Gabriel Valdez
@gabrieldv.bsky.social
Writer, movie critic, appreciator of good nonsense, unionize everything.
Writing:
https://basilmarinerchase.wordpress.com/
Patreon:
https://www.patreon.com/GabrielValdez
Writing:
https://basilmarinerchase.wordpress.com/
Patreon:
https://www.patreon.com/GabrielValdez
"It's a silly thing, but in the hands of people who know how to instill a serious, beating heart inside of a silly thing, so that it’s not just a lark for us to forget as soon as we walk out of the theater, but a whole emotional center that can stick with us and keep making us smile."
Mythic Pixie Drone Quarrel — “Predator: Badlands”
“Predator: Badlands” is very good. It’s fun, it’s crowd-pleasing. It does what it says on the tin. It’s two giant, 45-minute roving action set pieces that orbit around 10 minutes …
basilmarinerchase.wordpress.com
November 13, 2025 at 7:04 PM
"It's a silly thing, but in the hands of people who know how to instill a serious, beating heart inside of a silly thing, so that it’s not just a lark for us to forget as soon as we walk out of the theater, but a whole emotional center that can stick with us and keep making us smile."
"If her novel is grief caught in amber, his film is a lens through which we can see how desperately it tried to reach out, to breathe, to last another moment, both grief and griever alike; to become something else, to transmute meaning from suffering, to justify endurance."
Empathy First, the Rest Nowhere — “Frankenstein”
The characters in Guillermo Del Toro’s adaptation of Mary Shelley’s “Frankenstein” only ever encounter empathy briefly. It never lasts. Life, for them, is an endurance, and yet through …
basilmarinerchase.wordpress.com
November 10, 2025 at 6:06 PM
"If her novel is grief caught in amber, his film is a lens through which we can see how desperately it tried to reach out, to breathe, to last another moment, both grief and griever alike; to become something else, to transmute meaning from suffering, to justify endurance."
Among the best weeks for women leads I've covered.
New Shows + Movies by Women — Lawrence. Snook. Fanning. Lee. Jeon. Sennott. Ritter. Shipka.
It’s an absolutely loaded week, so screw the preamble and let’s jump straight in. New shows by women this week come from South Korea and the U.S. New films by women come from Canada, Fr…
basilmarinerchase.wordpress.com
November 6, 2025 at 5:36 PM
Among the best weeks for women leads I've covered.
Star Rail: What if your mom Franz Kafka and her gamer pal hacked the universe to attack a Terry Pratchett Witch's space station where she homunculuses life-sized puppets to make a Matrix to research gods inside and later you have to Inception Space Greece with time travel to bring back the dead?
November 6, 2025 at 6:32 AM
Star Rail: What if your mom Franz Kafka and her gamer pal hacked the universe to attack a Terry Pratchett Witch's space station where she homunculuses life-sized puppets to make a Matrix to research gods inside and later you have to Inception Space Greece with time travel to bring back the dead?
For when oppressive horror no longer feels like escapism, please find within:
2 great found footage horrors,
2 experiments that have fun with their genres, and
1 Krysten Ritter glam witch.
2 great found footage horrors,
2 experiments that have fun with their genres, and
1 Krysten Ritter glam witch.
5 Overlooked Horror Movies That Are a Little Less Bleak
Horror can be pretty oppressive, and it’s difficult to feel like that’s the escapism I want right now. But some evoke a different feeling. Some horror movies are scary while being more …
basilmarinerchase.wordpress.com
October 31, 2025 at 5:47 PM
For when oppressive horror no longer feels like escapism, please find within:
2 great found footage horrors,
2 experiments that have fun with their genres, and
1 Krysten Ritter glam witch.
2 great found footage horrors,
2 experiments that have fun with their genres, and
1 Krysten Ritter glam witch.
"Deep down, it forces us to glimpse the repulsion of an uncanny valley that each of us carries within ourselves, something that’s increasingly lured out bit by bit in the social media age, that we’re then taught to frenzy and lure out of each other."
The Road Taken — “Perfect Blue”
When I think of my top 10 films, the titles on it shift and change between a good 30 titles. There are two films that make each version of the list, and Satoshi Kon’s “Perfect Blue” is always…
basilmarinerchase.wordpress.com
October 28, 2025 at 6:19 PM
"Deep down, it forces us to glimpse the repulsion of an uncanny valley that each of us carries within ourselves, something that’s increasingly lured out bit by bit in the social media age, that we’re then taught to frenzy and lure out of each other."
