I thought we all agreed we were going to be cool to Monica Lewinsky forever because of what she was put through, but the second there's a political cheap shot we're wrapping her abuse into the Trump/Clinton jokes?

That man is wearing a dress! Free country, we can all wear dresses, mind your business, next question.

That gives them an unfair biological advantage! No it doesn't, and sports are built on biological advantage anyway, next question.

What if they regret it? Life is full of regrets, next question.

Every year, telling Amanda about daylight savings time is always about the equivalent of informing them of a beloved celebrity death. Hand on their leg, deep pity in my eyes. "Amanda, I'm so sorry. But..."

My middle son was trying to come up with a Shakespearean-style insult and I think he landed on a real winner with, "You uncooked muffin!"

A list of 'Most Unpleasant Yet Trivial Surprises' is not complete without New Toothpaste Flavor.

My daughter (12), frustrated by her friends playing incorrectly, wrote instructions and motivations for how all their pretend characters would play together and took them to school yesterday to hand out. She printed out six copies.

Cis folks, this bathroom shit is an example of the kind of stuff I'm worried about with the new administration. This is a step on the road to codifying the exclusion of trans people from public life. And it happened immediately!

Folding laundry and sorting Amanda's into "gay shirts" "nerd shirts" and "gay nerd shirts"

This, paraphrased, is the message I'm leading with as my kids wake up and ask what happened. They're scared. I'm scared. But no one is alone.

youtu.be/lDXcGZHBiGo?...

The kids are all just old enough to be paying attention and anxious this year, and they all asked to be distracted tonight. So we're off to swim at the Y after school, which is not a bad election day/eve plan if you want to force yourself away from a screen.