Could have been riding on a GSA contract vehicle for cost savings.

I feel like real person fanfic is off limits until the person is very dead

What in the prairie Midsommar?!

I appreciate that you think I’ve even got my tree up yet.

Why would someone not just play a single-player RPG in that case? I’m not an MMO player, myself, so maybe there’s an appeal I don’t get, but it seems like re-inventing the wheel.

That describes me and I’m fully a millennial. I don’t even remember the Reagan administration.

We use a penny! The test is if it covers Lincoln’s beard. Although I guess since they stopped minting them we have to figure something else out.

I would have agreed before last week, but I visited my aunt and her (non-smart) toilet has a heated seat and I think *that* might be the zenith.

The enchanted crabs are sold out everywhere else, though.

Yeah. You do need to budget in more recovery time than you expect for days like that. It sucks.

They’re very gullible.

I got an email recently that began with "Warfighting Partners" and I still haven't recovered.

They didn't say it was going to be the best waking.

My back started hurting and I broke out in a rash just listening to this.

It’s the secondhand embarrassment of seeing someone get off on a man who doesn’t believe in germs sext like a bottom-barrel Wattpad fanfic.

I’m not sure that it is, actually.

I haven’t seen the poem everyone is talking about yet, and I am deeply afraid this is a reference to it.

I had a similar situation with a cousin who faked terminal kidney disease right up until my mom was going to give her a kidney. I understand on one level the factors that led her to spiral, but, like, I would have given her financial help without the lies? Destroyed the relationship for nothing.