Depression-era sandwich makers were really onto something with peanut butter and pickle sandwiches, and I'm tired of being bullied for my views on the matter.

Two SUVs started doing synchronized slow-motion pirouettes right next to me on the road today, and I decided it was a fine day to work from home, actually.

Late stage capitalism be like

My most listened to album was metal covers of the Kpop Demon Hunters soundtrack, just fyi

I don't do spotify wrapped anymore. Now I do tidal rewind. It's like, totally different, man.

If you see me squint really hard and do weird things with my mouth for a second, that's just me rebooting my face after a critical social situation error.

"Well, I've always been very good at seasoning things, and doing that on the road sounds like an exciting opportunity."

Me applying for a salt truck driver job

@profanity.accountant tally my sins

Did you know that John Wick's full name is Jonathan Wichard?

Why did I sleep on Mr. Robot for so long? This show feels like if Neuromancer were grounded in a dystopian modern day setting instead of a dystopian future one.

I would like to issue a formal apology to the 3 followers I lost between the last two posts I made.

🎵 Conjunctivitis, what's your function? Dissuading sinners from butthole munchin' 🎵

Beauty is in the eye of the butt holder.

My little home office assistant got all tuckered out from all the emailin'

!!!

The scariest dreams are the ones where I really have to shit, can't find a place to shit, finally find a place to shit, can't stop shitting, people know I'm shitting, and then, as if that's not bad enough, I become aware that I'm dreaming and suddenly terrified that I shit the bed for realsies.

Accidentally picked the cat up pointy end first, that's on me

Lunch log

did you know that jc penny’s full name is jesus christ penny

Things I enjoy about a Metroid game:
-Moody
-Atmospheric
-Discovering and figuring things out for myself
-̶̶̶W̶̶̶i̶̶̶s̶̶̶e̶̶̶c̶̶̶r̶̶̶a̶̶̶c̶̶̶k̶̶̶i̶̶̶n̶̶̶g̶̶̶ ̶s̶̶̶i̶̶̶d̶̶̶e̶̶̶ ̶c̶̶̶h̶̶̶a̶̶̶r̶̶̶a̶̶̶c̶̶̶t̶̶̶e̶̶̶r̶̶̶s̶̶̶ ̶w̶̶̶h̶̶̶o̶̶̶ ̶c̶̶̶o̶̶̶m̶̶̶p̶̶̶l̶̶̶e̶̶̶t̶̶̶e̶̶̶l̶̶̶y̶̶̶ ̶r̶̶̶u̶̶̶i̶̶̶n̶̶̶ ̶t̶̶̶h̶̶̶e̶̶̶ ̶f̶̶̶i̶̶̶r̶̶̶s̶̶̶t̶̶̶ ̶t̶̶̶h̶̶̶r̶̶̶e̶̶̶e̶̶̶ ̶t̶̶̶h̶̶̶i̶̶̶n̶̶̶g̶̶̶s̶̶̶
-Great music

The new Steam Machine looks familiar...

Having hooded eyes is such a good natural defense mechanism if you're a stoner.

I wonder if anyone else in the office can tell that I'm naked under these clothes... 👀

Thanks to Arc Raiders, I now see my surroundings entirely in terms of what could be an openable container or not