Lindsay Robertson
@lindsayrobertson.bsky.social
Editor. Writer. Comedy nerd. She/her.
https://www.orderhistory.net
https://www.orderhistory.net
Pinned
Order History
A newsletter and blog about the things I bought to magically make my life perfect.
www.orderhistory.net
I have a new newsletter called Order History about my misadventures in retail therapy. The first one came out today! Aesop hand soap will change my life:
ONCE AGAIN, we find that "Mr. Show with Bob and David" predicted EVERYTHING. www.youtube.com/watch?v=UojL...
Mr. Show- Hitler Clones
YouTube video by DeeMillionaire212
www.youtube.com
November 13, 2025 at 1:33 PM
ONCE AGAIN, we find that "Mr. Show with Bob and David" predicted EVERYTHING. www.youtube.com/watch?v=UojL...
Hey, the latest ORDER HISTORY just went up! Subscribe for free (no paywalls!) and read about "SEXY" HALLOWEEN COSTUME FAILS! With special guest @unclegrambo.bsky.social
"Sexy" Halloween Costume Fails
Featuring special guest Mark Graham!
www.orderhistory.net
October 28, 2025 at 3:12 PM
Hey, the latest ORDER HISTORY just went up! Subscribe for free (no paywalls!) and read about "SEXY" HALLOWEEN COSTUME FAILS! With special guest @unclegrambo.bsky.social
Nobel Prize to whoever can fix the maddening H2/H3 spacing issue in *EVERY* CMS! (If you don't know what I'm talking about, I envy you!)
October 28, 2025 at 2:06 PM
Nobel Prize to whoever can fix the maddening H2/H3 spacing issue in *EVERY* CMS! (If you don't know what I'm talking about, I envy you!)
Reposted by Lindsay Robertson
I want more people to care that SNAP benefits are being cut off on November 1. 40% of SNAP beneficiaries are children. This is callous and vile.
October 22, 2025 at 12:33 AM
I want more people to care that SNAP benefits are being cut off on November 1. 40% of SNAP beneficiaries are children. This is callous and vile.
Who wants to bankroll my Seven Brides for Seven Brothers revival: Seven Partners for Seven People?
October 4, 2025 at 11:29 PM
Who wants to bankroll my Seven Brides for Seven Brothers revival: Seven Partners for Seven People?
Reposted by Lindsay Robertson
What the fuck do you mean I got a longer prison sentence than Diddy
NEW YORK (AP) — Sean ‘Diddy’ Combs sentenced to 4 years and 2 months in prison in case involving sex workers, violence and ‘freak-offs’.
October 3, 2025 at 9:40 PM
What the fuck do you mean I got a longer prison sentence than Diddy
Pretty soon you're going to be able to buy human organs on Quince.
September 28, 2025 at 11:55 PM
Pretty soon you're going to be able to buy human organs on Quince.
I'm in the same sinking boat, but I would buy ANY of these if I could!
🧵 UPDATE FOR MY BIRTHDAY:
Hi, so AI killed my career(s) and I'm still barely holding on. Some people tried to get me to start a fundraiser, but that felt weird, so I thought maybe if I was contributing something? So I started making shirts. Can you share this and maybe think about grabbing some?
Hi, so AI killed my career(s) and I'm still barely holding on. Some people tried to get me to start a fundraiser, but that felt weird, so I thought maybe if I was contributing something? So I started making shirts. Can you share this and maybe think about grabbing some?
Stuff, from The Internet
tylerfromtheinternet.com
September 28, 2025 at 11:06 PM
I'm in the same sinking boat, but I would buy ANY of these if I could!
I just got the Notify NYC alert that the entire South Street Seaport area is closed due to Jude Law chewing all the scenery in "Black Rabbit."
September 28, 2025 at 2:18 PM
I just got the Notify NYC alert that the entire South Street Seaport area is closed due to Jude Law chewing all the scenery in "Black Rabbit."
From lindsayism.com's "About" page, published in August of 2006 (six years into my BLOGGING JOURNEY or whatever). It's all still true (as long as "exotic food" is defined as, like, most meat).
September 27, 2025 at 9:29 PM
From lindsayism.com's "About" page, published in August of 2006 (six years into my BLOGGING JOURNEY or whatever). It's all still true (as long as "exotic food" is defined as, like, most meat).
17 months now, and I am losing all hope. I've been working since I started my first business at 12. I've never had any trouble finding work in my entire life until this. I am awesome. Maris is awesomer. We've all been afraid of asteroids when we should have seen The Greatest Depression on its way.
I always thought when it was time for a mid career change of profession there would be professions left.
September 27, 2025 at 9:10 PM
17 months now, and I am losing all hope. I've been working since I started my first business at 12. I've never had any trouble finding work in my entire life until this. I am awesome. Maris is awesomer. We've all been afraid of asteroids when we should have seen The Greatest Depression on its way.
Speaking of Crazy Amelia Earhart Things, I am trying to save lindsayism.com from the Typepad shutdown happening in <48 hours, and I found this and I LIKE IT? www.lindsayism.com/2009/09/amel...
lindsayism.com
September 27, 2025 at 8:55 PM
Speaking of Crazy Amelia Earhart Things, I am trying to save lindsayism.com from the Typepad shutdown happening in <48 hours, and I found this and I LIKE IT? www.lindsayism.com/2009/09/amel...
