Waldo
@waldo2006.bsky.social
Satirical input on social and political happenings. Cook, gardner, brewer, IT, disc golfer and a dad so the jokes are constant. Go BILLS!
Had someone's supervisor call saying my team wouldn't help his staff reset his password.
"We did the reset, but he is required to change it immediately and their new password wasnt compliant"
"What?"
"They wanted their password to be %company name%"
"You can't do that?"
"No?"
Ffs
"We did the reset, but he is required to change it immediately and their new password wasnt compliant"
"What?"
"They wanted their password to be %company name%"
"You can't do that?"
"No?"
Ffs
January 28, 2026 at 11:41 PM
Had someone's supervisor call saying my team wouldn't help his staff reset his password.
"We did the reset, but he is required to change it immediately and their new password wasnt compliant"
"What?"
"They wanted their password to be %company name%"
"You can't do that?"
"No?"
Ffs
"We did the reset, but he is required to change it immediately and their new password wasnt compliant"
"What?"
"They wanted their password to be %company name%"
"You can't do that?"
"No?"
Ffs
"you can't blame Trump! Lots of DHS and Border Patrol agents were hired under Biden!"
Me: "ok, so then we should get rid of all of them"
"Wait wait wait, I'm not saying that."
Me: "what are you saying?"
"Whatever makes sure no actual change happens, and we can continue terrorizing America"
Me: "ok, so then we should get rid of all of them"
"Wait wait wait, I'm not saying that."
Me: "what are you saying?"
"Whatever makes sure no actual change happens, and we can continue terrorizing America"
January 28, 2026 at 10:40 PM
"you can't blame Trump! Lots of DHS and Border Patrol agents were hired under Biden!"
Me: "ok, so then we should get rid of all of them"
"Wait wait wait, I'm not saying that."
Me: "what are you saying?"
"Whatever makes sure no actual change happens, and we can continue terrorizing America"
Me: "ok, so then we should get rid of all of them"
"Wait wait wait, I'm not saying that."
Me: "what are you saying?"
"Whatever makes sure no actual change happens, and we can continue terrorizing America"
DHS when responding to requests to follow the law and arrest the ICE gestapo responsible for murdering Alex Pretti:
January 28, 2026 at 8:36 PM
DHS when responding to requests to follow the law and arrest the ICE gestapo responsible for murdering Alex Pretti:
They started with the same sealutes.
Waving flags, wearing arm bands and patches with the same symbols.
Then they started using the same lines.
"Poisoning the blood of our country"
"Enemy from within"
"Vermin"
And now
"I was just following orders"
Waving flags, wearing arm bands and patches with the same symbols.
Then they started using the same lines.
"Poisoning the blood of our country"
"Enemy from within"
"Vermin"
And now
"I was just following orders"
January 28, 2026 at 1:50 PM
They started with the same sealutes.
Waving flags, wearing arm bands and patches with the same symbols.
Then they started using the same lines.
"Poisoning the blood of our country"
"Enemy from within"
"Vermin"
And now
"I was just following orders"
Waving flags, wearing arm bands and patches with the same symbols.
Then they started using the same lines.
"Poisoning the blood of our country"
"Enemy from within"
"Vermin"
And now
"I was just following orders"
Bringing back a classic because it's again relevant.
January 28, 2026 at 12:08 PM
Bringing back a classic because it's again relevant.
I bet the execs at Ziploc were excited AF when every food product moved to "resealable" packaging.
January 28, 2026 at 3:36 AM
I bet the execs at Ziploc were excited AF when every food product moved to "resealable" packaging.
There isn't an explanation. Hold them in contempt.
This is like when a serial spousal abuser violates no contact orders and instead of arresting then or taking their guns, they wait until the spouse is murdered and go "wow, how could we have prevented that?"
This is like when a serial spousal abuser violates no contact orders and instead of arresting then or taking their guns, they wait until the spouse is murdered and go "wow, how could we have prevented that?"
January 27, 2026 at 4:22 PM
There isn't an explanation. Hold them in contempt.
This is like when a serial spousal abuser violates no contact orders and instead of arresting then or taking their guns, they wait until the spouse is murdered and go "wow, how could we have prevented that?"
