Simon J
@hobnobking.bsky.social
One of those late middle-aged men with a large synthesiser collection you were warned about. Widower. Single Dad. Excelling at both. Cymraeg
A man in a 'Cat Daddy' hoodie attempting to bully an old couple off a table for four in a cafe, and failing, has cheered me rrrrrrrright up, lads.
November 14, 2025 at 4:29 PM
A man in a 'Cat Daddy' hoodie attempting to bully an old couple off a table for four in a cafe, and failing, has cheered me rrrrrrrright up, lads.
I found myself standing in The Range considering buying one of those two foot tall Christmas trees with battery powered lights and all the decorations fixed to it, today.
The plan was to move the tree from room to room as I do so I don't have to decorate more than one.
Oh God.
The plan was to move the tree from room to room as I do so I don't have to decorate more than one.
Oh God.
November 12, 2025 at 10:28 PM
I found myself standing in The Range considering buying one of those two foot tall Christmas trees with battery powered lights and all the decorations fixed to it, today.
The plan was to move the tree from room to room as I do so I don't have to decorate more than one.
Oh God.
The plan was to move the tree from room to room as I do so I don't have to decorate more than one.
Oh God.
Nice to see so many people who were perpetually scandalised by my inclination for punching racists (Ooooo, there's never ANY need for violence piety) are finally coming round to the idea.
November 11, 2025 at 10:05 AM
Nice to see so many people who were perpetually scandalised by my inclination for punching racists (Ooooo, there's never ANY need for violence piety) are finally coming round to the idea.
Monday morning coffee with my crowd and I walked in halfway through a conversation between Bel and Alison that involved phrases like "we're contemplating our third" "it's so expensive now" and "I'm not getting any younger"
They were talking about labradors.
They were talking about labradors.
November 10, 2025 at 11:40 AM
Monday morning coffee with my crowd and I walked in halfway through a conversation between Bel and Alison that involved phrases like "we're contemplating our third" "it's so expensive now" and "I'm not getting any younger"
They were talking about labradors.
They were talking about labradors.
I could run the BBC lads. I've single parented two girls from the ground up and the early years of doing that were the perfect preparation. And the middle years. And sometimes the now years....anyway my point is I wouldn't have resigned from it even if I could have.
November 9, 2025 at 10:23 PM
I could run the BBC lads. I've single parented two girls from the ground up and the early years of doing that were the perfect preparation. And the middle years. And sometimes the now years....anyway my point is I wouldn't have resigned from it even if I could have.
Lads, a link I clicked on, on Vinted took me to an IQ test which I completed exceptionally quickly and with a score in the top 8% but it wouldn't tell me what precisely unless I enabled notifications and gave them my email address.
November 9, 2025 at 10:13 PM
Lads, a link I clicked on, on Vinted took me to an IQ test which I completed exceptionally quickly and with a score in the top 8% but it wouldn't tell me what precisely unless I enabled notifications and gave them my email address.
Oh, and I can't stress this enough, fuck yeah.
November 9, 2025 at 4:13 PM
Oh, and I can't stress this enough, fuck yeah.
Had lunch at the HQ of the North Wales mafia, lads. By which I mean Italian Welsh women with chubby toddlers and immaculate husbands who are fffery 'appy to see you.
November 8, 2025 at 4:42 PM
Had lunch at the HQ of the North Wales mafia, lads. By which I mean Italian Welsh women with chubby toddlers and immaculate husbands who are fffery 'appy to see you.
Bought 3 tubs of Quality Street in Tesco for £3.95 each and, as usual, had to put them in a cupboard in the attic so we can both survive until Christmas.
November 6, 2025 at 4:10 PM
Bought 3 tubs of Quality Street in Tesco for £3.95 each and, as usual, had to put them in a cupboard in the attic so we can both survive until Christmas.
Reposted by Simon J
Nothing says Christmas more than a revolving dart board 'luck numbers' thing with clangy demonic 'music' from The Range
...
...
November 6, 2025 at 12:04 PM
Nothing says Christmas more than a revolving dart board 'luck numbers' thing with clangy demonic 'music' from The Range
...
...
Feeding ducks with a gang of old men is hugely therapeutic. Second only to eating KFC with a table of chatty 5-9 year old kids. Nobody talks about work, nobody talks about money, nobody talks about Starmer, nobody is in the throes of divorce. Should be available on the NHS.
November 6, 2025 at 12:00 PM
Feeding ducks with a gang of old men is hugely therapeutic. Second only to eating KFC with a table of chatty 5-9 year old kids. Nobody talks about work, nobody talks about money, nobody talks about Starmer, nobody is in the throes of divorce. Should be available on the NHS.
