Sharkey 🦈
@sharkey.bsky.social
Sharkey is a fictional character. Cautionary example that assholes might mistake for cool. Did not not invent the word "Metroidvania."
Pinned
Whole damn family in one place and got their laundry mixed up. Nieces arguing about whose hot pink pirate flag booty shorts are these.
*Plucks them off the pile*
"Those are mine."
:o :o
*Plucks them off the pile*
"Those are mine."
:o :o
January 7, 2026 at 9:38 PM
Whole damn family in one place and got their laundry mixed up. Nieces arguing about whose hot pink pirate flag booty shorts are these.
*Plucks them off the pile*
"Those are mine."
:o :o
*Plucks them off the pile*
"Those are mine."
:o :o
Waking up and frantically googling some shit at five AM
"Wtf are you doing?"
"I have to know if the bee girl is alright"
"From the blind melon video?"
"yeah..."
"Oh. How is she?"
"she's fine, she's like forty and works in a fertility clinic"
"Oh good."
Zzzzzzz
"Wtf are you doing?"
"I have to know if the bee girl is alright"
"From the blind melon video?"
"yeah..."
"Oh. How is she?"
"she's fine, she's like forty and works in a fertility clinic"
"Oh good."
Zzzzzzz
January 6, 2026 at 1:52 PM
Waking up and frantically googling some shit at five AM
"Wtf are you doing?"
"I have to know if the bee girl is alright"
"From the blind melon video?"
"yeah..."
"Oh. How is she?"
"she's fine, she's like forty and works in a fertility clinic"
"Oh good."
Zzzzzzz
"Wtf are you doing?"
"I have to know if the bee girl is alright"
"From the blind melon video?"
"yeah..."
"Oh. How is she?"
"she's fine, she's like forty and works in a fertility clinic"
"Oh good."
Zzzzzzz
I MUST FIND A MORE SUITABLE HOST BODY
January 4, 2026 at 1:50 AM
I MUST FIND A MORE SUITABLE HOST BODY
Today seems like a good day to wander out into the desert and smoke an absolute shitload of hash.
I mean, every day is but today is too.
I mean, every day is but today is too.
January 3, 2026 at 6:17 PM
Today seems like a good day to wander out into the desert and smoke an absolute shitload of hash.
I mean, every day is but today is too.
I mean, every day is but today is too.
¬_¬
quick strangle 2026 while it's still small and helpless
January 3, 2026 at 6:07 PM
¬_¬
A whole lot of window licking dipshits:
January 3, 2026 at 5:41 PM
A whole lot of window licking dipshits:
quick strangle 2026 while it's still small and helpless
January 1, 2026 at 8:08 AM
quick strangle 2026 while it's still small and helpless
Fuck all this we're doing deresolutions now.
a man in a futuristic suit is laying on the floor with his legs crossed
Alt: Sark from Tron getting his arms zapped while a graph paper Andross face talks shit
media.tenor.com
January 1, 2026 at 12:34 AM
Fuck all this we're doing deresolutions now.
Dude out of the blue that just froze at the sight of me, took out a flip phone and started snapping pictures while screaming "YOU'RE A FELONY! YOU'RE A FELONY!"
Just a guy with brain problems having a day, but memorable. Friends still call me a felony after that cus he weren't wrong.
Just a guy with brain problems having a day, but memorable. Friends still call me a felony after that cus he weren't wrong.
What's an insult you'll never forget?
December 28, 2025 at 2:02 AM
Dude out of the blue that just froze at the sight of me, took out a flip phone and started snapping pictures while screaming "YOU'RE A FELONY! YOU'RE A FELONY!"
Just a guy with brain problems having a day, but memorable. Friends still call me a felony after that cus he weren't wrong.
Just a guy with brain problems having a day, but memorable. Friends still call me a felony after that cus he weren't wrong.
Reposted by Sharkey 🦈
remember the reason for the season
December 25, 2024 at 3:58 AM
remember the reason for the season
Not to put to fine a point on it but I hate this fucking holiday. I hate how obligatory it is, how it preys on you if you want to give, hate that it turns care into something mean and small. Buy and burn and squeeze and fuck you if you can't. It profanes something that should be good and kind.
December 25, 2025 at 10:23 AM
Not to put to fine a point on it but I hate this fucking holiday. I hate how obligatory it is, how it preys on you if you want to give, hate that it turns care into something mean and small. Buy and burn and squeeze and fuck you if you can't. It profanes something that should be good and kind.
Merry Christmas to all and to all a *pops fangs and tries to kill you*
December 25, 2025 at 5:07 AM
Merry Christmas to all and to all a *pops fangs and tries to kill you*
Always down to rob a clown.
