MilkmanDanimal
@milkmandanimal.bsky.social
Generally human, lover of cats, guitars, D&D, and other humans
July 26, 2024 at 3:10 PM
Reposted by MilkmanDanimal
The timeline right now looks like an Ewok party after the Death Star exploded
May 30, 2024 at 9:11 PM
The timeline right now looks like an Ewok party after the Death Star exploded
Used the Google Assistant's voice feature to set a reminder to "do hose" for 2:00 p.m. and it instead spelled it "do hoes" and now I am very much wondering what kind of information Google is using to think that was the right word to use there.
December 6, 2023 at 11:24 PM
Used the Google Assistant's voice feature to set a reminder to "do hose" for 2:00 p.m. and it instead spelled it "do hoes" and now I am very much wondering what kind of information Google is using to think that was the right word to use there.
My wife bought a 4.5 pound jar of maraschino cherries to make her yearly chocolate-covered cherries. It is large. We have spent the last hour trying to find it in our house.
She says she "put it somewhere we wound find it," which, so far, seems less than entirely true.
She says she "put it somewhere we wound find it," which, so far, seems less than entirely true.
November 18, 2023 at 6:40 PM
My wife bought a 4.5 pound jar of maraschino cherries to make her yearly chocolate-covered cherries. It is large. We have spent the last hour trying to find it in our house.
She says she "put it somewhere we wound find it," which, so far, seems less than entirely true.
She says she "put it somewhere we wound find it," which, so far, seems less than entirely true.
Halloween outfit is Boring Middle-Aged Suburbanite; considered trying for Sexy Boring Middle-Aged Suburbanite but then realize mirrors exist and after checking one realized that would have been more than a little difficult.
October 31, 2023 at 5:59 PM
Halloween outfit is Boring Middle-Aged Suburbanite; considered trying for Sexy Boring Middle-Aged Suburbanite but then realize mirrors exist and after checking one realized that would have been more than a little difficult.
Good: Realizing the wife is out for the night so I can cook something aromatic and spicy without annoying her.
Good: Making authentic Kung Pao shrimp, getting out the Sichuan peppercorn and dried peppers, and preparing them.
Not So Good: Forgetting you just did that and rubbing your eyes.
Good: Making authentic Kung Pao shrimp, getting out the Sichuan peppercorn and dried peppers, and preparing them.
Not So Good: Forgetting you just did that and rubbing your eyes.
October 20, 2023 at 10:43 PM
Good: Realizing the wife is out for the night so I can cook something aromatic and spicy without annoying her.
Good: Making authentic Kung Pao shrimp, getting out the Sichuan peppercorn and dried peppers, and preparing them.
Not So Good: Forgetting you just did that and rubbing your eyes.
Good: Making authentic Kung Pao shrimp, getting out the Sichuan peppercorn and dried peppers, and preparing them.
Not So Good: Forgetting you just did that and rubbing your eyes.
Always a good sign when your players request a throwback from a beloved earlier D&D Halloween adventure you ran; now I just have to figure out why the vampire cows have come back to threaten the land again.
October 18, 2023 at 8:04 PM
Always a good sign when your players request a throwback from a beloved earlier D&D Halloween adventure you ran; now I just have to figure out why the vampire cows have come back to threaten the land again.
Iowa beats Wisconsin 15-6; QB Deacon Hill was 6-14 for 37 yards. Brian Ferentz is a legend. In a very bad way.
October 15, 2023 at 12:34 AM
Iowa beats Wisconsin 15-6; QB Deacon Hill was 6-14 for 37 yards. Brian Ferentz is a legend. In a very bad way.
Reposted by MilkmanDanimal
"You boy, what day is this??"
October 13, 2023 at 7:04 AM
"You boy, what day is this??"
Microsoft has officially acquired Activision-Blizzard; the part of me that realizes endless corporate consolidation is bad on many levels is in conflict with the part of me that knows ActiBlizz's management were toxic, awful douchebags and Microsoft has traditionally been better in many ways.
