Albert
@albertcumus.bsky.social
About: British purveyor of NSFW artistic lewds and random musings
Stats: 6ft, 40, he/him
Likes: hot people with hot voices
Dislikes: racism and injustice, so don't be doing that
About you: mdni
Additional: the 't' is silent
Stats: 6ft, 40, he/him
Likes: hot people with hot voices
Dislikes: racism and injustice, so don't be doing that
About you: mdni
Additional: the 't' is silent
Morning bluesky! Got an order for slutty mono forearms. Anyone?
November 24, 2025 at 10:51 AM
Morning bluesky! Got an order for slutty mono forearms. Anyone?
Good morning sleepyheads it's shower time
November 23, 2025 at 10:30 AM
Good morning sleepyheads it's shower time
I missed Thursday this week
November 22, 2025 at 8:08 PM
I missed Thursday this week
C'mere! I've just made this happen
November 21, 2025 at 4:08 PM
C'mere! I've just made this happen
Tuesday things, such as they are
November 18, 2025 at 7:32 PM
Tuesday things, such as they are
Ok fine I'll get up but I'm only wearing mono
November 17, 2025 at 2:21 PM
Ok fine I'll get up but I'm only wearing mono
Why aren't you sitting on my face right now I mean good morning. Have some mono.
November 17, 2025 at 8:15 AM
Why aren't you sitting on my face right now I mean good morning. Have some mono.
Sunday is a verb. Would anyone like to come and play sunday?
November 16, 2025 at 10:39 AM
Sunday is a verb. Would anyone like to come and play sunday?
He says he's a feminist but shaves his underarms
November 15, 2025 at 9:39 AM
He says he's a feminist but shaves his underarms
Realised today I haven't eaten since Monday so am making an absolute BEAST of a curry. Anyone want any?
November 13, 2025 at 5:35 PM
Realised today I haven't eaten since Monday so am making an absolute BEAST of a curry. Anyone want any?
We doing thighs or no?
November 13, 2025 at 10:24 AM
We doing thighs or no?
Right this has gone mad but I WILL make you a lovely breakfast.
November 12, 2025 at 10:54 PM
Right this has gone mad but I WILL make you a lovely breakfast.
See me after class, Miss Virgo
November 12, 2025 at 8:32 PM
See me after class, Miss Virgo
*David Attenborough voice*
Ass in the northern hemisphere usually hibernates in the winter months but despite the incessant half-light there are still occasional sightings like this one which, today, chooses to wagon...
Ass in the northern hemisphere usually hibernates in the winter months but despite the incessant half-light there are still occasional sightings like this one which, today, chooses to wagon...
November 12, 2025 at 8:05 AM
*David Attenborough voice*
Ass in the northern hemisphere usually hibernates in the winter months but despite the incessant half-light there are still occasional sightings like this one which, today, chooses to wagon...
Ass in the northern hemisphere usually hibernates in the winter months but despite the incessant half-light there are still occasional sightings like this one which, today, chooses to wagon...
Driving round in a big van today and doing that open-palmed streery thing. It's fucking sick, mate.
Might shout "oi oi!" at someone in a bit.
Might shout "oi oi!" at someone in a bit.
November 11, 2025 at 2:32 PM
Driving round in a big van today and doing that open-palmed streery thing. It's fucking sick, mate.
Might shout "oi oi!" at someone in a bit.
Might shout "oi oi!" at someone in a bit.
Well you *may* have been (ie you definitely were) my muse for this last week
November 11, 2025 at 7:50 AM
Well you *may* have been (ie you definitely were) my muse for this last week
How does the universe keep reading my mind?
November 10, 2025 at 6:21 PM
How does the universe keep reading my mind?
Some mono for your monday. I am very pro-choice.
November 10, 2025 at 8:47 AM
Some mono for your monday. I am very pro-choice.
Let's eat humble thigh
November 6, 2025 at 12:12 PM
Let's eat humble thigh
Got a funny little thing on my thumb. It loves you as much as I do 🩷
November 5, 2025 at 10:53 PM
Got a funny little thing on my thumb. It loves you as much as I do 🩷
It's come to my attention that everyone I know is really hot. I love you and thank you
November 3, 2025 at 11:17 PM
It's come to my attention that everyone I know is really hot. I love you and thank you