This is like when a serial spousal abuser violates no contact orders and instead of arresting then or taking their guns, they wait until the spouse is murdered and go "wow, how could we have prevented that?"
We have barely taken back an inch of the miles Republicans have gained, and I can already tell a bunch of centrist "Dems" are going to think we've won and can go back to the new status quo.
We haven't won yet.
Not by a lot.
We haven't won yet.
Not by a lot.
January 27, 2026 at 12:12 PM
We have barely taken back an inch of the miles Republicans have gained, and I can already tell a bunch of centrist "Dems" are going to think we've won and can go back to the new status quo.
We haven't won yet.
Not by a lot.
We haven't won yet.
Not by a lot.
Bovino thinks he's 1 step closer to retirement, but he's really 1 step closer to life in prison.
January 27, 2026 at 1:19 AM
Bovino thinks he's 1 step closer to retirement, but he's really 1 step closer to life in prison.
There is no such thing as a compassionate republican because they are mutually exclusive.
January 26, 2026 at 9:51 PM
There is no such thing as a compassionate republican because they are mutually exclusive.
Unfortunate autocorrect I received today via email.
"Hi, we need the kid sex tender looked at. We aren't getting service in the back room"
Kids extender (what they call a wireless repeater for the kids network)
"Hi, we need the kid sex tender looked at. We aren't getting service in the back room"
Kids extender (what they call a wireless repeater for the kids network)
January 26, 2026 at 7:14 PM
Unfortunate autocorrect I received today via email.
"Hi, we need the kid sex tender looked at. We aren't getting service in the back room"
Kids extender (what they call a wireless repeater for the kids network)
"Hi, we need the kid sex tender looked at. We aren't getting service in the back room"
Kids extender (what they call a wireless repeater for the kids network)
Waiting in line to get a sub and folks in front of me complaining they might get the slow new guy.
They let out a sigh of relief when they got called to the fast guy.
I got the slow guy.
Which is fine, because he doesn't know how many chicken fingers per sub and gave me double.
Cost me 1 minute.
They let out a sigh of relief when they got called to the fast guy.
I got the slow guy.
Which is fine, because he doesn't know how many chicken fingers per sub and gave me double.
Cost me 1 minute.
January 26, 2026 at 6:46 PM
Waiting in line to get a sub and folks in front of me complaining they might get the slow new guy.
They let out a sigh of relief when they got called to the fast guy.
I got the slow guy.
Which is fine, because he doesn't know how many chicken fingers per sub and gave me double.
Cost me 1 minute.
They let out a sigh of relief when they got called to the fast guy.
I got the slow guy.
Which is fine, because he doesn't know how many chicken fingers per sub and gave me double.
Cost me 1 minute.
Republicans: "guns don't kill people, people kill people!"
Also Republicans: "well actually....."
Also Republicans: "well actually....."
January 26, 2026 at 4:44 PM
Republicans: "guns don't kill people, people kill people!"
Also Republicans: "well actually....."
Also Republicans: "well actually....."
Getting a lot of calls from people who ignored all of the "If you ever plan to work remotely you MUST setup your Multi-Factor-Authentication" emails. They are pissed they can't work remotely because, well....
"No one warned me"
Sir I can see you read 2 of the 5 emails before deleting them.
"No one warned me"
Sir I can see you read 2 of the 5 emails before deleting them.
January 26, 2026 at 1:49 PM
Getting a lot of calls from people who ignored all of the "If you ever plan to work remotely you MUST setup your Multi-Factor-Authentication" emails. They are pissed they can't work remotely because, well....
"No one warned me"
Sir I can see you read 2 of the 5 emails before deleting them.
"No one warned me"
Sir I can see you read 2 of the 5 emails before deleting them.
