Dan Schwab
@danschwab.bsky.social
Blue AF for years.
Let's get started (again).
No DMs please,
except from Desi Lydic.
And even then, Desi... Keep it casual.
Let's get started (again).
No DMs please,
except from Desi Lydic.
And even then, Desi... Keep it casual.
Pinned
Dan Schwab
@danschwab.bsky.social
· Sep 10
I know this sounds insane, but I’ve got this letter I found years ago. It's a letter Jeffrey Epstein sent to Trump FROM PRISON.
Crazy, right? Don’t ask how I got it. It’s amazing what you stumble across in a New Jersey landfill when you’re trying to hide evidence of your own. Anyway…
Crazy, right? Don’t ask how I got it. It’s amazing what you stumble across in a New Jersey landfill when you’re trying to hide evidence of your own. Anyway…
No thank you! I am not vaccinated against Kid Rock. I did not build up enough antibawitabodies.
(Also frightened by the "and more" like there are musician STDs I still haven't heard about yet.)
(Also frightened by the "and more" like there are musician STDs I still haven't heard about yet.)
January 14, 2026 at 4:50 PM
No thank you! I am not vaccinated against Kid Rock. I did not build up enough antibawitabodies.
(Also frightened by the "and more" like there are musician STDs I still haven't heard about yet.)
(Also frightened by the "and more" like there are musician STDs I still haven't heard about yet.)
It used to be "What if his art was successful?"
Now it's "What if his casinos were successful?"
🤔
Now it's "What if his casinos were successful?"
🤔
January 9, 2026 at 2:28 PM
It used to be "What if his art was successful?"
Now it's "What if his casinos were successful?"
🤔
Now it's "What if his casinos were successful?"
🤔
I don't know now. I think I'm more and more sure I saw Charlie Kirk lunge at that sniper in an aggressive way...
January 8, 2026 at 8:11 PM
I don't know now. I think I'm more and more sure I saw Charlie Kirk lunge at that sniper in an aggressive way...
Hey, Greenland! Just wanted to remind you that Trump's people are remarkably stupid & if Hegseth's boyz come for you, take a cue from "Blazing Saddles" & build a fake Greenland in the Arctic. Guaranteed they'd be shooting and r@ping mannequins for hours before they realize they'd been hornswoggled.
January 7, 2026 at 1:17 PM
Hey, Greenland! Just wanted to remind you that Trump's people are remarkably stupid & if Hegseth's boyz come for you, take a cue from "Blazing Saddles" & build a fake Greenland in the Arctic. Guaranteed they'd be shooting and r@ping mannequins for hours before they realize they'd been hornswoggled.
Hey, Greenland! Just wanted to remind you that Trump's people are remarkably stupid & if Hegseth's boyz come for you, take a cue from "Blazing Saddles" & build a fake Greenland in the Arctic. Guaranteed they'd be shooting and r@ping mannequins for hours before they realize they'd been hornswoggled.
January 7, 2026 at 1:14 PM
Hey, Greenland! Just wanted to remind you that Trump's people are remarkably stupid & if Hegseth's boyz come for you, take a cue from "Blazing Saddles" & build a fake Greenland in the Arctic. Guaranteed they'd be shooting and r@ping mannequins for hours before they realize they'd been hornswoggled.
America's got, like, the worst dictator...
"Tremble, other countries... Our guy can recognize a giraffe on a cognitive test!"
"Tremble, other countries... Our guy can recognize a giraffe on a cognitive test!"
January 7, 2026 at 1:10 PM
America's got, like, the worst dictator...
"Tremble, other countries... Our guy can recognize a giraffe on a cognitive test!"
"Tremble, other countries... Our guy can recognize a giraffe on a cognitive test!"
When you take a quick glance at this YouTube menu pic... and before you realize the time code is blocking an essential element of a letter... completely changing your inference.... and then you think, "What if...?"
January 6, 2026 at 11:48 AM
When you take a quick glance at this YouTube menu pic... and before you realize the time code is blocking an essential element of a letter... completely changing your inference.... and then you think, "What if...?"
It's OK. The President of FIFA now realizes his grave mistake...
Next month, he will be presenting Trump the
"War Prize."
The statue will look pretty much the same.
Next month, he will be presenting Trump the
"War Prize."
The statue will look pretty much the same.
January 4, 2026 at 5:59 PM
It's OK. The President of FIFA now realizes his grave mistake...
Next month, he will be presenting Trump the
"War Prize."
The statue will look pretty much the same.
Next month, he will be presenting Trump the
"War Prize."
The statue will look pretty much the same.
Years from now, Venezuela is going to have their own Indiana Jones movie.
And guess what oppressive regime is gonna be the bad guys??
And guess what oppressive regime is gonna be the bad guys??
January 4, 2026 at 10:50 AM
Years from now, Venezuela is going to have their own Indiana Jones movie.
And guess what oppressive regime is gonna be the bad guys??
And guess what oppressive regime is gonna be the bad guys??
I totally feel Dr. Manhattan when he said,
"Fuck this planet. I'm gonna build my OWN civilization! With blackjack! And hookers!"