People who only send out paywalled
Substacks should be completely socially ostracized. People who do this for AFFILIATE Substacks should be sent to Mars.
Substacks should be completely socially ostracized. People who do this for AFFILIATE Substacks should be sent to Mars.
September 20, 2025 at 10:39 PM
People who only send out paywalled
Substacks should be completely socially ostracized. People who do this for AFFILIATE Substacks should be sent to Mars.
Substacks should be completely socially ostracized. People who do this for AFFILIATE Substacks should be sent to Mars.
Reposted by Lindsay Robertson
what a delight to talk about the ridiculous purchase of a sous vide for @lindsayrobertson.bsky.social's ORDER HISTORY, which (spoiler alert) did not actually fix my life: www.orderhistory.net/tyler-coates...
Tyler Coates buys a sous vide cooker
When a "hot tub for meat" isn't as appetizing as that sounds.
www.orderhistory.net
September 12, 2025 at 5:20 PM
what a delight to talk about the ridiculous purchase of a sous vide for @lindsayrobertson.bsky.social's ORDER HISTORY, which (spoiler alert) did not actually fix my life: www.orderhistory.net/tyler-coates...
Somehow obtaining EU citizenship is now the American Dream.
September 5, 2025 at 4:00 PM
Somehow obtaining EU citizenship is now the American Dream.
Reposted by Lindsay Robertson
nothing is more For Me than @lindsayrobertson.bsky.social writing about the Broadcast News dress: www.orderhistory.net/omg-i-found-...
OMG, I found the 'Broadcast News' dress (kinda)
When online thrifting goes wrong.
www.orderhistory.net
September 3, 2025 at 5:28 PM
nothing is more For Me than @lindsayrobertson.bsky.social writing about the Broadcast News dress: www.orderhistory.net/omg-i-found-...
I hope something interesting happens
tonight because I’m at my sister’s place for the weekend and it would be fun to always remember finding out about interesting news together.
tonight because I’m at my sister’s place for the weekend and it would be fun to always remember finding out about interesting news together.
September 1, 2025 at 12:28 AM
I hope something interesting happens
tonight because I’m at my sister’s place for the weekend and it would be fun to always remember finding out about interesting news together.
tonight because I’m at my sister’s place for the weekend and it would be fun to always remember finding out about interesting news together.
Lotta people forgetting they believe billionaires should not exist today!
August 26, 2025 at 11:45 PM
Lotta people forgetting they believe billionaires should not exist today!
There won’t be a Vanity Fair in a year.
Area Critic (Me) Needs New Job.
Reach out if you want me to write for you! Doesn't have to be reviews!
Reach out if you want me to write for you! Doesn't have to be reviews!
Vanity Fair Will Refocus on Hollywood and Cut Back Some Coverage Areas, Says New Editorial Director
Vanity Fair will scale back certain areas of coverage, including shutting down The Hive, to focus on entertainment and culture, editorial director Mark Guiducci said.
variety.com
August 13, 2025 at 1:22 AM
There won’t be a Vanity Fair in a year.
I never got to call anyone a sweet summer child while it was still acceptable.
August 11, 2025 at 9:20 PM
I never got to call anyone a sweet summer child while it was still acceptable.
RFK Jr. is canceling the cancer vaccine and there is not yet an absolute horde of people with terminal diagnoses who want to be the biggest heroes of the 21st Century??!! It should be like Orient Express meets irl Black Friday already.
August 6, 2025 at 12:04 AM
RFK Jr. is canceling the cancer vaccine and there is not yet an absolute horde of people with terminal diagnoses who want to be the biggest heroes of the 21st Century??!! It should be like Orient Express meets irl Black Friday already.
Was just reading about all the Florida idiots who are sick from raw milk and remembered a year ago in Paris in the grocery holding up a bottle of milk trying to communicate with the clerk and resorting to “ummmmmmm Louis… Pasteur?” (This did not work.)
August 5, 2025 at 11:25 PM
Was just reading about all the Florida idiots who are sick from raw milk and remembered a year ago in Paris in the grocery holding up a bottle of milk trying to communicate with the clerk and resorting to “ummmmmmm Louis… Pasteur?” (This did not work.)
Issue 5 of ORDER HISTORY is out and free, with no paywalls on any posts!
Hangover remedies, reviewed
From someone who has tried them all. (Except that Kardashian IV thing.)
www.orderhistory.net
August 1, 2025 at 2:21 PM
Issue 5 of ORDER HISTORY is out and free, with no paywalls on any posts!
Instagram autocorrects “bootlicker” to “footlocker” lol.
July 25, 2025 at 7:12 PM
Instagram autocorrects “bootlicker” to “footlocker” lol.
Issue 4 of ORDER HISTORY is out now! (I forgot to promote it last week, but if you read last week's, you might get why.) Subscribing is free and gets you all regular issues!
The great fermentation failure of 2023
From fresh vegetables to rat food in a few easy steps.
www.orderhistory.net
July 25, 2025 at 5:46 PM
Issue 4 of ORDER HISTORY is out now! (I forgot to promote it last week, but if you read last week's, you might get why.) Subscribing is free and gets you all regular issues!