Tedward
@slampottery.bsky.social
Hey kiddo. I know I’ve been gone a long time, and I know your angry at me, but dads really gonna stick around this time, right after he goes to the store for a couple things.
Somehow, we all make doo
November 5, 2023 at 5:21 PM
Somehow, we all make doo
My baby keeps trying to steal my black and milds which on its own would be annoying, but he’s already had a five pack of wine wood tips today. He’s so fucking selfish.
November 2, 2023 at 11:50 PM
My baby keeps trying to steal my black and milds which on its own would be annoying, but he’s already had a five pack of wine wood tips today. He’s so fucking selfish.
R.E.M has successfully conditioned me to shout “Leonard Bernstein” and I guess I just feel a little silly is all.
October 28, 2023 at 9:25 PM
R.E.M has successfully conditioned me to shout “Leonard Bernstein” and I guess I just feel a little silly is all.
Setting off the lunk alarm with my explosive diarrhea on the squat rack
October 19, 2023 at 5:00 PM
Setting off the lunk alarm with my explosive diarrhea on the squat rack
Not sure if anyone has thought of this but maybe Israel and Palestine should try to get along better? There was a kid in school who I didn’t get along with, but then we had to do a project together and he wasn’t that bad. Maybe they should try to do a science experiment together? Just spitballing
October 8, 2023 at 7:19 PM
Not sure if anyone has thought of this but maybe Israel and Palestine should try to get along better? There was a kid in school who I didn’t get along with, but then we had to do a project together and he wasn’t that bad. Maybe they should try to do a science experiment together? Just spitballing
Y’all too focused on the CBD when you should be worrying about the Slee-py tea
October 8, 2023 at 7:12 PM
Y’all too focused on the CBD when you should be worrying about the Slee-py tea
Just watched competition sailing on cbs that shit was so fucking cool dude. Those boats are so crazy I really had no idea.
September 30, 2023 at 7:04 PM
Just watched competition sailing on cbs that shit was so fucking cool dude. Those boats are so crazy I really had no idea.
Data: “it would appear, commander Riker, that our being here has led to the untimely death of senator Dianne Feinstein at the the age of 90, subsequently, starfleet and the federation no longer exist.”
September 29, 2023 at 4:33 PM
Data: “it would appear, commander Riker, that our being here has led to the untimely death of senator Dianne Feinstein at the the age of 90, subsequently, starfleet and the federation no longer exist.”
Just getting word from Feinstein’s people that she will be in for the upcoming session of congress, despite passing away early this morning.
September 29, 2023 at 4:20 PM
Just getting word from Feinstein’s people that she will be in for the upcoming session of congress, despite passing away early this morning.
People will often say that they don’t think senators in congress work hard enough, and I hope seeing Dianne Feinstein work herself into an early grave opens their eyes to the incredible commitment our wonderful politicians have to making the world a worse place for everyone.
September 29, 2023 at 4:11 PM
People will often say that they don’t think senators in congress work hard enough, and I hope seeing Dianne Feinstein work herself into an early grave opens their eyes to the incredible commitment our wonderful politicians have to making the world a worse place for everyone.
According to IMDB ratings, “the Knick” is the best thing Steven Soderbergh ever made and I just think that’s pretty funny
September 23, 2023 at 6:43 PM
According to IMDB ratings, “the Knick” is the best thing Steven Soderbergh ever made and I just think that’s pretty funny
Centering my life around French toast in a big way
September 21, 2023 at 2:42 PM
Centering my life around French toast in a big way
I don’t think turning your house into a casino should be illegal. I also don’t think it should be illegal to take a guy out back and teach him a thing or two about tryna pull one over on ya. The federal government wants to imprison me for these ideas.
September 16, 2023 at 8:40 PM
I don’t think turning your house into a casino should be illegal. I also don’t think it should be illegal to take a guy out back and teach him a thing or two about tryna pull one over on ya. The federal government wants to imprison me for these ideas.
My Roku froze on “NASCAR AMERICA POST RACE” and I just can’t stop giggling at “America post-race”
Like.
Oh that’s where they keep hearing it.
Like.
Oh that’s where they keep hearing it.
September 16, 2023 at 8:23 PM
My Roku froze on “NASCAR AMERICA POST RACE” and I just can’t stop giggling at “America post-race”
Like.
Oh that’s where they keep hearing it.
Like.
Oh that’s where they keep hearing it.
Harvard genetically engineered Barack Obama to stop Hillary Clinton and turn black people into republicans, I won’t be taking questions thank you.
September 15, 2023 at 4:37 PM
Harvard genetically engineered Barack Obama to stop Hillary Clinton and turn black people into republicans, I won’t be taking questions thank you.
McDonald’s employee in front of me eating an ice cream cone at 10:30 am. To be fair I am at McDonald’s, this is his turf.
September 5, 2023 at 2:30 PM
McDonald’s employee in front of me eating an ice cream cone at 10:30 am. To be fair I am at McDonald’s, this is his turf.
God who invited this man?
God, the complete inability of the Twitter left to grasp that Joe Biden’s economy is pretty decent for poor people - and the abuse they heap on you if you make this point - kind of makes me despair for progressive politics in this country
August 31, 2023 at 5:53 PM
God who invited this man?
The moist mile
ruin a film by adding moist to the title:
the moist guys
the moist guys
ruin a film by adding moist to the title:
the moist connection
the moist connection
August 30, 2023 at 1:38 PM
The moist mile
“Hey are you going to Schrödinger’s party Friday?”
“Who’s gonna be there”
“I can’t be sure yet.”
“Who’s gonna be there”
“I can’t be sure yet.”
August 29, 2023 at 6:01 PM
“Hey are you going to Schrödinger’s party Friday?”
“Who’s gonna be there”
“I can’t be sure yet.”
“Who’s gonna be there”
“I can’t be sure yet.”
Can’t stop thinking about darkwing duck. How do we know his true motives are righteous? Can he be trusted? Are the moonlit streets safe for women and children?
August 29, 2023 at 2:02 PM
Can’t stop thinking about darkwing duck. How do we know his true motives are righteous? Can he be trusted? Are the moonlit streets safe for women and children?
Red version - Charizard, Alakazam, Machamp, onyx, Gyrados. Best game ever.
August 25, 2023 at 7:06 PM
Red version - Charizard, Alakazam, Machamp, onyx, Gyrados. Best game ever.
Reposted by Tedward
[foot fetishist who only knows the metric system] wait wait wait they measure you using 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵
August 22, 2023 at 6:01 PM
[foot fetishist who only knows the metric system] wait wait wait they measure you using 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵
Love seeing all the “if he gets rid of block then I’m REALLY gonna leave.”
Like. If you haven’t left already, you’re not going to. You have an addiction and not even changing the name of the app to the dumbest thing possible broke the spell. You’re a glutton for punishment please stop acting.
Like. If you haven’t left already, you’re not going to. You have an addiction and not even changing the name of the app to the dumbest thing possible broke the spell. You’re a glutton for punishment please stop acting.
August 21, 2023 at 12:43 PM
Love seeing all the “if he gets rid of block then I’m REALLY gonna leave.”
Like. If you haven’t left already, you’re not going to. You have an addiction and not even changing the name of the app to the dumbest thing possible broke the spell. You’re a glutton for punishment please stop acting.
Like. If you haven’t left already, you’re not going to. You have an addiction and not even changing the name of the app to the dumbest thing possible broke the spell. You’re a glutton for punishment please stop acting.