It's Bonfire night vs Sámi the cockatoo and I know who my money's on.
November 5, 2025 at 5:14 PM
It's Bonfire night vs Sámi the cockatoo and I know who my money's on.
I've banged the top of my bald head ever so gently on the edge of a kitchen cabinet and I already look like prom scene Carrie.
November 5, 2025 at 10:28 AM
I've banged the top of my bald head ever so gently on the edge of a kitchen cabinet and I already look like prom scene Carrie.
That face you make when you pay a fortune for several subscription sports channels and you still can't watch the match.
November 4, 2025 at 7:36 PM
That face you make when you pay a fortune for several subscription sports channels and you still can't watch the match.
An extraordinary number of people spend an extraordinary amount of time bitching about how other people use social media.
Even now, someone will be rolling their eyes and huffing because I used extraordinary twice in the same sentence.
Even now, someone will be rolling their eyes and huffing because I used extraordinary twice in the same sentence.
November 3, 2025 at 10:41 PM
An extraordinary number of people spend an extraordinary amount of time bitching about how other people use social media.
Even now, someone will be rolling their eyes and huffing because I used extraordinary twice in the same sentence.
Even now, someone will be rolling their eyes and huffing because I used extraordinary twice in the same sentence.
Been to an 87 year old's birthday party and I've ducked out early to sit on my couch and take it easy, lads.
November 2, 2025 at 5:14 PM
Been to an 87 year old's birthday party and I've ducked out early to sit on my couch and take it easy, lads.
Go on, make him work as a gardener on the estate. You know you want to.
October 30, 2025 at 7:17 PM
Go on, make him work as a gardener on the estate. You know you want to.
So, to sum up, Zara Sultana doesn't much care what happens in Ukraine. Both sides fail her ideology test.
October 27, 2025 at 5:18 PM
So, to sum up, Zara Sultana doesn't much care what happens in Ukraine. Both sides fail her ideology test.
I'll - and this is the important bit, be the judge of that, Nigel.
October 27, 2025 at 4:24 PM
I'll - and this is the important bit, be the judge of that, Nigel.
I paid £1250 for my home office chair entirely because it made me look like the captain of a Scandi minimalist starship during video calls.
October 27, 2025 at 11:24 AM
I paid £1250 for my home office chair entirely because it made me look like the captain of a Scandi minimalist starship during video calls.
Well, I'm out of hospital, lads. One of my implanted devices has been remapped, so you should think of me 65 reg BMW 3 series with aftermarket alloys from now on.
October 27, 2025 at 11:14 AM
Well, I'm out of hospital, lads. One of my implanted devices has been remapped, so you should think of me 65 reg BMW 3 series with aftermarket alloys from now on.
Chris Mason will be devastated that his efforts to force Reform into every sentence he speaks have'nt paid off.
October 24, 2025 at 10:40 AM
Chris Mason will be devastated that his efforts to force Reform into every sentence he speaks have'nt paid off.
Well, my heart went haywire again the other day, so I've been in hospital attached to many and varied machines for a couple of days and now I have my own room and fewer machines. My heart is a cranky cyborg these days, two implanted devices have metronomed and shocked it into getting me this far.
October 23, 2025 at 5:49 PM
Well, my heart went haywire again the other day, so I've been in hospital attached to many and varied machines for a couple of days and now I have my own room and fewer machines. My heart is a cranky cyborg these days, two implanted devices have metronomed and shocked it into getting me this far.
People really are thrilled to have that clip of Haredi Jews to use as a stick to beat Israeli Jews with, aren't they?
Feels a bit like me wheeling out the anti-white elements of my wife's family to give me a character reference.
Feels a bit like me wheeling out the anti-white elements of my wife's family to give me a character reference.
October 20, 2025 at 8:51 PM
People really are thrilled to have that clip of Haredi Jews to use as a stick to beat Israeli Jews with, aren't they?
Feels a bit like me wheeling out the anti-white elements of my wife's family to give me a character reference.
Feels a bit like me wheeling out the anti-white elements of my wife's family to give me a character reference.
I've been leaf blowing, lads.
After a coffee I'm going to blow the same leaves into a better, more piley pile.
Retirement.
After a coffee I'm going to blow the same leaves into a better, more piley pile.
Retirement.
October 20, 2025 at 9:52 AM
I've been leaf blowing, lads.
After a coffee I'm going to blow the same leaves into a better, more piley pile.
Retirement.
After a coffee I'm going to blow the same leaves into a better, more piley pile.
Retirement.