Declan
declan.orkhid.com
Declan
@declan.orkhid.com
Logging onto the be ignored simulator
the staff in computer repair shop on the top floor of stephen’s green shopping centre always look out at ya as if ya caught them in the middle of committing a crime.
November 21, 2025 at 1:05 PM
The movie Signs (2002), a Brazilian parent at a birthday party catches shaky low res footage of Enoch coming out of a bush at the end of an alleyway.
Enoch Burke spotted in "that alley where Batman's parents were shot" in between Abbey Street and Eden Quay.
November 21, 2025 at 12:49 PM
I do find it gas that seamus heaney and me step da used to be drinking buddies
November 21, 2025 at 12:32 PM
AI Assistant, but its a darts player:
hey, hit triple 20 please
"sure thing!" *hits triple 1*
November 21, 2025 at 11:23 AM
we shouldn’t be teaching rocks how to think
November 21, 2025 at 10:36 AM
RTÉ have 52! news correspondents
November 17, 2025 at 9:33 PM
ya know a band will be good when their main photo on streaming platforms is like a candid shot of three strangers in the kitchen at a house party.
November 16, 2025 at 6:11 PM
all those voice ChatGPT responses have a super pissy and patronising tone and the people using them don’t seem to notice.
November 15, 2025 at 7:55 PM
November 15, 2025 at 6:17 PM
wee cousin making me watch Death Note and its notttt bad.
November 13, 2025 at 11:26 PM
am fond of singing or humming a tune while putting the bins out at night or whatever. just in case there’s a serial killer or some cryptid about to kill me. just to add to the atmosphere of it.
November 13, 2025 at 7:42 PM
this should be the “property ladder”
November 13, 2025 at 5:31 PM
dee dee you’re doon this. you’re goin the moon.
November 11, 2025 at 1:42 PM
why are all subscriptions plans like

1 shoe for €24.99 p/m
Or
every single pair of shoes in the shop for €95.99 p/m (billed annually)
November 9, 2025 at 8:09 PM
November 8, 2025 at 9:39 PM
was getting a 9G signal off this one the other day before it vanished
November 8, 2025 at 3:01 PM
the iPhone is too customisable now. bring back no wallpapers.
November 8, 2025 at 2:13 PM
when you’re watching video on instagram and it randomly decides to refresh the feed. great feature that.
November 4, 2025 at 2:31 PM
pov: reading bluesky posts, south of glyfada.
October 30, 2025 at 10:03 AM
using AI for art is the modern (and worse) version of “did you trace tha” in art classes.
October 29, 2025 at 5:20 PM
when anybody irl asks me what do I think of tommy robinson my go to response is “is that the fella that’s always crying on camera” usually winds them up. good craic.
Elon Musk: "It is time for the English to ally with the hard men, like Tommy Robinson, and fight for their survival or they shall surely all die" 29th October 2025. 2 million views in its first hour.
October 29, 2025 at 10:01 AM
washing detergents using athletes for advertising specific aspects of their product. fast athlete? Use for fast wash stuff. Tall athlete? Use for bigger pod ads etc
October 25, 2025 at 7:49 PM
I was nearly going to extend an olive branch to the dubs and be like ya know what, coddle isn’t that bad, but reports are coming in of pineapple goin in it now.
October 25, 2025 at 6:56 PM
would love a time machine to go back one year and ask the people spoiling their vote with Maria Steen no.1 who she is and them being like who?
October 25, 2025 at 11:02 AM
right going to vote now
October 24, 2025 at 4:55 PM