Kiz
kizzythesecond.bsky.social
Kiz
@kizzythesecond.bsky.social
Mad, motherish, mentally a bit special.
On the bus, my brain's meandering, and by a very circuitous route has arrived at:

Sparkle. Farts.

Like, (says my brain) wouldn't it be cool if farts were announced in a cloud of glitter? And possibly vanilla scent? We could all be real-life fairies!

No (says I to my brain). Imagine the hoovering!
November 11, 2025 at 2:42 PM
Had a lovely couple of hours with my mum, moaning about Stuff™️ and starting the Christmas shopping. *engage smug mode*
a close up of a man 's face with the website www.i-traps.com visible in the corner
ALT: a close up of a man 's face with the website www.i-traps.com visible in the corner
media.tenor.com
November 11, 2025 at 2:02 PM
I love this. This is how you write a Bond movie!
Obligatory millenial *phwoar* moment for silver-fox Brosnan.

Okay, right: here’s how you make a a Bond movie.

Step one: You go to your average school playground and round up some daft wee boys (age 7-9). Ask them what would be cool.

Omit anything with dinosaurs or superpowers.
Maiden, Mother(fucker), and Crone, if you will
November 11, 2025 at 1:37 PM
Reposted by Kiz
It is time to do this again.
Love being reminded to do this every year. It's a win/win all round
November 11, 2025 at 11:35 AM
Reposted by Kiz
Right. Here's my big pitch:

Muppet James Bond

James Bond in…A Heart-Felt Goodbye

Dominic Cooper as Bond
Kermit M Frog
Mrs Moneypiggy
Beaker & Dr Bunsen HoneyQ

The agents of G.O.N.Z.O. want to kidnap the world's chickens. MI5 has a mole (Rizzo the Rat). An agent is undercover as a chef in Sweden.
December 4, 2024 at 3:35 PM
HE IS FINISHED!!! (Also alt)

Bertie Booty stands 15inches tall and weighs a pound. He is made from ultra-chunky yellow chenille yarn, has orange safety eyes, a hand-embroidered muzzle, and a patch which says 'keep smiling you'.

And. A. Butt.

Based on a pattern from @peachpenguincrochet on insta.
November 11, 2025 at 10:39 AM
Reposted by Kiz
I find it wryly amusing that people listing the biases witnessed in BBC reporting seem to have forgotten, or be fine with, the appalling coverage of the Indy Ref in 2014.
November 11, 2025 at 9:14 AM
I have less than 70 stitches to finish my latest crochet project.

I am procrastinating like a mofo to avoid it...*deep cleans the bathroom, invents time travel, alphabetically files sock drawer***
November 11, 2025 at 9:32 AM
I have just heard the Ella Fitzgerald/Louis Armstrong version of 'Summertime' from PORGY AND BESS for the first time and my tiny mind is BLOWN, all.

I have loved this song for years, but this version is PERFECT. WOW. Just gosh.
November 11, 2025 at 9:06 AM
It wasn’t until I finished this goblin that I realised it looks like Richard O’Brien…

Anyway, here’s ’really bloody annoyed’, as requested by my spawn.
November 11, 2025 at 8:26 AM
Reposted by Kiz
If there’s any message I feel has been hammered home to me recently by newsy stuff and several interviews I’ve seen, it’s that money might make life easier in some ways it really doesn’t make you happy. Truly, that ONLY comes from inside. Nothing material will help. 🥰
November 11, 2025 at 8:09 AM
My mood in goblins.
November 11, 2025 at 7:34 AM
A bad poem about my brain

Got the mania buzz
My brain's all fizzy
With the absolute need
To be totally busy

But I've also got
ADHD paralysis
And procrastination
It is what it is

I hate being like this
Hard place meeting rock
Weasels in control
Fresh outta luck
November 11, 2025 at 7:15 AM
Reposted by Kiz
I’m in this with my film music column and a bonus article talking about Krull (won’t be in the next one cause off the hospital so get your fill )
November 10, 2025 at 10:05 PM
I have a lump on my tongue, right where it joins my gums at the back. And its giving me earache too. It's not an ulcer, because the bonjela-stuff is having zero effect.

I made the mistake of asking doctor Google, so I am now of course dying of something horrible. #Idiot
November 10, 2025 at 6:33 PM
This one’s all me :)
November 10, 2025 at 12:13 PM
Another collaboration with @eeveehearts.bsky.social :)
November 10, 2025 at 8:47 AM
Another me-n-@eeveehearts collab.
November 9, 2025 at 8:23 PM
Thank you to @eeveehearts.bsky.social who offered some brilliant ideas for collaboration ♥️
November 9, 2025 at 6:18 PM
This afternoon sees The Critical Shits, our DnD group, welcome my older son's girlfriend as an observer. If she likes it, we may well have a new member for the next game!
November 9, 2025 at 1:34 PM
November 9, 2025 at 10:11 AM
Would anyone be interested in collaborating with me? I’m looking for someone to write 4-panel comics or jokes that I could illustrate. Not for money, sadly, just to put joy into the world. Credit will be shard fully.

DM if interested x
November 9, 2025 at 7:06 AM
Here’s my #SundayPixMirror (frame 1)
November 9, 2025 at 7:04 AM
Yay, hugs! Morning sweetheart.
November 9, 2025 at 6:11 AM
Very weird dreams about taking ecstasy, having sex in the bath, getting my epidermis peeled off by a guy I once knew (using tweezers) while the band of the Royal Marines played, and finding out I was scheduled for open heart surgery while awake.

I hate my head.
November 9, 2025 at 5:34 AM