October 13, 2023 at 3:32 PM
Microsoft has officially acquired Activision-Blizzard; the part of me that realizes endless corporate consolidation is bad on many levels is in conflict with the part of me that knows ActiBlizz's management were toxic, awful douchebags and Microsoft has traditionally been better in many ways.
www.amazon.com/Poop-Like-Ch...
Someone is selling Poop Like a Champion cereal. Is this the convergence? Have old SNL commercials achieved sentience?
Someone is selling Poop Like a Champion cereal. Is this the convergence? Have old SNL commercials achieved sentience?
October 10, 2023 at 4:16 PM
www.amazon.com/Poop-Like-Ch...
Someone is selling Poop Like a Champion cereal. Is this the convergence? Have old SNL commercials achieved sentience?
Someone is selling Poop Like a Champion cereal. Is this the convergence? Have old SNL commercials achieved sentience?
Reposted by MilkmanDanimal
I have eaten
the plums
that were in
the icebox
and which
you were probably
saving
for breakfast
haha you've been
just completely
fuckin owned
plumless asshole
the plums
that were in
the icebox
and which
you were probably
saving
for breakfast
haha you've been
just completely
fuckin owned
plumless asshole
June 12, 2023 at 3:48 AM
I have eaten
the plums
that were in
the icebox
and which
you were probably
saving
for breakfast
haha you've been
just completely
fuckin owned
plumless asshole
the plums
that were in
the icebox
and which
you were probably
saving
for breakfast
haha you've been
just completely
fuckin owned
plumless asshole
Oh, Caroline Polachek was in Chairlift? A band I really liked?
This may explain why I like her voice so much.
This may explain why I like her voice so much.
October 6, 2023 at 8:54 PM
Oh, Caroline Polachek was in Chairlift? A band I really liked?
This may explain why I like her voice so much.
This may explain why I like her voice so much.
patch.com/minnesota/mi...
You know, sometimes it's just best to not read the headline, as nothing was ever going to live up to "Giraffe Poop Intended For Jewelry Seized At MSP Airport: Officials".
You know, sometimes it's just best to not read the headline, as nothing was ever going to live up to "Giraffe Poop Intended For Jewelry Seized At MSP Airport: Officials".
October 5, 2023 at 7:13 PM
patch.com/minnesota/mi...
You know, sometimes it's just best to not read the headline, as nothing was ever going to live up to "Giraffe Poop Intended For Jewelry Seized At MSP Airport: Officials".
You know, sometimes it's just best to not read the headline, as nothing was ever going to live up to "Giraffe Poop Intended For Jewelry Seized At MSP Airport: Officials".
What if the 5G call did actually turn me into a zombie and since I'm a 53-year-old guy who lives in the suburbs and works from home I just haven't noticed?
October 4, 2023 at 9:11 PM
What if the 5G call did actually turn me into a zombie and since I'm a 53-year-old guy who lives in the suburbs and works from home I just haven't noticed?
When the alert went off I was biking to the auto body shop to pick a car up; feel pretty safe if this is the apocalypse, because I'm guessing zombies aren't going to want the brain of somebody who was stupid enough to back into a car sitting in his own driveway.
October 4, 2023 at 6:56 PM
When the alert went off I was biking to the auto body shop to pick a car up; feel pretty safe if this is the apocalypse, because I'm guessing zombies aren't going to want the brain of somebody who was stupid enough to back into a car sitting in his own driveway.
The bad thing about Kevin McCarthy being utterly humiliated by being removed as Speaker of the House is
October 3, 2023 at 9:09 PM
The bad thing about Kevin McCarthy being utterly humiliated by being removed as Speaker of the House is
So . . . Monday Night Football. I would suggest while I always appreciate daring, innovative offensive ideas in the game of Football, the Giants deciding to actually play a game with five literally dead men instead of an offensive line is proving to be a less than entirely sound concept in practice.
October 3, 2023 at 3:00 AM
So . . . Monday Night Football. I would suggest while I always appreciate daring, innovative offensive ideas in the game of Football, the Giants deciding to actually play a game with five literally dead men instead of an offensive line is proving to be a less than entirely sound concept in practice.