"how many of them do we have to murder before they stop asking about the Epstein files?!" - Republicans
January 25, 2026 at 10:25 PM
"how many of them do we have to murder before they stop asking about the Epstein files?!" - Republicans
Cannular
By Rob Zombie
From the brewing lore
fresh new cans I pour
no longer done in glass
such a pain in the ass
they have a farther reach
playground camp or beach
easier to rack
carry with backpack
Poured from a keezer I made from my freezer
I seal all the drinks with my Cannular
#homebrewing
By Rob Zombie
From the brewing lore
fresh new cans I pour
no longer done in glass
such a pain in the ass
they have a farther reach
playground camp or beach
easier to rack
carry with backpack
Poured from a keezer I made from my freezer
I seal all the drinks with my Cannular
#homebrewing
January 25, 2026 at 5:14 PM
Cannular
By Rob Zombie
From the brewing lore
fresh new cans I pour
no longer done in glass
such a pain in the ass
they have a farther reach
playground camp or beach
easier to rack
carry with backpack
Poured from a keezer I made from my freezer
I seal all the drinks with my Cannular
#homebrewing
By Rob Zombie
From the brewing lore
fresh new cans I pour
no longer done in glass
such a pain in the ass
they have a farther reach
playground camp or beach
easier to rack
carry with backpack
Poured from a keezer I made from my freezer
I seal all the drinks with my Cannular
#homebrewing
"Shoot first, don't allow anyone to ask questions later" - page 3 of the ICE training guide
January 25, 2026 at 3:12 PM
"Shoot first, don't allow anyone to ask questions later" - page 3 of the ICE training guide
Whelp, I guess some of the Democrats only will do what's right after 2 citizens get murdered by Trump's gestapo....
1 wasn't enough.
And Friday at 11pm I'm sure Chuck will roll over again.
1 wasn't enough.
And Friday at 11pm I'm sure Chuck will roll over again.
January 25, 2026 at 2:02 PM
Whelp, I guess some of the Democrats only will do what's right after 2 citizens get murdered by Trump's gestapo....
1 wasn't enough.
And Friday at 11pm I'm sure Chuck will roll over again.
1 wasn't enough.
And Friday at 11pm I'm sure Chuck will roll over again.
Republicans hate veterans so much, they'll murder the medical staff that treat them.
Fuck ICE.
Fuck ICE.
January 25, 2026 at 1:46 AM
Republicans hate veterans so much, they'll murder the medical staff that treat them.
Fuck ICE.
Fuck ICE.
As January ends, remember to return the canning jars, homebrew bottles and tins your friend and families gifted you food in. One of the biggest costs for home made foods are the containers.
If you don't return mine, you get a smaller one next year.
If you don't return mine, you get a smaller one next year.
January 24, 2026 at 7:36 PM
As January ends, remember to return the canning jars, homebrew bottles and tins your friend and families gifted you food in. One of the biggest costs for home made foods are the containers.
If you don't return mine, you get a smaller one next year.
If you don't return mine, you get a smaller one next year.
Fuck ICE.
Murderers don't belong on our streets.
Fuck every politician, Republicans or Dems, who voted to give them more funding.
Murderers don't belong on our streets.
Fuck every politician, Republicans or Dems, who voted to give them more funding.
January 24, 2026 at 6:03 PM
Fuck ICE.
Murderers don't belong on our streets.
Fuck every politician, Republicans or Dems, who voted to give them more funding.
Murderers don't belong on our streets.
Fuck every politician, Republicans or Dems, who voted to give them more funding.
It was -2 when we started, but still a fun round. Cold can't keep disc golf from happening.
January 24, 2026 at 5:06 PM
It was -2 when we started, but still a fun round. Cold can't keep disc golf from happening.
Season 1 episode 7 of X Files told us how much AI would ruin the world.
January 24, 2026 at 2:28 AM
Season 1 episode 7 of X Files told us how much AI would ruin the world.
Trump's blood is thinner than his attention span.
January 24, 2026 at 1:44 AM
Trump's blood is thinner than his attention span.
Would it piss off a Brit to call them a fanny pack?
(Listening to the bands song "The Weight" and went down a rabbit hole)
(Listening to the bands song "The Weight" and went down a rabbit hole)
January 24, 2026 at 1:31 AM
Would it piss off a Brit to call them a fanny pack?
(Listening to the bands song "The Weight" and went down a rabbit hole)
(Listening to the bands song "The Weight" and went down a rabbit hole)