Misssassy_pants
@misssassypants.bsky.social
You can't smash the button fast enough to escape me | https://linktr.ee/misssassy_pants
Guess he should have written another version called "Jesus take the yoke".
He can be so literal sometimes....
He can be so literal sometimes....
September 19, 2025 at 2:50 PM
Guess he should have written another version called "Jesus take the yoke".
He can be so literal sometimes....
He can be so literal sometimes....
Saddened that our leaders won't be at ground zero today. I'm especially upset because my grandma died on 9/11.
9/11/13 but STILL.
9/11/13 but STILL.
September 11, 2025 at 2:40 PM
Saddened that our leaders won't be at ground zero today. I'm especially upset because my grandma died on 9/11.
9/11/13 but STILL.
9/11/13 but STILL.
"Trump is right about Chicago being worse than Afghanistan"
I think to myself as I board the bus behind a grown man holding half a chocolate cake and wearing a My Little Pony backpack.
I think to myself as I board the bus behind a grown man holding half a chocolate cake and wearing a My Little Pony backpack.
September 3, 2025 at 1:31 PM
"Trump is right about Chicago being worse than Afghanistan"
I think to myself as I board the bus behind a grown man holding half a chocolate cake and wearing a My Little Pony backpack.
I think to myself as I board the bus behind a grown man holding half a chocolate cake and wearing a My Little Pony backpack.
Streaming The Last of Us 2 - first play through. We're headed towards the aquarium
www.twitch.tv/misssassy_pa...
www.twitch.tv/misssassy_pa...
Twitch
Twitch is the world
www.twitch.tv
May 15, 2025 at 12:21 AM
Streaming The Last of Us 2 - first play through. We're headed towards the aquarium
www.twitch.tv/misssassy_pa...
www.twitch.tv/misssassy_pa...
Horse corpses, shamblers, farts OH MY! just another day being The Last of Us. (2)
www.tiktok.com/t/ZT2GPtJ5e/
www.tiktok.com/t/ZT2GPtJ5e/
March 21, 2025 at 2:36 PM
Horse corpses, shamblers, farts OH MY! just another day being The Last of Us. (2)
www.tiktok.com/t/ZT2GPtJ5e/
www.tiktok.com/t/ZT2GPtJ5e/
When your cat pukes up round worms and you slurp those bad boys up bc ozempic, in this economy?
March 3, 2025 at 3:52 PM
When your cat pukes up round worms and you slurp those bad boys up bc ozempic, in this economy?
Ever look at the toilet after a shit and think, "NOW is the time to weigh myself!"
February 25, 2025 at 3:16 PM
Ever look at the toilet after a shit and think, "NOW is the time to weigh myself!"
Reposted by Misssassy_pants
i got stung by a radioactive bee i can't fly or make honey, but my knees look fucking spectacular
February 22, 2025 at 8:14 PM
i got stung by a radioactive bee i can't fly or make honey, but my knees look fucking spectacular
Tinder match: I'm into bondage and S&M
Me: ...
TM: ... you there?
Me: Do you have a Costco membership?
Me: ...
TM: ... you there?
Me: Do you have a Costco membership?
February 21, 2025 at 4:41 PM
Tinder match: I'm into bondage and S&M
Me: ...
TM: ... you there?
Me: Do you have a Costco membership?
Me: ...
TM: ... you there?
Me: Do you have a Costco membership?
I wish we could all have the confidence of a 70 year old woman changing in the locker room at the YMCA.
February 20, 2025 at 2:25 PM
I wish we could all have the confidence of a 70 year old woman changing in the locker room at the YMCA.
Me: Hurry up! If Mommy is late to work, then I get fired, and we don't have money to pay the rent, and then we're homeless.
*a few hours later*
Kid: [spots homeless person on the street] Looks like that guy was late to work
*a few hours later*
Kid: [spots homeless person on the street] Looks like that guy was late to work
February 19, 2025 at 10:38 PM
Me: Hurry up! If Mommy is late to work, then I get fired, and we don't have money to pay the rent, and then we're homeless.
*a few hours later*
Kid: [spots homeless person on the street] Looks like that guy was late to work
*a few hours later*
Kid: [spots homeless person on the street] Looks like that guy was late to work
If you see me posting my old tweets on here... no you didn't
February 15, 2025 at 5:05 PM
If you see me posting my old tweets on here... no you didn't
We're back. So are the jump scares and the burps... apparently
February 6, 2025 at 4:06 PM
We're back. So are the jump scares and the burps... apparently
Reposted by Misssassy_pants
CAPTCHA: are you a human
ME: yes
CAPTCHA: oh i am so sorry
ME: yes
CAPTCHA: oh i am so sorry
January 23, 2025 at 3:58 AM
CAPTCHA: are you a human
ME: yes
CAPTCHA: oh i am so sorry
ME: yes
CAPTCHA: oh i am so sorry
Reposted by Misssassy_pants
People who ask when your birthday is like to think about your parents making love.
January 23, 2025 at 2:04 PM
People who ask when your birthday is like to think about your parents making love.
It's been a minute, but I'm back on stream! Fortnite all night! And by all night, I mean until 9pm cst.
www.twitch.tv/misssassy_pa...
www.twitch.tv/misssassy_pa...
January 23, 2025 at 1:01 AM
It's been a minute, but I'm back on stream! Fortnite all night! And by all night, I mean until 9pm cst.
www.twitch.tv/misssassy_pa...
www.twitch.tv/misssassy_pa...
Switzerland has started using an AI Jesus in confessions, and all the altar boys collectively let out a sigh of relief
December 13, 2024 at 3:12 PM
Switzerland has started using an AI Jesus in confessions, and all the altar boys collectively let out a sigh of relief
Show me your pet and what they are named after:
November 27, 2024 at 2:34 PM
Show me your pet and what they are named after:
I hardly know her
November 27, 2024 at 2:29 PM
I hardly know her
Let Elon use my tweets for training his AI. He'll be so groundbreaking for having the first AI that requires therapy.
November 18, 2024 at 3:25 PM
Let Elon use my tweets for training his AI. He'll be so groundbreaking for having the first AI that requires therapy.
Caption this:
November 14, 2024 at 2:43 PM
Caption this:
People playing Fortnite: Oh man, I want that skin! I wanna wear all these skins, I don't know which one to pick!
Leatherface: [ears perk up]
Leatherface: [ears perk up]
November 5, 2024 at 7:05 PM
People playing Fortnite: Oh man, I want that skin! I wanna wear all these skins, I don't know which one to pick!
Leatherface: [ears perk up]
Leatherface: [ears perk up]