Pippin: But what about Fetterman?
Aragorn: You already have him.
Pippin: We've had one, yes. But what about second Fetterman?
Merry: Don't think he knows about second Fetterman, Pip.
Pippin: What about homophobia? Victim blaming? No voting record? That tattoo? He knows about them, doesn't he?
Aragorn: You already have him.
Pippin: We've had one, yes. But what about second Fetterman?
Merry: Don't think he knows about second Fetterman, Pip.
Pippin: What about homophobia? Victim blaming? No voting record? That tattoo? He knows about them, doesn't he?
October 23, 2025 at 3:00 AM
Pippin: But what about Fetterman?
Aragorn: You already have him.
Pippin: We've had one, yes. But what about second Fetterman?
Merry: Don't think he knows about second Fetterman, Pip.
Pippin: What about homophobia? Victim blaming? No voting record? That tattoo? He knows about them, doesn't he?
Aragorn: You already have him.
Pippin: We've had one, yes. But what about second Fetterman?
Merry: Don't think he knows about second Fetterman, Pip.
Pippin: What about homophobia? Victim blaming? No voting record? That tattoo? He knows about them, doesn't he?
This show is such an unexpected and needed highlight.
Power. Fantasy. Power. “May I Ask for One Final Thing?”
This is gold. That’s Scarlet, casually landing on top of some second-rate noble to stop a dragon from killing a high-ranking one. Why? Because her fists have hungered to beat him to a pulp fo…
basilmarinerchase.wordpress.com
October 21, 2025 at 5:18 PM
This show is such an unexpected and needed highlight.
The horror boom finally arrives.
New Shows + Movies by Women — No One Saw Us Leave the Astronaut Last Summer
It’s an extremely good week, and you can see horror start to leave its mark as we close in on Halloween. We’ve got procedural horror, alien horror, 90s revival horror, wholesome horror,…
basilmarinerchase.wordpress.com
October 16, 2025 at 4:26 PM
The horror boom finally arrives.
A vengeful genie. A self-regulated psychopath who refuses to use her wishes. A love story, kind of? A surprisingly responsible and moving exploration of regulating psychopathy? A powerhouse... slapstick performance? Evil real-estate angel? I...what is even going on?
A Psychopath and Her Genie — “Genie, Make a Wish”
A genie has been trapped in his lamp for nearly 1,000 years. See, he made a bet with God that he could prove humans were always corruptible, but then came across a dying girl whose wishes helped ot…
basilmarinerchase.wordpress.com
October 14, 2025 at 6:45 PM
A vengeful genie. A self-regulated psychopath who refuses to use her wishes. A love story, kind of? A surprisingly responsible and moving exploration of regulating psychopathy? A powerhouse... slapstick performance? Evil real-estate angel? I...what is even going on?
New A24 weirdness. A Korean romance sees a psychopath who's trained to keep herself in check find a trickster genie. We're continuing to see a few more women directors in anime. And more.
New Shows + Movies by Women — “Genie, Make a Wish”, “If I Had Legs I’d Kick You”
There’s a ton of work this week, and it comes from around the world. There’s a big new Korean romantic drama, I’m glad to see Summer’s upswing in women directing continue in…
basilmarinerchase.wordpress.com
October 9, 2025 at 4:50 PM
New A24 weirdness. A Korean romance sees a psychopath who's trained to keep herself in check find a trickster genie. We're continuing to see a few more women directors in anime. And more.
Japan's 2 for 2 in shows about women drummers knocking sh*t over this year. And like the last, this is absolutely phenomenal.
Rock is a Lady’s Modesty — “Glass Heart”
Don’t worry about the subtitles here, the show’s got them. Akane stands in a stranger’s yard, delivery in hand. There’s a note on the front door to go in and drop it off. Sh…
basilmarinerchase.wordpress.com
October 6, 2025 at 5:56 PM
Japan's 2 for 2 in shows about women drummers knocking sh*t over this year. And like the last, this is absolutely phenomenal.