Handed out two more Bluesky invites; it's becoming apparent being a 53-year-old suburbanite means I do not have a social circle who understands how cool I am in having multiple invites that nobody wants.
The struggle is real.
The struggle is real.
October 3, 2023 at 2:51 AM
Handed out two more Bluesky invites; it's becoming apparent being a 53-year-old suburbanite means I do not have a social circle who understands how cool I am in having multiple invites that nobody wants.
The struggle is real.
The struggle is real.
Dr. Ian Malcolm:
Yeah, but your Eggo scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn't stop to think if they should.
Yeah, but your Eggo scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn't stop to think if they should.
September 27, 2023 at 7:42 PM
Dr. Ian Malcolm:
Yeah, but your Eggo scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn't stop to think if they should.
Yeah, but your Eggo scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn't stop to think if they should.
I realize NFL Bluesky isn't much of a thing yet, but, to pretend it is, the best thing I can say about Desmond Ridder as a QB is he doesn't fumble when he takes stupid sacks.
September 24, 2023 at 7:12 PM
I realize NFL Bluesky isn't much of a thing yet, but, to pretend it is, the best thing I can say about Desmond Ridder as a QB is he doesn't fumble when he takes stupid sacks.
Me normally: "I have to find ways to reduce my impact on the environment, we've only got one planet."
Me spending five minutes trying to get a new bag open for the compost bin: "WHAT THE FUCK WHY IS IT STUCK TOGETHER SO MUCH I WILL BURN FIVE TREES AND PUNCH A SQUIRREL IN THE GODDAMN FACE."
Me spending five minutes trying to get a new bag open for the compost bin: "WHAT THE FUCK WHY IS IT STUCK TOGETHER SO MUCH I WILL BURN FIVE TREES AND PUNCH A SQUIRREL IN THE GODDAMN FACE."
September 22, 2023 at 5:07 PM
Me normally: "I have to find ways to reduce my impact on the environment, we've only got one planet."
Me spending five minutes trying to get a new bag open for the compost bin: "WHAT THE FUCK WHY IS IT STUCK TOGETHER SO MUCH I WILL BURN FIVE TREES AND PUNCH A SQUIRREL IN THE GODDAMN FACE."
Me spending five minutes trying to get a new bag open for the compost bin: "WHAT THE FUCK WHY IS IT STUCK TOGETHER SO MUCH I WILL BURN FIVE TREES AND PUNCH A SQUIRREL IN THE GODDAMN FACE."
Man goes to doctor. Says he's depressed. Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone in a threatening world where what lies ahead is vague and uncertain.
Doctor says, "You think that's bad, this meal cost me $78 at Newark Airport."
Doctor says, "You think that's bad, this meal cost me $78 at Newark Airport."
September 21, 2023 at 8:22 PM
Man goes to doctor. Says he's depressed. Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone in a threatening world where what lies ahead is vague and uncertain.
Doctor says, "You think that's bad, this meal cost me $78 at Newark Airport."
Doctor says, "You think that's bad, this meal cost me $78 at Newark Airport."
Reposted by MilkmanDanimal
i have sold
the plums
that were in
the icebox
and which
you were probably
saving
for breakfast
Forgive me
some fool was paying
seventy-eight
dollars for them
the plums
that were in
the icebox
and which
you were probably
saving
for breakfast
Forgive me
some fool was paying
seventy-eight
dollars for them
September 21, 2023 at 7:56 PM
i have sold
the plums
that were in
the icebox
and which
you were probably
saving
for breakfast
Forgive me
some fool was paying
seventy-eight
dollars for them
the plums
that were in
the icebox
and which
you were probably
saving
for breakfast
Forgive me
some fool was paying
seventy-eight
dollars for them
There will never be enough words to describe how great boygenius has turned out to be.
boygenius - Cool About It (official music video)
directed by Lauren Tsai“the record” is out now: https://boygenius.lnk.to/therecord follow boygenius:website: https://www.xboygeniusx.commerch store: https://...
youtu.be
September 20, 2023 at 5:18 PM
There will never be enough words to describe how great boygenius has turned out to be.