"Fuck this planet. I'm gonna build my OWN civilization! With blackjack! And hookers!"
January 4, 2026 at 2:40 AM
I totally feel Dr. Manhattan when he said,
"Fuck this planet. I'm gonna build my OWN civilization! With blackjack! And hookers!"
"Fuck this planet. I'm gonna build my OWN civilization! With blackjack! And hookers!"
Remember what it was like to wake up to the most boring news?
Gen X Farms remembers...
Gen X Farms remembers...
January 3, 2026 at 1:49 PM
Remember what it was like to wake up to the most boring news?
Gen X Farms remembers...
Gen X Farms remembers...
Reposted by Dan Schwab
I heard they originally invaded a vuvuzela factory due to a misspelled Signal chat...
January 3, 2026 at 1:21 PM
I heard they originally invaded a vuvuzela factory due to a misspelled Signal chat...
Let me know when she gets to "Acceptance... of the life insurance check."
January 3, 2026 at 1:20 PM
Let me know when she gets to "Acceptance... of the life insurance check."
This is no way to get a non-soccer Peace Prize...
January 3, 2026 at 12:22 PM
This is no way to get a non-soccer Peace Prize...
Wow... it's effed up how Trump's White House has a whole legal department just to address "butthurtness."
(In retrospect, I should have put "legal department" in quotes as well...)
(In retrospect, I should have put "legal department" in quotes as well...)
Trump-Kennedy Center says it plans to sue jazz musician who canceled Christmas performance over Trump name change
The Trump-Kennedy Center says it plans to sue jazz musician Chuck Redd after he canceled a Christmas performance after Trump's name was added to the building.
abcnews.go.com
December 31, 2025 at 10:46 AM
Wow... it's effed up how Trump's White House has a whole legal department just to address "butthurtness."
(In retrospect, I should have put "legal department" in quotes as well...)
(In retrospect, I should have put "legal department" in quotes as well...)
In my time, a saner time, we used to have cartoon cat rappers. And the country was doing just dandy. Where are they now? The way America is coming apart at the seams, we need cartoon cat rappers now more than at any time in history.
December 27, 2025 at 2:17 PM
In my time, a saner time, we used to have cartoon cat rappers. And the country was doing just dandy. Where are they now? The way America is coming apart at the seams, we need cartoon cat rappers now more than at any time in history.
Reposted by Dan Schwab
"It's A Wonderful Life" isn't just a feel-good holiday classic (and my favorite movie of all time).
It's also a warning about what happens when greed runs the economy.
It's also a warning about what happens when greed runs the economy.
Robert Reich Reacts: “It's a Wonderful Life”
Robert Reich
www.youtube.com
December 25, 2025 at 3:00 PM
"It's A Wonderful Life" isn't just a feel-good holiday classic (and my favorite movie of all time).
It's also a warning about what happens when greed runs the economy.
It's also a warning about what happens when greed runs the economy.
I figured, since I put some work into this one, I'd repost it one more time on this supposed Epstein Files eve...
I know this sounds insane, but I’ve got this letter I found years ago. It's a letter Jeffrey Epstein sent to Trump FROM PRISON.
Crazy, right? Don’t ask how I got it. It’s amazing what you stumble across in a New Jersey landfill when you’re trying to hide evidence of your own. Anyway…
Crazy, right? Don’t ask how I got it. It’s amazing what you stumble across in a New Jersey landfill when you’re trying to hide evidence of your own. Anyway…
December 18, 2025 at 9:43 PM
I figured, since I put some work into this one, I'd repost it one more time on this supposed Epstein Files eve...
Imagine if Vlad "The Impaler" had just f**ked ONE sheep...
December 11, 2025 at 4:18 PM
Imagine if Vlad "The Impaler" had just f**ked ONE sheep...
"May you live in interesting times"
-Proverb
"Fuck you, proverb."
-Me
-Proverb
"Fuck you, proverb."
-Me
December 6, 2025 at 12:15 PM
"May you live in interesting times"
-Proverb
"Fuck you, proverb."
-Me
-Proverb
"Fuck you, proverb."
-Me
Reposted by Dan Schwab
THERE SHOULDN'T BE PEPPER SPRAY AT ALL, TRICIA
"She wasn’t pepper sprayed," Tricia McLaughlin, a spokeswoman for the Department of Homeland Security said. "She was in the vicinity of someone who *was* pepper sprayed as they were obstructing and assaulting law enforcement."
Story by @glorihuh.bsky.social and @jerodmacevoy.com
Story by @glorihuh.bsky.social and @jerodmacevoy.com
Arizona's Congresswoman Grijalva says she was pepper sprayed during Tucson ICE raids | Arizona Mirror
Arizona’s U.S. Rep. Adelita Grijalva was involved in a clash with federal agents during a protest of immigration raids in west Tucson Friday, during which she claims she was hit with pepper spray.
azmirror.com
December 5, 2025 at 11:00 PM
THERE SHOULDN'T BE PEPPER SPRAY AT ALL, TRICIA