Since this is getting floated again:
"A “Passion of the Christ 5” filmed in Italy with 10% American crew would get an exemption. Something filmed in the U.S. with 90% American crew but with VFX work done in India might face a massive tariff...it’ll be based on pay-offs and political views."
"A “Passion of the Christ 5” filmed in Italy with 10% American crew would get an exemption. Something filmed in the U.S. with 90% American crew but with VFX work done in India might face a massive tariff...it’ll be based on pay-offs and political views."
A 100% Tariff on Art is a Ban, and Would Cost U.S. Jobs
The other day, Trump announced that he would seek to place tariffs of 100% on films made outside the U.S. We see a lot of concepts floated by this administration. Not all of them come to pass, but …
basilmarinerchase.wordpress.com
September 30, 2025 at 2:08 AM
Since this is getting floated again:
"A “Passion of the Christ 5” filmed in Italy with 10% American crew would get an exemption. Something filmed in the U.S. with 90% American crew but with VFX work done in India might face a massive tariff...it’ll be based on pay-offs and political views."
"A “Passion of the Christ 5” filmed in Italy with 10% American crew would get an exemption. Something filmed in the U.S. with 90% American crew but with VFX work done in India might face a massive tariff...it’ll be based on pay-offs and political views."
Scarlett Johansson's directorial debut, Italian action-comedy, French romance, and who wouldn't let Willem Dafoe live in their basement, what could go wrong?
New Shows + Movies by Women — “Man in My Basement”, “Eleanor the Great”
This week’s pretty exciting, with Scarlett Johansson’s intriguing directorial debut, a Willem Dafoe horror, an Italian action-comedy, and a French romance – among other things. It’…
basilmarinerchase.wordpress.com
September 25, 2025 at 4:12 PM
Scarlett Johansson's directorial debut, Italian action-comedy, French romance, and who wouldn't let Willem Dafoe live in their basement, what could go wrong?
Congratulations on getting through this week.
New Shows + Movies by Women — “Black Rabbit”, “Billionaires’ Bunker”
Oceanside cave with no one for miles for year-round hermitagoh hi, I thought I was still in the search bar for a second there. Welcome to the end of this week. We made it? Since I don’t know …
basilmarinerchase.wordpress.com
September 18, 2025 at 4:50 PM
Congratulations on getting through this week.
New K-dramas and British dramas lead the way...
...and I wrestle with whether the art and artists outweigh the hideousness of the corporation that hosts their work...and how the critical industry is failing to have this larger conversation.
...and I wrestle with whether the art and artists outweigh the hideousness of the corporation that hosts their work...and how the critical industry is failing to have this larger conversation.
New Shows + Movies by Women — “Tempest”, “The Hardacres”, “The Girlfriend”
One thing I’ve been debating this year is when to stop or re-start coverage of a specific service if, say, the corporation it’s attached to is super hideous. I try my best to gauge the …
basilmarinerchase.wordpress.com
September 11, 2025 at 5:02 PM
New K-dramas and British dramas lead the way...
...and I wrestle with whether the art and artists outweigh the hideousness of the corporation that hosts their work...and how the critical industry is failing to have this larger conversation.
...and I wrestle with whether the art and artists outweigh the hideousness of the corporation that hosts their work...and how the critical industry is failing to have this larger conversation.
This whole experiment - parodies of sports previews - is different from what I normally write, but I badly needed to stretch my joke muscles. That's been hard to do this year and I know enough about this to make fun of it under any circumstances.
This one's mostly about Chicago vs. New York pizza.
This one's mostly about Chicago vs. New York pizza.
An NFL Preview for People Sick of the NFL — The NFC West
There’s only one favorite kind of pizza. Arizona Cardinals Annual search for the Cardinals after the bye week. There’s a 23-season stretch from 1985 to 2007 where the Cardinals managed …
basilmarinerchase.wordpress.com
September 4, 2025 at 4:28 PM
This whole experiment - parodies of sports previews - is different from what I normally write, but I badly needed to stretch my joke muscles. That's been hard to do this year and I know enough about this to make fun of it under any circumstances.
This one's mostly about Chicago vs. New York pizza.
This one's mostly about Chicago vs. New York pizza.
The horrible people who own the Broncos, the horrible people who play for the Chiefs, and the perfect time for Yellowstone to erupt.