December 25, 2025 at 2:36 AM
Always down to rob a clown.
I always pictured this being sung by some kind of gross, venial little homunculus so it's nice to see that validated. Pops into my head every time the corgi runs off to eat cow shit or something.
let's all take a moment to remember that in the 80s Ferris Bueller "Oh Yeah" song by Yello, the singer is canonically a little fat creature who is simply living his best life and chilling
December 23, 2025 at 8:06 AM
I always pictured this being sung by some kind of gross, venial little homunculus so it's nice to see that validated. Pops into my head every time the corgi runs off to eat cow shit or something.
Relevant
December 21, 2025 at 8:47 AM
Relevant
The campaign continues.
Chester (a Juggalo wizard wielding a an exhaust pipe and catalytic converter as a staff/cudgel) is collecting wood to do arson.
Chester (a Juggalo wizard wielding a an exhaust pipe and catalytic converter as a staff/cudgel) is collecting wood to do arson.
December 20, 2025 at 11:58 PM
The campaign continues.
Chester (a Juggalo wizard wielding a an exhaust pipe and catalytic converter as a staff/cudgel) is collecting wood to do arson.
Chester (a Juggalo wizard wielding a an exhaust pipe and catalytic converter as a staff/cudgel) is collecting wood to do arson.
Thought I felt a chill like someone walked over my grave and sure enough
Who coined "Metroidvania"? It wasn't @jparish.bsky.social, and he'll be the first to tell you. Besides, there are far more interesting questions, like: How did it spread? Evolve? And what's it got to do with rickrolling?
Watch til the end for a post-credits sting.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=8set...
Watch til the end for a post-credits sting.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=8set...
The History Of The Word "Metroidvania" And How It Spread
YouTube video by Critical Kate (of A Critical Hit!)
www.youtube.com
December 20, 2025 at 8:37 PM
Thought I felt a chill like someone walked over my grave and sure enough
How I first read this while skimming past
December 20, 2025 at 6:30 PM
How I first read this while skimming past
"Is Die Hard a Chr..."
Shut The Fuck You.
Motherfuckin ALIEN is a Christmas movie if you want it to be. Also, hot dogs are tacos and you can put whatever the fuck you want on pizza. Go outside and grow a fuckin personality.
Shut The Fuck You.
Motherfuckin ALIEN is a Christmas movie if you want it to be. Also, hot dogs are tacos and you can put whatever the fuck you want on pizza. Go outside and grow a fuckin personality.
December 19, 2025 at 2:35 AM
"Is Die Hard a Chr..."
Shut The Fuck You.
Motherfuckin ALIEN is a Christmas movie if you want it to be. Also, hot dogs are tacos and you can put whatever the fuck you want on pizza. Go outside and grow a fuckin personality.
Shut The Fuck You.
Motherfuckin ALIEN is a Christmas movie if you want it to be. Also, hot dogs are tacos and you can put whatever the fuck you want on pizza. Go outside and grow a fuckin personality.
I've got the kind of pavlovian response to the fitgirl repack installer music usually reserved for console startup sounds
a close up of a white cat 's head on a black background .
Alt: extremely low quality gif of a white cat with its eyes just bopping its head and just vibing the fuck out
media.tenor.com
December 18, 2025 at 3:39 AM
I've got the kind of pavlovian response to the fitgirl repack installer music usually reserved for console startup sounds
"Oh hell why do you have to go out to poop all the damn time.
I'm sorry, that was rude. Everybody poops.
... Actually, that was just a lie to make you feel better. Nobody poops but you. What the fuck is wrong with you? It's weird."
I'm sorry, that was rude. Everybody poops.
... Actually, that was just a lie to make you feel better. Nobody poops but you. What the fuck is wrong with you? It's weird."
December 16, 2025 at 5:55 AM
"Oh hell why do you have to go out to poop all the damn time.
I'm sorry, that was rude. Everybody poops.
... Actually, that was just a lie to make you feel better. Nobody poops but you. What the fuck is wrong with you? It's weird."
I'm sorry, that was rude. Everybody poops.
... Actually, that was just a lie to make you feel better. Nobody poops but you. What the fuck is wrong with you? It's weird."
Dismayed to find myself animorphing into exactly the sort of cranky old hermit fuck Heinlein would probably think is really cool.
December 13, 2025 at 10:23 PM
Dismayed to find myself animorphing into exactly the sort of cranky old hermit fuck Heinlein would probably think is really cool.
That time John Ritter well actually'd James Earl Jones to death
December 11, 2025 at 5:31 AM
That time John Ritter well actually'd James Earl Jones to death