennials trying to find love, friendship, and tolerable careers in NYC.
April 3, 2025 at 10:32 PM
Hired a model to pose with my book. Asked if she’d wear a funny hat and she didn’t disappoint. #bookish #books #bookphotography #model
Tall People is my new novel about anthropomorphic kaiju Millennials trying to find love, friendship, and tolerable careers in NYC.
Tall People is my new novel about anthropomorphic kaiju Millennials trying to find love, friendship, and tolerable careers in NYC.
Got my new flag hung up next to its brother. Can’t we’ll all just:
COEXIST
✝️🥤🍍
#coexist #flag #peace #pepsi #christians #love #vexillology
COEXIST
✝️🥤🍍
#coexist #flag #peace #pepsi #christians #love #vexillology
March 29, 2025 at 4:54 PM
Got my new flag hung up next to its brother. Can’t we’ll all just:
COEXIST
✝️🥤🍍
#coexist #flag #peace #pepsi #christians #love #vexillology
COEXIST
✝️🥤🍍
#coexist #flag #peace #pepsi #christians #love #vexillology
Made a cool #shortstory about a #dragqueen whose drag persona is split from their pedestrian personality after drinking a magic drink… trouble ensues. Check it out in Afterpast Review: @theafterpastreview
#published #authorlife #bookish
#published #authorlife #bookish
March 23, 2025 at 3:54 PM
Made a cool #shortstory about a #dragqueen whose drag persona is split from their pedestrian personality after drinking a magic drink… trouble ensues. Check it out in Afterpast Review: @theafterpastreview
#published #authorlife #bookish
#published #authorlife #bookish
Transformed a lot over the past year Went from having those shaved sides to a looooong mop. Not sure why I went down this path. I was getting sick of people mistaking me for an undercover cop. Now they think I’m homeless and all is right in the world. #haircut #longhair #hairstyles #authors #bookish
March 20, 2025 at 3:19 PM
Transformed a lot over the past year Went from having those shaved sides to a looooong mop. Not sure why I went down this path. I was getting sick of people mistaking me for an undercover cop. Now they think I’m homeless and all is right in the world. #haircut #longhair #hairstyles #authors #bookish
March 20, 2025 at 12:36 AM
It's #monstermarchmadness and
#Bookish is looking for #monsterromance with an interesting twist. Ditch the #vampires and
#werewolves And fall in love with a #kaiju instead.
#marchmonstermadness #march #monstermadness
#Bookish is looking for #monsterromance with an interesting twist. Ditch the #vampires and
#werewolves And fall in love with a #kaiju instead.
#marchmonstermadness #march #monstermadness
March 12, 2025 at 12:25 PM
It's #monstermarchmadness and
#Bookish is looking for #monsterromance with an interesting twist. Ditch the #vampires and
#werewolves And fall in love with a #kaiju instead.
#marchmonstermadness #march #monstermadness
#Bookish is looking for #monsterromance with an interesting twist. Ditch the #vampires and
#werewolves And fall in love with a #kaiju instead.
#marchmonstermadness #march #monstermadness
You’ve got to have a few screws loose to be giving away your book like this. Tall People is all about Millenial kaiju trying to find love and friendship in the city. #booktok #bookish #kaiju #drama #indiebookstore #monsterverse #monsterromance #freebook
March 11, 2025 at 5:59 PM
You’ve got to have a few screws loose to be giving away your book like this. Tall People is all about Millenial kaiju trying to find love and friendship in the city. #booktok #bookish #kaiju #drama #indiebookstore #monsterverse #monsterromance #freebook
Hey guys I'm looking for a #betareader for a new #shortstory I wrote about a #dj who finds a magic #cherubim head and incorporates the noise it makes into his #setlist. #readersoftiktok #editorsoftiktok #music #magic #fantasy
March 10, 2025 at 3:45 PM
Hey guys I'm looking for a #betareader for a new #shortstory I wrote about a #dj who finds a magic #cherubim head and incorporates the noise it makes into his #setlist. #readersoftiktok #editorsoftiktok #music #magic #fantasy
Choosing a random #cryptid from my #metazoo cards and doing a little report on them. Today’s superbeasto—the #rumptifusel . #mythicalcreature #americanfolklore #talltale #bigfoot #legends
March 9, 2025 at 6:08 PM
Choosing a random #cryptid from my #metazoo cards and doing a little report on them. Today’s superbeasto—the #rumptifusel . #mythicalcreature #americanfolklore #talltale #bigfoot #legends
March 9, 2025 at 3:23 PM
It’s not unalived… it’s kill murder die.
Sensei Sludge — Disco Pickle
#rap #funnysong #beats #lyrics #hiphop
Sensei Sludge — Disco Pickle
#rap #funnysong #beats #lyrics #hiphop
March 6, 2025 at 4:36 PM
It’s not unalived… it’s kill murder die.
Sensei Sludge — Disco Pickle
#rap #funnysong #beats #lyrics #hiphop
Sensei Sludge — Disco Pickle
#rap #funnysong #beats #lyrics #hiphop
Predicting the #rottentomatoes score for future #biopic movies before the #celebrity is actually 💀.
#kanye #britneyspears #quentintarantino #chrischan #benshapiro #movies #predictions
#kanye #britneyspears #quentintarantino #chrischan #benshapiro #movies #predictions
March 5, 2025 at 6:13 PM
Predicting the #rottentomatoes score for future #biopic movies before the #celebrity is actually 💀.
#kanye #britneyspears #quentintarantino #chrischan #benshapiro #movies #predictions
#kanye #britneyspears #quentintarantino #chrischan #benshapiro #movies #predictions