An NFL Preview for People Sick of the NFL – The AFC West
How many teams do Walmart heirs own, exactly? Denver Broncos CW: Some flashing images “Oh no no no no fuck” speaks to my soul. This could be the year someone topples the Chiefs. Who wil…
basilmarinerchase.wordpress.com
September 3, 2025 at 5:29 PM
The horrible people who own the Broncos, the horrible people who play for the Chiefs, and the perfect time for Yellowstone to erupt.
First some jokes. Then: every other awful thing I've talked about team owners doing pales in comparison to what the Saints did.
An NFL Preview for People Sick of the NFL — The NFC South
I got jokes that I don’t know how to fuse to what I talk about with the Saints. I’ll put them last with a content warning. Enjoy until then! Skip the Saints at the end if necessary. Atl…
basilmarinerchase.wordpress.com
September 2, 2025 at 5:30 PM
First some jokes. Then: every other awful thing I've talked about team owners doing pales in comparison to what the Saints did.
I continue my football preview that barely talks about football, such as: Good Morning Football introducing an A.I. co-host on...Labor Day. That timing sure isn't a mistake.
An NFL Preview for People Sick of the NFL — The NFC North
Labor Day was created to recognize the contributions and sacrifices of laborers and labor rights activists. The NFL decided to celebrate it by introducing an A.I. co-host to its flagship morning pr…
basilmarinerchase.wordpress.com
September 1, 2025 at 5:04 PM
I continue my football preview that barely talks about football, such as: Good Morning Football introducing an A.I. co-host on...Labor Day. That timing sure isn't a mistake.
The one time I'll say something nice about an NFL owner, why do we keep forgetting how organizationally creepy the Texans are, and the city that's everything you've ever dreamed of.
An NFL Preview for People Sick of the NFL — The AFC South
The rules say someone’s got to win this division, but they don’t say I have to care: Houston Texans, I guess Hot mic of Houston being asked about its division. The greatest thing that e…
basilmarinerchase.wordpress.com
August 28, 2025 at 6:13 PM
The one time I'll say something nice about an NFL owner, why do we keep forgetting how organizationally creepy the Texans are, and the city that's everything you've ever dreamed of.
Sorry to be an SEO-chaser and lead with a picture of Aaron Rodgers.
An NFL Preview for People Sick of the NFL – The AFC North
This division contains multitudes. Three teams were named after endangered regional delicacies: the poetic Raven, unionized manufacturing jobs, and Ohio’s largest predator, Rep. Jim Jorda- uh…
basilmarinerchase.wordpress.com
August 27, 2025 at 7:55 PM
Sorry to be an SEO-chaser and lead with a picture of Aaron Rodgers.
Weird that so many NFL owners are linked back to a Florida town known for its palms and beaches an hour north of Miami, sometimes for very creepy shit.
Must be a coincidence.
Must be a coincidence.
An NFL Preview for People Sick of the NFL — The AFC East
I only root for teams where it snows. But maybe not these ones. Buffalo Bills Every three decades, it happens. One of the teams I like to emulate when I play a football video game is those early-90…
basilmarinerchase.wordpress.com
August 26, 2025 at 4:36 PM
Weird that so many NFL owners are linked back to a Florida town known for its palms and beaches an hour north of Miami, sometimes for very creepy shit.
Must be a coincidence.
Must be a coincidence.
An experiment, to be weird and funny and sad about something I love and hate.
An NFL Preview for People Sick of the NFL — The NFC East
When I was very young, I thought hate would be something people used for things like football teams they didn’t like. Dallas Cowboys Jerry Jones manages. The Cowboys are a team of middle-mana…
basilmarinerchase.wordpress.com
August 25, 2025 at 5:22 PM
An experiment, to be weird and funny and sad about something I love and hate.
Tackling a Jackie Chan fight this week, and trying something difficult at the end: breaking down the body mechanics of a complex move in a way that may (or may not) help you understand how it's done.
Fight Scene Friday — “Dragons Forever”
As good as the martial arts and stunt performances are in “Dragons Forever”, it’s the filmmaking that makes this one of my favorite fight scenes. Don’t let it trick you into thinking th…
basilmarinerchase.wordpress.com
August 22, 2025 at 7:02 PM
Tackling a Jackie Chan fight this week, and trying something difficult at the end: breaking down the body mechanics of a complex move in a way that may (or may not) help you understand how it's done.